Outrageous Child Care Costs (day care, teaching, baby, average)

[Mayzie]

My daughter will be starting day care soon and I'm stunned at the cost. I'm sure many of you are in the same boat. I've been researching less expensive alternatives, but have had no luck so far. I read that the average family spends 25% of their income on "sub-par care". (Care is “sub-par” because many teachers make less than parking attendants resulting in high turnover rates). Unfortunately, I have not been able to find a reasonable solution. Anyone have any suggestions.

This article did give some insight into policy changes for those of us activists. This includes getting the States involved and getting better wages for teachers. I guess I can only hope to initiate child care reform before I consider having child number two.

http://www.divinecaroline.com/articl...P=KNC-DC_YSM_6

[belovenow]

Originally Posted by Mayzie

My daughter will be starting day care soon and I'm stunned at the cost. I'm sure many of you are in the same boat. I've been researching less expensive alternatives, but have had no luck so far. I read that the average family spends 25% of their income on "sub-par care". (Care is “sub-par” because many teachers make less than parking attendants resulting in high turnover rates). Unfortunately, I have not been able to find a reasonable solution. Anyone have any suggestions.
This article did give some insight into policy changes for those of us activists. This includes getting the States involved and getting better wages for teachers. I guess I can only hope to initiate child care reform before I consider having child number two.
http://www.divinecaroline.com/articl...P=KNC-DC_YSM_6

My wife and I learned this a few years ago with the birth of our 1st child. My wife went right back to work and a year later we realized that with the cost of her commute, cost of daycare, opportunity cost of not seeing her child most of the day and missing milestones, cost of staying home when our child got sick and one of us had to stay home with them, and the taxes taken out of her income... that she was barely earning any money at all. All that said, the care was sub-par with high teacher turn-over and some really bad teachers thrown in the mix.

We both are caring parents, and my wife and I had assumed that going to work for significant early career progression was in the cards for her... she got her MBA for that reason, but the reality is that looking back a few years and more children later, there is no great daytime substitute for a good/caring mother - even with cost excluded.

Our culture will have to wake up and realize this. Now all that said, I am not stupid, obviously there are situations where the mother has to work for everyone's wellbeing, and indeed it is too bad that there aren't simple and affordable childcare options available for these mothers. Paying the daycare teachers more unfortunately will backfire with even higher childcare costs, so another route will likely have to be chosen. I'd hate to see my taxes raised to subsidize someone's lifestyle choice (when there is a choice), but government money being put toward lowering the cost/subsidizing daycare may be one way to solve this.

[BlueWillowPlate]

Welcome to my world. (I am a preschool teacher.)
I have been teaching preschool for about 25 years now, with a couple breaks when I had my own kids.
I have worked at a variety of schools that ran the spectrum of childcare quality.
I worked for over 20 years at my last, *excellent* preschool in Denver.
I'm at a Head Start here now. The difference is striking.
I am of two (or three!) minds about the whole thing.
I don't think any parent can Have It All, when it comes to work and rearing a child. Working from the home while parenting sounds good in theory but I am a bit skeptical of how productive it actually is workwise, and how beneficial it actually is for the child. (However, I would love to be proven wrong!)
As for parents who are faced with working out of the home, they either are away from their kid all day, or they stay home and do not make nearly as much money, perhaps losing insurance benefits, etc.
And so far, I don't think anyone in Early Childhood Education gets it all, either.
Even teachers with 4 year degrees (or Masters) are not highly paid.
However, people in ECE are really not in it for the money.
And many parents do not have a choice about whether or not they work.
I think daycare centers at the workplace are a great idea, as are the "senior" centers where elders spend time with children. We have a senior citizen at the Head Start who volunteers her time, I think that's wonderful.
Still, our parental leave and daycare policies are not exactly like Sweden's.
People have to find their way and operate as best they see fit.
I worked part-time when my kids were little, but I realize that for some people, this is a luxury.

[Stonecoldharbours]

You know some people spend 4 grand for a montly home payment, 800 per SUV and then still complain that they have to pay low wage earner miniumn wage to care for what is most precious in the world, their children, sorry but I feel day care workers are underpaid and overworked and the children suffer cause of their materialistic parents, well some out there anyhow, I know some can't afford daycare and have to work, my heart goes out to them too, I would hate to be in that position and I do feel bad for those women, but not the greedy trophy wives who will spend a fortune on clothes and vacations and then complain they have to pay the daycare sitter, I have no sympathy for those kind of people.

[jtla]

I agree with mbuszu. For most, it's a lifestyle choice. The costs involved in daycare, commuting, a professional wardrobe, time off for sick kids, etc., essentially eats up whatever income is generated by the second parent (either mother or father). Our family came to the decision before we had kids that one of us would be the full time breadwinner and one of us would be the full time parent, so there wasn't any dilemma when the kids arrived. Part of that decision is based on my own childhood. My parents were two income way before it became common. It wasn't for necessity. It was for gratification. We lived rather high on the hog when I was little, and I was passed off to be cared for by a variety of family members before I was old enough to attend school. As an adult, I am determined to let my children know I care more for them than my possessions.

