Extra Financial Support for DD College Education (pay, rent, buy)
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The question is about the continuing financial support of our daughter's college education after full 4 years. Here is the latest situation;
She is our only child. Now she finished her 4th year last month but can't graduate on time, since she did not take senior project. We all ( three parties ) agreed that all of parents support, i.e, education and living expense will end after 4 years in her college. We received a call from her yesterday, to earn her living expense, she said she find a summer job , and asked us to support her transportation means.
What advice will you offer to us? Thanks in advance.
Did you pay for all her expenses up to this point and she would have graduated loan free? If so, I'd sit her down and explain that you are willing to extend her a LOAN for the additional costs to complete her education. I'd also present her with a payment plan that will go into effect once she graduates. Then I'd stick to it, adding interest only in any month where she fails to make a payment.
She had nominal loan about 8k, we paid almost everything else. She can hardly sit down with us to discuss anything, and so far I don't see any commitment/plan from her, just a vague promise that she will finish her degree next summer.
Thanks for your response btw.
Quote:
Originally Posted by UNC4Me
Did you pay for all her expenses up to this point and she would have graduated loan free? If so, I'd sit her down and explain that you are willing to extend her a LOAN for the additional costs to complete her education. I'd also present her with a payment plan that will go into effect once she graduates. Then I'd stick to it, adding interest only in any month where she fails to make a payment.
Was one of the three parties your daughter? What was the plan for this situation?
Any further help should be time-limited so she knows she is on the clock to graduate and take care of herself. If you have the means, and she is making every effort, then I would be inclined to help her out in this situation.
She had nominal loan about 8k, we paid almost everything else. She can hardly sit down with us to discuss anything, and so far I don't see any commitment/plan rom her, just a vague promise that she will finish her degree next summer.
We cross-posted. I would make her sit down and discuss her ongoing situation. She needs to make commitments to herself and to you if she expects further financial help from you.
Yes, me, wife and her.
We do have means, problem is we dont know if she made effort at all, she behaves like a black hole to us, so to speak.
Quote:
Originally Posted by PureHapa
Was one of the three parties your daughter? What was the plan for this situation?
Any further help should be time-limited so she knows she is on the clock to graduate and take care of herself. If you have the means, and she is making every effort, then I would be inclined to help her out in this situation.
Yes, me, wife and her.
We do have means, problem is we dont know if she made effort at all, she behaves like a black hole to us, so to speak.
Well, that's an issue. Many young people don't graduate, but continue on with school with no targeted end - just dragging on and on. She needs to start being honest with you about what she is doing, and be appreciative of what you have already done. You will need to remind her of that.
We received a call from her yesterday, to earn her living expense, she said she find a summer job , and asked us to support her transportation means.
Underlining is mine.
Until she can prove to you she's willing to pay her own way at this point, give her a bicycle. Then tell her that if she mails you $xxx per month, on time every month for 3 months, you'll RENT her a car on a rent-to-own basis. The payments must continue or she's back to the bicycle.
Basically she means that we buy a car for her and pay insurance as well. She will pay gas and maintenance. If we said give her a bike, she will feel offended, really. We had said before if she gets on senior project and need arises, we will give her a car, but so far she just doesn't touch senior project issue at all and never explains to us why.
Quote:
Originally Posted by RyanR
Underlining is mine.
Until she can prove to you she's willing to pay her own way at this point, give her a bicycle. Then tell her that if she mails you $xxx per month, on time every month for 3 months, you'll RENT her a car on a rent-to-own basis. The payments must continue or she's back to the bicycle.
In that case, she's offended you. Why should you concede to her? A little tough love...
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