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It's just stage fright. You just need something to get you over the hump to build up that confidence. For your issue I'd suggest getting a little buzzed and maybe even taking Viagra. Vodka seems to work best.
This works every time to erase that anxiety. Just try it.
Forget the professionals and don't worry about losing your v-card. Just get yourself to the point where you can have an actual relationship with a girlfriend. Your problem will be solved by this.
It's just stage fright. You just need something to get you over the hump to build up that confidence. For your issue I'd suggest getting a little buzzed and maybe even taking Viagra. Vodka seems to work best.
This works every time to erase that anxiety. Just try it.
This really has nothing to do with OPs issues. Porn is to men is what reading idiotic romance novels like 50 shades of gay is to women. Men do it, because if they cannot have sex, for whatever reason - most likely lack of willing partner, they are physiologically tortured by their own bodies. Women don't deal with this and they have no idea what sexual release means to men.
So wrong on so many levels I can't even begin to argue with you.
This really has nothing to do with OPs issues. Porn is to men is what reading idiotic romance novels like 50 shades of gay is to women. Men do it, because if they cannot have sex, for whatever reason - most likely lack of willing partner, they are physiologically tortured by their own bodies. Women don't deal with this and they have no idea what sexual release means to men.
Yah...but you wont see book reading screw up a woman sexually
I got what Funymann was saying...and I do think being entrenched in "romance novels" (I seriously feel like I'm from the 40s even saying that phrase!) could potentially harm a woman's ability to have a relationship (in a similar fashion to the porn examples above), if she were that entrenched (as a parallel, the guy masturbating to porn is probably doing so daily - this is the hypothetical guy in question, NOT the average guy, disclaimer disclaimer, nobody have a cow ).
IOW, if this hypothetical woman believed that was how relationships were supposed to be, how could any actual, breathing man ever measure up?
I think, beyond the humor, that was what FM was getting at. Sorry to speak for you, FM.
Now, as I said, I really don't know anybody who reads that stuff and certainly not on a regular basis, though I guess chick lit could be a crossover in many ways. Hard to say and it's probably a case-by-case sort of thing. Or at least I don't know anybody who admits to it, LOL. So this really is just hypothetical.
I do know that a lot of women I've known (and I myself, as a younger woman) believe in the fairytale overall because even without "romance novels," we have movies and so on that depict these perfect males. That's a cultural thing, though, and goes for both sexes: men are exposed to billboards and movies and shows of these perfect women. Any reasonable person (over the age of 15 or so, anyway) would know that both are unrealistic, but I think there's a percentage of people who do believe in such fantasies and therefore can't seem to have actual, faulty, normal relationships.
No idea if that's the OP's problem, hopefully he'll get with someone qualified who can help him figure it all out. Or maybe vodka and Viagra really are his answer...who knows? (shrug) Whatever the answer is, I hope the OP finds it.
I'm sure this doesn't apply to most guys (as I think most guys do watch porn - not all, but many/most), BUT I get the feeling that the extreme over-the-topness of porn makes "normal" sex just not work for certain guys. The perfect body, she's screaming, literally screaming like someone is sticking pins in her eyes because she looooooooooooooooooves it so much that she can't keep from yelling out as she achieves four, five, six Os within the space of five minutes, she's begging, pleading to do whatever the guy wants to do (even if that would physically hurt any normal woman and in fact may be hurting the actress, who knows), she takes it everywhere, every way, etc...Meanwhile what the guy is doing is manipulating himself in increasingly specific "perfect" ways that a vagina can't emulate, on his own exact time, in his own exact way, without one millisecond of need for concern of pleasing anyone else (i.e. an actual woman physically being right there).
Meanwhile the guy can look like anything, he can have stinky breath, be a pregnancy-belly middle-aged dude with hair in his ears but his porno will never "turn him down," she's acting and she's trying to give the impression that she'd be turned on by any random dude watching the clip as well (i.e. the porn watcher subconsciously believes she's performing "for him" because no matter what he ACTUALLY looks, acts, smells, LOL like, THIS girl would beg him to do whatever he wanted to do...)
I don't know. It seems like for some men sex as compared to the extremely pinpointed, exacting and over-the-top-ness of porn just doesn't work after a while. How could actual sex with an actual woman, hell, even a paid one ever approach all of these factors combined?
Then after he's "done" the guy just literally has to press a button and she's gone. Talk about no responsibilities or expectations.
I'm not saying all that stuff is bad, everyone needs a release once in a while, just saying, it's a setup for expecting "real" sex to be a certain way that it can pretty much never be, so for SOME guys that may lead to impotence or at least difficulty when there's actually another person there.
p.s. Hope this wasn't too graphic. Wasn't really sure how else to explain it.
There's definitely some merit to this post, I mean it's much easier to rub one out flick off the power switch and go eat a sandwich.
They just ran a story on the news about this ...and about how many younger guys (and young as teenagers) are taking viagra as an aphrodisiac, and in many cases, using it as part of a cocktail of party drugs....i doubt porn has much to do with it...but either way, theres no point in stressing over it...pick up and try again with somebody else.
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