If you are only income source for your family or if two incomes are the only way to eat, maybe you should try to think outside the box. Try to find family members, neighbors, or church members who stay home with their children and try to come to an arrangement to care for yours as well. Try finding a job where they offer childcare. I don't mean working at a daycare facility (although it is a possibility), but looking for employers that offer significant on site facilities. Try changing careers to find something that allows you to work from home.

Having the government subsidize child care is not the solution. It's not their responsibility. Besides, when has the government ever run anything efficiently? The goverment doesn't create money. It takes its money from all of us through taxes, both personal and corporate. It's not my responsibility to pay people (through my increased taxes) to care for their kids when they didn't make proper provision or planning. If people need a safety net, we have that.

The bottom line is that NO ONE cares more about the welfare of your child than you do. They are our one irreplacable possession. You can delay gratification on getting the new car or the new promotion, but your child will only ever learn to walk or talk one time. They will remember you being there, not the new furniture or the new toys.

[alexander59]

Don't have children if you can not invest in the time and money to take care of them. My children never saw the inside of a day care and I always worked, the solution was simple, one parent worked at night and one worked during the day. The only relative I had was my oldest daughter who should not be responsible for her little sister. Day care workers get paid very little, barely a little over minimum wage in Florida, kids for the most part are just housed, and the best day cares have waiting lists and are very expensive.
Its amazing how little you can live on and not go without.

[Katarina Witt]

The solutions offered by jtla (on-site care, care by friends and relatives, etc) still cost money. I used an on-site care center part-time when my first child was a toddler; it cost as much as any other day care center. The advantage was that the day-care employees worked for the same employer as me, so there was a bit more accountablility. I had no relatives in this area when my children were young. I had friends and neighbors who did day care, and I utilized their services, but I paid them. Working opposite shifts works for some, not all. I could have done that, and I know nurses who did (do). Most that I knew still had to arrange some sort of care due to overlaps, need for sleep and whatnot. I did not want to give up all family time together.

I was in a babysitting co-op when my children were very small. We traded babysitting for points, not pay. It worked fine, but I only used it for work if I had to go in for a meeting or something else short time. There is no way you can work even part time and then babysit your hours away. Plus, I got to the point where I didn't want to watch someone else's kids in my so-called spare time.

I did what cil did; I worked part time, sometimes more, sometimes less. Nursing jobs tend to be fairly inflexible, so pt was a good compromise. While my husband worked an office job and seemed to be able to get time off fairly easily, not so in nursing. We were able to take the financial hit.

There is a spreadsheet on msn money that has you plug in day-care costs, taxes, transportation, etc to find out how much you really take home. I tried it just for fun, as my children are grown now. I would not have made much $, only $5/hr or so free and clear paying day-care for two kids, working 4 days a week, which is ft in my job. If you're desperate, that's a lot to give up, but if you can economize somewhere else, it's worth it for your sanity, your kids' sanity and your spouse's sanity.

I will put in a good word for day-care workers. Both my daughters have done child care summers while in college; one is going to work at a sleep-over camp this summer. It's hard work. Mine got paid $7.50 - 9.50/hr. Not bad for college kids, but hardly enough to make a living.

[christina0001]

I agree, the costs of daycare are outrageous...yet the people working there, taking care of the children, get paid pennies.
I am planning on being a stay at home mom when we start a family in a year or so. We plan on buying a home in the next 12 months, and when we do, it will be based on my husband's income only. If I can, I will work part time while he is at home with the kids, or I will watch someone else's children (no more than 1-2) while I am at home. Financially, at least 25% of my take home pay would have to go towards day care, and as stated above when you factor in the cost of commuting, professional wardrobe, lunches, etc., I don't think it's worth it. And as a prospective parent, I don't think it's in the child's best interest to place them for 9+ hours a day in the cheapest daycare available. I really feel one parent (doesn't matter which) or even another family member is the best care for the child. Unfortunately my husband and I have no one in the family who could watch our children, and he makes more money than I do, so I'll be the one to stay at home. If I made more money than he did, I would love to go to work and have him be a stay at home dad. When the kids are old enough to go to school, I'll get a part time job during the day.
I know my philosophies don't work for everyone...but for me personally, I would rather not have kids, than have kids and have to drop them off at daycare at 7:30am, and pick them up at 5pm.

[Stonecoldharbours]

I am a stay at home mom and we wouldn't have it any other way!!!, We manage cause we stick to a budget...I would never put my child in one, cause I worked in them and for pennies, as a single woman, seen too much and was rather disgusted too. Most mothers who came in where rude, well off and only cared bout their SUVS and had big hair.

[jkmewright]

I am a mother who is raising her child in a one parent home (avoiding the use of "single" mother lol). The PLAN was for me to stay at home until my son was old enough for school. Things did not work out that way. Now I work and he is in daycare/preschool. Fortunately I found a wonderful place for my son to spend his day but it did cost me a pretty penny. Actually the monthly amount is 20% higher than my mortgage but I don't begrudge a cent as it's a great place. Again, I would have chosen to stay at home. Not all of those mothers who "dump" their kids off on other ppl to raise are women who don't want to raise their children. We are just women who do the best we can w/what we have.