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Hello. I am a single father. I have 2 daughters. My oldest, is grown. I raised her by myself. My little daughter is 2 years and 9 months old. Almost 3. She had been fully potty trained for a long time now. She never has accidents during the day at all. But at night, she will wake up every 2 hours and cry. I have a baby monitor camera complete with audio mounted on her bedroom wall, and the monitoring screen sits next to my bed in my bedroom. So every time she wakes up crying, she immediately wakes me up as well, which is no kind of fun. Her problem is not that she wets the bed. Let me make that clear, first of all. She completely understands that she should go potty in her potty training toilet. Before bed every night, I always bring her potty into her bedroom, and place it within 2-3 feet of her toddler bed. I always make sure she doesn’t drink any fluids at least an hour (if not more) before bed. I always give her a bath at night about an hour before bed. And, I read her a bedtime story each night before bed. Just to give you a clear idea of the nightly routine.
So, the problem is? That she simply refuses to get up, get out of her bed, walk 2 steps, and sit down on her toddler potty, and go pee at night. Instead? She just wakes up crying, then starts screaming as well. When I go into her room to ask her what is wrong? I always get the same response from her. “Potty”.
Uugh! She WON’T just get out of bed and go! She makes me get up and go into her bedroom and THEN after I tell her to get up and go potty? She’ll get up and go. Otherwise? She’ll just sit there crying and eventually, wet the bed.
She is extremely intelligent and very sweet and loves to learn. So why can’t she grasp such a seemingly sinple concept? I also show her every night, that her potty toilet is right there. And yes, she also has a nightlight in her room, so her bedroom is well illuminated. That is not the issue at all.
I’m doing everything a person is supposed to do. Yet, she won’t simply get up and go on her own. She would rather pee the bed, if I don’t wake up and go in her room to be there for her to go pee!
Don’t go in. Go to her door, tell her to go “potty.”
Put moisture resistant sheets on her bed. If she pees the bed, let her lay in it for a night or two. She’ll get the hint. Especially since she’s so extremely intelligent.
She’s 2., not 12…when she cries in the middle of the night, annoying to you or not, if your job as he father to go check on her and take her potty if she needs to go. Letting her lay in pee soaked sheets is abusive and wrong on so many levels.
Put a waterproof pad on the mattress and get used to washing sheets. She’s TWO YEARS OLD, you’re expecting way too much from her. Let me guess… you’ve read or have told that by two
She should be completely potty trained… got news for ya, that’s not true.
I think she just needs your reassurance and assistance for awhile.
Try prepping her every day for awhile by enthusiastically saying in a cheerleader type of way: "The potty is in your room so when you feel like you have to go, you can just get up and go all by yourself!" YAY!!!
Maybe bribe her with a reward too (like one M&M or something).
If she calls you in then say, "Oh, you forgot! The potty is right here and you're a big girl! You can do it by yourself next time!"
OP, she is waaaaaaaay too young to expect this of her (using the potty at night alone). She would need help washing her hands if nothing else. She might even be scared of the dark, or the cold in taking her jammies off.
OP, she is waaaaaaaay too young to expect this of her (using the potty at night alone). She would need help washing her hands if nothing else. She might even be scared of the dark, or the cold in taking her jammies off.
I agree. Every child is different, but IMHO, it is extremely inappropriate to expect that level of independence with a child that young.
"She would rather pee the bed, if I don’t wake up and go in her room to be there for her to go pee!" I guarantee she would rather not pee the bed, it's just that it's scarier for her to get out of bed on her own at night than it is to wet the bed and face your anger. You are expecting an adult response from a tiny human who is not yet 3.
I get your desperation, broken sleep is brutal. Remember, it's not personal, she's not doing this deliberately to bug you. If she was sleeping through the night before and this is a change, it sounds like it's maybe less about physically needing to use the potty and more about her being anxious at night, waking up and not being able to go back to sleep, and wanting reassurance that you are still there. You being upset and/or distant is only going to make her more anxious, possibly to the point that she pees herself. Maybe she's saying "potty" because she doesn't yet know how to name or express whatever it is she's feeling, but she understands that "potty" usually gets an adult response so that's what comes out. That sleep-wake space is a very strange time for all humans, more so when you are little, and there's massive amounts of growth happening at her age, so there'll be a lot going on in that little head, it could be bad dreams are waking her up. Any transitions happening that are throwing her off-kilter?
What about using pull-ups until she moves through this phase? That will at least take the heat out of the situation and save the laundry, and hopefully buy you some more sleep. She's only 2, there's plenty of kids wearing pull-ups at 3, 4, 5 and beyond. And if she still wakes up even using pullups, you'll know that it's probably not about the potty. Don't make this a flashpoint.
Also, have you talked to her pediatrician to make sure there's nothing medical going on? Maybe she's getting silent reflux and that's waking her up? Maybe it's a UTI, although unlikely at her age. Every kid is different, but if you are restricting liquid in the evening and she uses the toilet before bed, on the face of it she should generally be able to make it through most nights until waketime.
But at night, she will wake up every 2 hours and cry. I have a baby monitor camera complete with audio mounted on her bedroom wall, and the monitoring screen sits next to my bed in my bedroom. So every time she wakes up crying, she immediately wakes me up as well, which is no kind of fun.
Probably just a phase that she'll grow out of with a little patience.
As for you getting up several times during the night, get used to it. Some day when you are old you'll need to pee several times a night. LOL.
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