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I am not a parent, but I am a high school teacher and am looking for feedback. I posted this in the education forum, but I thought I would post it here to get some more input from a parent's perspective. Here's the original post:
Last night was our first round of parent teacher conferences. They went from 4-8 pm. Out of the 187 students I teach this semester, I had a grand total of 1parent show up!! Of course, this is a good student and she is currently receiving a B in my class. I spent the rest of the evening calling and emailing parents of the students failing my classes. (about 30)
I arrive at school this morning and I received no voice mails or emails responding to my concerns.
I am sitting here today on this Friday morning before work begins, dead tired, and wondering why parents are so disinterested..............
******************
So that was last Thursday night. I have gotten one response back from a parent. The rest haven't bothered to call or email me back, even though their child is failing. We have the last round of conferences tonight, and I am hoping some of them show up. But I'm not counting on it.
So parents of teenagers I ask you........do you attend parent teacher conferences? Why or why not? Does it make a difference what the subject is or if your child is failing?
HG.....I have 2 kids. DD is a sophomore in college, DS is a sophomore in HS...I have gone to (and continue to go to DS's) every parent conference, every semester for both kids. I don't get the parents who don't. My kids are well behaved kids and good students and I generally do know what is going on with them in their classes because we actually talk but I do want to meet the teachers and I think the teachers DO notice which parents show up and which don't. If a teacher notices something concerning, I feel he or she is more likely to let me know if he or she knows I am interested enough to come to conferences....plus, I want my kids to know that I value education all the way through not just when they are in grade school.....Kids still need to be parented.
My oldest son is in middle school... so we're not quite at the high school level yet... but here's my situation:
I had no idea that there were parent teacher conferences at the middle school next week until I happened to run into the vice principal (I know her because we volunteer together in the elementary school) and she mentioned something.
In my son's case, when I asked him about it, he replied "Oh! I have this form for you to sign..." and he digs in his backpack and pulls out this crumpled parent teacher conference sign-up form. It was supposed to have been filled out and returned quite awhile ago. He's a good student, too, and it wasn't one of those situations where a student doesn't want their parents involved. He just genuinely forgot because he has so many other things going on at the bginning of the school year. I've noticed this over the years that both my kids seem more forgettful at the beginning of the year than towards the middle or end of it. I'm guessing it's just that with the start of a new school year and so many new procedures to get their minds around and new everythings going on... it's hard to remember everything.
I think, too, that most parents of kids middle school age and up tend to begin to back off and want their kids to learn how to handle things on their own. Personally I begin this process of pulling back with my kids beginning about 4th grade so that they are ready for being more independent by middle school. We assume that teachers will contact us if they think their is a problem or concern of any kind. Instead of the constant contact like most parents often have during elementary school to make sure their kids are learning to be responsible and follow directions and all of that... we begin to pull back a bit.
Anyway - I think a more direct means of communication between parents and teachers is a good idea. Teenagers have their minds on all kinds of other things... it's a good idea to just email or call parents directly and not rely on paper newsletters or notes home or something that would involve the students or would require the parents to cull through all kinds of other information. Just call or email the parents directly. The ones that don't email back within a few days or so, do a follow-up phone call.
I have to say, though, that parent teacher conferences are getting to be a bit of a joke in our schools, where we live. They are timed - 20 minutes. I rush in, listen to the teacher whiz through all this goobly-gock in teacher-talk... then presto... it's over and I'm scooted on my way out the door and it's time for the next parent to come in and have their turn. I never learn anything. I always have to request another meeting with the teacher where we're more relaxed and have more time to discuss things and I have time to ask questions so that I can decode the teacher talk.
Here is how parent teacher conferences work in our area:
We are notified via email and by phone. The school website also has it hi-lighted at the top. It is scheduled as an "open house" style where all of the teachers are sitting at tables (by dept) from about 3 until about 7 for 2 days. Parents go, and stand in line for their turn with each teacher. There are little signs on the table that ask you to limit your conversations to 5 minutes. If you have something more in depth to discuss, make an appointment. My experience (from how long my wait in certain lines is) is that our conferences are fairly well attended. My "conferences" mainly consist of introductions then the teacher looking up my childs grades and telling me what his grade is and if he or she has any concerns. I also take the opportunity to communicate to teachers things about my child they may not be aware of that might give them some insight. Also, I make sure to mention to specific teachers that my child particularly enjoys their class and why. I do expect that my child takes responsibility for his grades however, I am still the parent and taking the time to attend the conferences tells both the teachers and my kids that I will take the time for them....
BTW - thanks for the reminder. I am scheduled to bring a case of water for the teachers at our HS this week!
We call then parent teacher interviews and yes, I attend.
I do actually find it useful to find out how the kids are being viewed by a teacher in the overall development. How they are functioning with their peers as much as how they are coping with learning.
At an earlier school they would schedule them a few weeks into the school year. This I found a little disconcerting as there relationship with the fresh school year was in an embyronic stage.
I make a point of going and find it strange that only one parent turned up at the Denver school, I take it to be. Did weather conditions have anything to do with it?
I do my best to check in with MOST of the teachers on a weekly basis. I also check my daughter's grades online every week. I don't do crowds well...nor do I do standing in line for 2 hours when I get to rush in and speak to a teacher for 20 min. each. It is very frustrating for me. So I skip them and focus on other ways to communicate with the teachers. I email them regularly for brief updates on my daughter's progress.
