Parents and Teachers: I have a Facebook question/opinion for my situation..... (party, appropriate)
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I am a teacher. I am 36 years old, married with two children (this is to let you know I am not a young party girl ) I have a face book account, for my personal time. All of my teacher friends from my school are on it, plus some normal friends. No cursing on it. I do however, have pictures of me at some parties, or at a bar or two. I'm dressed fine (I'm modest ), but of course I have a beer in my hand, or it's all of us teachers hugging (maybe with some beers). No nakedness......nothing rude or inappropriate.
Just regular pictures of grown women/men enjoying themselves out. I would put these pictures in a photo album.
A mother of a child in my class just requested me as a friend. I get along well with the woman, she volunteers in my class, but we don't speak outside of a professional relationship.
I don't mind being friendly and saying sure, be my friend........but I know that teachers are held up on such pedestals, and I fear any parent that sees me a picture of me at a bar....drinking.....is going to let this change her opinion of me as a teacher. I know it shouldn't. I know I've done nothing wrong.......but I also know that some people have a different way of thinking regarding teachers.......and they don't see us as "real people".
So I'm torn between saying sure and then dealing with any consequences....or saying no....explaining why...and then having her feelings get hurt (in case she doesn't mind that teachers have personal lives).
i wouldnt befreind her.
now they have this thing where people suggest freinds to eachother. a mutual freind of one of my neighbors and myself has suggested that my neighbor and i become facebook freinds. neither one of us has done it yet.
we live next door, but will probably never be more than neighbors, and i just dont want to have to edit myself to spare their feelings.
Hi! I understand what you are saying and your concerns. Are you comfortable with just ignoring the friend request and hopefully she will get the idea? Unfortunately, I did accept a friend request too quickly that I wish I hadn't. I don't want to delete them now, that would be too awkward!
It's amazing how many friend requests I get that I hardly know...friends of friends...I just ignore them.
Good luck and hopefully, this parent will respect your privacy.
I would ignore the request. I have also learned that you can "unfriend" someone and they are not notified, so they may not even realize that you have unfriended them unless they are looking for your profile for some reason. As a teacher, I would not "friend" one of my students or parents of students while the student was still in my class. Perhaps later if I still wanted to though. I am Facebook friends with one of my old high school teachers and it is really neat because he was always my favorite teacher. Some of my teacher friends tell me that their schools actually have policies in place now against students/teachers interacting on sites like Facebook or Myspace.
I'd ignore the request and set yourself as "unsearchable"... not exactly wure how you do it, but a friend of mine is a teacher and did it. You do'nt want to put your career in jeopardy over something so silly, but it could happen if you mix your personal life with your professional life.
Be very careful with that Facebood page. I have one, but use my mother's maiden name so I can't be searched, just have certain, select friends.
Especially since you have photos of you drinking and in bars, you need to be very careful of who sees it. If the administration, or parents, or board members decide to search you on Facebook, they will all see what you have there. Even if comments are benign, the pictures might be rather offensive to the parents of the students you have. ALL IT TAKES IS ONE TO BE OFFENDED and your life can turn into a living hell. Besides that, if a parent sees it and talks to other parents... .
I do believe you can set your page to private so no one can access it without being on your friend's list. Get on you page, access the 'account' portion, then privacy features (According to my teen who has one under a pseudonym to protect herself.)
I would not befriend anyone who is a parent or in the position to make trouble for you. As innocent as your page may be, someone will find something wrong with it, i.e., the beer and bar pictures.
Too many people have lost jobs over Facebook and MySpace. There was a story on AOL this morning about a 16 year old who just began a new job in an office. She posted on her Facebook that it was a boring job. Her boss happened to check her name out and found the post. She was promptly called into the office and fired.
Ignore it or expain your decision as a "school policy." It breaches Parent/teacher Personal/proffessional relationship standards.
Yea. Facebook is funny that way. What I do when people just request me and I might have just sat across from them in homeroom or something, I accept them. If they don't comment on a photo or write on my wall within a week, I delete them.
I wouldn't friend her and as someone suggested, tell her this is just your social site and you want to keep your professional work seperate. Actually, I think if you decline it doesn't even tell you so you really don't have to say anything. I would totally understand if I were in her position although I wouldn't even ask my son's teacher to be a friend. I did friend my son's former K teacher but she moved out of state and it is just a great way to keep in touch.
Definately make sure your profile is private for only your friends and when you add pictures you need do the same thing. Some pictures I set so friends of friends can see.
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) I have a face book account, for my personal time. All of my teacher friends from my school are on it, plus some normal friends. No cursing on it. I do however, have pictures of me at some parties, or at a bar or two. I'm dressed fine (I'm modest
), but of course I have a beer in my hand, or it's all of us teachers hugging (maybe with some beers). No nakedness......nothing rude or inappropriate. 
