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Old 04-25-2008, 04:56 PM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
221 posts, read 519,871 times
Reputation: 106

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Garson View Post
When I first moved here I thought people were friendly but really liked to stay to themselves and I had a hard time meeting people. Then I realized that the problem was me and I started putting myself out there and worked on being friendlier myself.
I now have an amazing group of friends - I would do anything for them and they would do anything for me.
Having worked with the general public for years all over the country I can tell you I loved my AZ customers the most!
I don't think that's been our problem up here in the Bay Area. My wife and I go out all the time, though I will admit we do this much more on weekends as our free time on weekdays is more limited. It could be that we're blue collar (dual income, no kids) and live in a predominantly white collar suburb of affluent families? We've crossed paths with so many condescending snobs in the past two years of trying to socialize. Can't help but feel disheartened and disillusioned.

Regardless of what the problem is, we decided it's time to move on. We look forward to properly visiting Phoenix later this year. I will say that in our travels elsewhere throughout Arizona, we met plenty of friendly people, though they were mostly fellow tourists like us.
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Old 04-25-2008, 05:10 PM
 
4,250 posts, read 10,452,646 times
Reputation: 1484
My experience? I made friends very easily in the Bay Area. Cannot say the same for this place.

I just got blown off by someone who I wanted to take out to dinner for her BD or give her a present! (and I'm a straight female, btw - important to note) And this would have been on any day of her choosing, not her actual BD. And this is someone I exchange emails with CONSTANTLY. I think people are of the...Let's do lunch, someday...variety (really sort of reminds me of SoCal, and I lived there too).

Oh well, just my two cents. Ok, so my mileage has varied here and not in a good way. Maybe your experience will be better!
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Old 04-25-2008, 05:10 PM
 
Location: Sonoran Desert
39,077 posts, read 51,246,227 times
Reputation: 28325
I think it is helpful to live in master planned communities with community activities like Cpt Bill is talking about. In fact, if you don't meet people in one of these communities you have no one to blame but yourself. There are many MPCs scattered around the area.
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Old 04-25-2008, 05:20 PM
 
4,250 posts, read 10,452,646 times
Reputation: 1484
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ponderosa View Post
I think it is helpful to live in master planned communities with community activities like Cpt Bill is talking about. In fact, if you don't meet people in one of these communities you have no one to blame but yourself. There are many MPCs scattered around the area.
Well, I think this is a really good idea. People who live in these places will have a lot in common and seek the same lifestyle. Sounds like a plan to me
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Old 04-25-2008, 08:40 PM
 
2,039 posts, read 6,324,361 times
Reputation: 581
Smile I understand what you are saying!

Quote:
Originally Posted by movin'on View Post
Well, I think this is a really good idea. People who live in these places will have a lot in common and seek the same lifestyle. Sounds like a plan to me
Hey Movin'On -

I too had a very difficult time making friends and then I did the unthinkable. I became VP of our home owners association! That was; by far; the best thing I had ever done!

We started having wine parties for the women, cigar parties for the men, kids days, and I wrote the community newsletter. If it wasn't for my neighbors, I would be miserable. The thing I found out is that, they were as lonely as I was!

The crazy thing about Phoenix is that it is really, really hard to make friends. I don't know why, but it just is. So many people I know have said that to me. So please do not feel that you are the only one, you most certainly are not! I'm not sure if it's because a bunch of people suddenly converged on one place at once or what, but yours is a common complaint.

I think that for certain ages and personality types, Phoenix is the best place - EVER! And then for some, it's not.

As for me, well; I'm just homesick. And since no-one in my family has any desire to move to the west coast, I must move back east. I feel I've really grown up here and have learned a lot of lessons, so that's a plus. But I too, found Phoenix very difficult to live in.
I just think some people belong in certain areas and other don't. I'm the type of person who thinks that most people are generally good and well meaning, so I can't say that all the people who are in Phoenix are jerks, because they most certainly are not. I am just an outsider who wants to go back home. And the funny thing is, once I told people that I was so homesick and wanted to leave -- I made some of the best friends ever!

I do think Phoenix citizens are friendly, you just have to find your place is all. And don't be afraid to share your feelings, because even though many people on this forum who answer your posts do not share your feelings, I think that just as many people DO agree -- they just don't post as much.

I wish you the best.

LB
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Old 04-25-2008, 11:36 PM
 
Location: Red Rock, Arizona
683 posts, read 2,651,873 times
Reputation: 513
Here's something that worked great for me. I started a "Yahoo Group" for my neighborhood.

Yahoo! Groups - Join or create groups, clubs, forums & communities

It took a couple years to really get it going, but now it's grown a lot and many of my neighbors use it to communicate with each other. We have a community newsletter that comes out twice a year and I always put a note in there inviting people to join our group. Word of mouth also generates new members.

Some of the subjects we post messages about are; neighborhood parties and meetings, suspicious activities or people, garage sales, lost pets, community issues, wildlife we've spotted, and many other things.

We can also do polls, post pictures, and create files for things like the minutes from neighborhood association meetings.

It's been really good for our neighborhood as many of us have gotten to know each other through our online meeting place.
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Old 04-26-2008, 06:49 AM
 
2,137 posts, read 3,860,163 times
Reputation: 608
Quote:
Originally Posted by atkinsbeach View Post
I don't think that's been our problem up here in the Bay Area. My wife and I go out all the time, though I will admit we do this much more on weekends as our free time on weekdays is more limited. It could be that we're blue collar (dual income, no kids) and live in a predominantly white collar suburb of affluent families? We've crossed paths with so many condescending snobs in the past two years of trying to socialize. Can't help but feel disheartened and disillusioned.

