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I am in my early 50s and remember the days when parents were not your friends but in many cases your worst nightmare. I remember parents of some of my friends were really scary and if you crossed them they would come at you hard.
One parent liked to use his belt on the kids and when they did wrong he had a system where they pulled down their pants and the belt was used to give them a real whooping. I can still remember the yells and screams of the kids as the belt hit their buts!
Now day you go to jail for that. The kids have all the power now and everybody wonders what is wrong with the kids today. I use to work at a school and one mother told me her son use to tell her that if she didn't let him do what she wanted, he would call her and report her for child abuse and he was going wild, refusing to follow any rules.
Now they medicate them to get them to behave because they can't spank them anymore and everybody has a lable that needs medication.
I am not saying everybody needs to spank their kids. I had some that spanking is the only thing that worked and others that just a good scolding worked on. Spanking never harmed me, I have no after effects from it except that I knew I better behave and have respect!
Spanking a bottom with an open hand is one thing. I don't agree with using a weapon to hit a kid. My dad used to threaten to belt me, but I can't remember if he did. My mom used to spank me with hard-backed brushes and wooden spoons. We don't do that. Whips, belts, switches, paddles ... no. I see no excuse in the world for that.
i think parents are scared to be displining now and everyone asks why kids are out of control now ? that is why you big dummies that made it illegal to swat your kids butt . but I got a neighbor that still swats her kids on their butt . I hear her all the time tell the neighbor across the street well the bible says spare the rod and spoil the child and I do believe that is true . I dont blame her with her having 6 kids she has to control them some kind of way and let me tell you those are some of the most well behaved kids I have ever seen . as for mine you darn tootin ' I took my hand to those bottoms and guess what ? they never got brought home by the police , took drugs or skipped school or had some of the problems of other kids I know that were not spanked at home . Now they are grown up and have nice homes and good jobs and are well respected people .
i think parents are scared to be displining now and everyone asks why kids are out of control now ?
Lack of hitting does not equal lack of discipline. The root word of discipline is teach, not hit. I do not hit my kids, but they are disciplined.
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Originally Posted by phonelady61
..........with her having 6 kids she has to control them some kind of way and let me tell you those are some of the most well behaved kids I have ever seen .
The object of discipline is not to control children, but rather to teach them to control themselves. Sure you can control kids by hitting them, but what happens when the threat of being hit is not there? Do they learn self control?
I have teenagers now and they do not skip school, cause trouble, or have social problems and I do not hit them. It is much more difficult to discipline children without hitting them, but lack of hitting does not equal lack of discipline. Most parents who hit are taking the easiest path.
My older boy is almost 5. I have never used a belt to spank him, but I have used a plastic hairbrush (once). Other than that, just an open hand. When he is older, I would not rule out using a belt.
Contrary to a few of the comments here, spanking your child (including with a belt) non-injuriously is not per se illegal anywhere in the United States, and in the few cases such spankings have gone to trial, they have nearly always resulted in acquittal (Zimbalist Chalk, John Redbrook, William Williams in Florida, Walter Oliver in Connecticut, Donald Cobble in Massachusetts, Tim Sharp in California, etc.). The problem is parents are usually ignorant of the law and plea-bargain their case rather than standing up for their rights under the law.
Lack of hitting does not equal lack of discipline. ......
In fact lack of hitting MAY mean that discipline may have been successful and that is good. It may also mean that there is no discipline and that .... well not good I am afraid.
Parents just give up and let their kids run wild.
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The object of discipline is not to control children, but rather to teach them to control themselves. Sure you can control kids by hitting them, but what happens when the threat of being hit is not there? Do they learn self control?
I see hitting/spanking etc as PUNISHMENT and it is a part of disipline.
I also think that it is perfectly reasonable to control a child. Children, teens and many adults are out of control. They need to be controlled first before they mature and learn self control.
A person, especially a child or teenager, will do something that is wrong. To me they need to be punished to show them that it was wrong. That they crossed the line.
One of the problems with this sort of post titled 'do you take a belt to your kids' is that it conjures up an image of an out of control adult flaling away at a helpless child. This unfortunately reinforces the idea that corporal punishment is abuse.
I think that there are advatages to corporal punishment. Its quick and draws the line for starters. There is the difficulty these days that it is not generally accepted especially by those who work in the social services, policing and legal areas.
To finally answer your question though, I do not 'take a belt' to my kids. But I do use the paddle on them.
My older boy is almost 5. I have never used a belt to spank him, but I have used a plastic hairbrush (once). Other than that, just an open hand. When he is older, I would not rule out using a belt.
Contrary to a few of the comments here, spanking your child (including with a belt) non-injuriously is not per se illegal anywhere in the United States, and in the few cases such spankings have gone to trial, they have nearly always resulted in acquittal (Zimbalist Chalk, John Redbrook, William Williams in Florida, Walter Oliver in Connecticut, Donald Cobble in Massachusetts, Tim Sharp in California, etc.). The problem is parents are usually ignorant of the law and plea-bargain their case rather than standing up for their rights under the law.
Amen , parents are too busy worrying about if they spank them they will squash their childs creativity . give me a break I think those parents who are worried about squashing creativity have a screw loose LOL!!!
I am in my early 50s and remember the days when parents were not your friends but in many cases your worst nightmare. I remember parents of some of my friends were really scary and if you crossed them they would come at you hard.
One parent liked to use his belt on the kids and when they did wrong he had a system where they pulled down their pants and the belt was used to give them a real whooping. I can still remember the yells and screams of the kids as the belt hit their buts!
So, do parents use a belt anymore on their kids?
That is just over the line. Pulling down a kid's pants is wrong and disturbing, for any reason other than showing a toddler how to use the bathroom. There are so many things wrong with this line of thinking I can't even begin to go there. Way to psychologically, sexually, etc. f@*k up a person for a very long time, if not forever.
Amen , parents are too busy worrying about if they spank them they will squash their childs creativity . give me a break I think those parents who are worried about squashing creativity have a screw loose LOL!!!
I don't worry about creativity. I do, however, wonder how it teaches a child not to hit if we hit him.
I also wonder how a child learns self control if you are always controlling him by physical force.
Thirdly, I wonder what happens when the child is to old to be scared of his mother hitting him (my oldest is 15).
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