I am not a parent, but I am a high school teacher and am looking for feedback. I posted this in the education forum, but I thought I would post it here to get some more input from a parent's perspective. Here's the original post:
Last night was our first round of parent teacher conferences. They went from 4-8 pm. Out of the 187 students I teach this semester, I had a grand total of 1parent show up!! Of course, this is a good student and she is currently receiving a B in my class. I spent the rest of the evening calling and emailing parents of the students failing my classes. (about 30)
I arrive at school this morning and I received no voice mails or emails responding to my concerns.
I am sitting here today on this Friday morning before work begins, dead tired, and wondering why parents are so disinterested..............
******************
So that was last Thursday night. I have gotten one response back from a parent. The rest haven't bothered to call or email me back, even though their child is failing. We have the last round of conferences tonight, and I am hoping some of them show up. But I'm not counting on it.
So parents of teenagers I ask you........do you attend parent teacher conferences? Why or why not? Does it make a difference what the subject is or if your child is failing?
I answered on the other forum as well but I wanted to clarify.
At the school my kids attend (private high school in FL) either teacher or parent can request a conference. If a teacher requested a conference I would attend regardless of what subject it is or whether my child is passing the class. If a teacher needs to discuss anything with me I will be available.
At the school where I teach either the parent or teacher can request a conference. If a conference is requested by a parent, all the child's teachers are asked to attend. It helps to ensure consistency with a child who is struggling. Often teachers of a class that a student is successful in can be helped by having the other teachers there.
I know that you mentioned on the other thread that many of your students are struggling. Perhaps the reason they struggle is that nobody at home helps them at all. If my son were struggling in a class I would certainly attend his conferences no matter how old he was.
I think that parents don't take these "mass conference days" all that seriously.
My oldest son is in middle school... so we're not quite at the high school level yet... but here's my situation:
I had no idea that there were parent teacher conferences at the middle school next week until I happened to run into the vice principal (I know her because we volunteer together in the elementary school) and she mentioned something.
In my son's case, when I asked him about it, he replied "Oh! I have this form for you to sign..." and he digs in his backpack and pulls out this crumpled parent teacher conference sign-up form. It was supposed to have been filled out and returned quite awhile ago. He's a good student, too, and it wasn't one of those situations where a student doesn't want their parents involved. He just genuinely forgot because he has so many other things going on at the bginning of the school year. I've noticed this over the years that both my kids seem more forgettful at the beginning of the year than towards the middle or end of it. I'm guessing it's just that with the start of a new school year and so many new procedures to get their minds around and new everythings going on... it's hard to remember everything.
I think, too, that most parents of kids middle school age and up tend to begin to back off and want their kids to learn how to handle things on their own. Personally I begin this process of pulling back with my kids beginning about 4th grade so that they are ready for being more independent by middle school. We assume that teachers will contact us if they think their is a problem or concern of any kind. Instead of the constant contact like most parents often have during elementary school to make sure their kids are learning to be responsible and follow directions and all of that... we begin to pull back a bit.
Anyway - I think a more direct means of communication between parents and teachers is a good idea. Teenagers have their minds on all kinds of other things... it's a good idea to just email or call parents directly and not rely on paper newsletters or notes home or something that would involve the students or would require the parents to cull through all kinds of other information. Just call or email the parents directly. The ones that don't email back within a few days or so, do a follow-up phone call.
I have to say, though, that parent teacher conferences are getting to be a bit of a joke in our schools, where we live. They are timed - 20 minutes. I rush in, listen to the teacher whiz through all this goobly-gock in teacher-talk... then presto... it's over and I'm scooted on my way out the door and it's time for the next parent to come in and have their turn. I never learn anything. I always have to request another meeting with the teacher where we're more relaxed and have more time to discuss things and I have time to ask questions so that I can decode the teacher talk.
I have 187 students!! I can't call or email every parent on a weekly basis like an elementary school teacher with a classroom of 30 students can. I do all I can to contact the parents of failing studetns. However, I think if the parents were truly interested in their child's education, they would make some sort of effort to contact me back, whether that be in person, via email, or over the phone.
As for not being aware of your son's conferences, were they also posted on the school's web site, the district web site, etc.? They are usually set way ahead of time. Our's have been scheduled since August.
I have 187 students!! I can't call or email every parent on a weekly basis like an elementary school teacher with a classroom of 30 students can. I do all I can to contact the parents of failing studetns. However, I think if the parents were truly interested in their child's education, they would make some sort of effort to contact me back, whether that be in person, via email, or over the phone.
As for not being aware of your son's conferences, were they also posted on the school's web site, the district web site, etc.? They are usually set way ahead of time. Our's have been scheduled since August.
I don't think that you need to contact the parents of all 187 students (I have 210 this year). However, if there are students who are in need of parental intervention you can contact those parents.
These mass conference days are a waste of time at the elementary level and I think that by the time kids get to high school most parents just dismiss them as unimportant. That is why our school does not do them. If we need a conference we ask for one. If the parents need one they can ask for one.
I do contact the parents of students getting Ds or Fs.......just frustrated because they don't bother to contact me back and I have better things to do that just sit here and wait for them to call or show up.
This is an international baccalaureate school by the way, not a Title I school or anything like that. I guess most parents just don't find the conferences important. Which, if that is the case, I wonder why we still have them?
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