Regardless of what the problem is, we decided it's time to move on. We look forward to properly visiting Phoenix later this year. I will say that in our travels elsewhere throughout Arizona, we met plenty of friendly people, though they were mostly fellow tourists like us.
Sorry that your SF experience was so negative. I love SF, but there is a vibe there...that cultural elite thing that is in the media now adays I guess. I always assume that it is insecurity driving this kind of behavior and time will ease the victim into a better attitude!

Anyway to the subject at hand. I agree with most of the other posters. Phx is a VERY friendly place, but you have to make an effort. I've known people that were on the shy side that felt very isolated. A lot of this has to do with the heat (no I'm not kidding) and the way the city is layed out. The heat keeps people indoors for a good 4-5 months....you pretty much plan one indoor activity after the next. And the layout is pretty much sub-urban. People drive from work to their home and disappear behind their garage door.

If you are interested in sports you will find one to join here. Also biking, mtn climbing, hiking are VERY poplular and the clubs welcome new members. There is a young but vibrant art community downtown phx. The downtown area is just becoming to come alive....so if you guys are a bit bohemian you might look around there for a house or apartment.

If you like the suburbs...you have PLENTY to choose from. You might think twice before moving to one of the family oriented ones if you aren't planning on kids. Not that there is anything wrong with these areas....they are great if you have little kids. There are plenty of neighborhoods that are more "mixed" with some childfree people, some elderly, some kids, etc.

If you need help choosing an area or neighborhood, just post your question here and you will get lots of help. Phx is soooooooooo big, geographically and very different from one suburb to the next it really will make a huge difference in your experience if you find the right place for you. It will make meeting like minds easier.

I think you will love it here. I've been here for 6 years (lived in LA, SF, Portland, NYC) and think it is great.
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Old 04-26-2008, 01:55 PM
 
2,039 posts, read 6,324,361 times
Reputation: 581
Quote:
Originally Posted by BillyBaroo View Post
Here's something that worked great for me. I started a "Yahoo Group" for my neighborhood.

Yahoo! Groups - Join or create groups, clubs, forums & communities

It took a couple years to really get it going, but now it's grown a lot and many of my neighbors use it to communicate with each other. We have a community newsletter that comes out twice a year and I always put a note in there inviting people to join our group. Word of mouth also generates new members.

Some of the subjects we post messages about are; neighborhood parties and meetings, suspicious activities or people, garage sales, lost pets, community issues, wildlife we've spotted, and many other things.

We can also do polls, post pictures, and create files for things like the minutes from neighborhood association meetings.

It's been really good for our neighborhood as many of us have gotten to know each other through our online meeting place.
That's a WONDERFUL idea, I know many neighborhoods that have their own websites too. I found that just being proactive was the best way to go!
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Old 04-26-2008, 02:49 PM
 
Location: USA
3,966 posts, read 10,701,411 times
Reputation: 2228
I've lived in phoenix for a couple years and find it "ok". People friendly? no. To many back east people have moved here.
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Old 04-26-2008, 06:42 PM
 
8 posts, read 23,949 times
Reputation: 15
Smile getting less nervous...

Quote:
Originally Posted by londonbarcelona View Post
Hey Movin'On -

I too had a very difficult time making friends and then I did the unthinkable. I became VP of our home owners association! That was; by far; the best thing I had ever done!

We started having wine parties for the women, cigar parties for the men, kids days, and I wrote the community newsletter. If it wasn't for my neighbors, I would be miserable. The thing I found out is that, they were as lonely as I was!

The crazy thing about Phoenix is that it is really, really hard to make friends. I don't know why, but it just is. So many people I know have said that to me. So please do not feel that you are the only one, you most certainly are not! I'm not sure if it's because a bunch of people suddenly converged on one place at once or what, but yours is a common complaint.

I think that for certain ages and personality types, Phoenix is the best place - EVER! And then for some, it's not.

As for me, well; I'm just homesick. And since no-one in my family has any desire to move to the west coast, I must move back east. I feel I've really grown up here and have learned a lot of lessons, so that's a plus. But I too, found Phoenix very difficult to live in.
I just think some people belong in certain areas and other don't. I'm the type of person who thinks that most people are generally good and well meaning, so I can't say that all the people who are in Phoenix are jerks, because they most certainly are not. I am just an outsider who wants to go back home. And the funny thing is, once I told people that I was so homesick and wanted to leave -- I made some of the best friends ever!

I do think Phoenix citizens are friendly, you just have to find your place is all. And don't be afraid to share your feelings, because even though many people on this forum who answer your posts do not share your feelings, I think that just as many people DO agree -- they just don't post as much.

I wish you the best.

LB
It is nice to read the positive feedback... My whole family (immediate-husband, son & Mom) are relocating to Arizona. I have been researching and as with anything I am getting MANY mixed reviews. I don't know about VP of the homeowners group, but hmmm ya never know!

We will initially rent, but need a house so one of the master planned communities sounds really great to me. Thanks for reminding me what I have known all along, "Life is what you make of it."

And as far as too many easterners moving out there... just haven't met the right ones. We are from Capital Region NY and very friendly. We've heard great things and look forward to meeting NICE people!
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