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We went from a society that disdained seeing symbols pinned to clothes to one that collects and wears them like badges.
You're not kidding! You think people would be ashamed to be chasing diagnoses instead of finding ways to improve their character and personality. Instead, it's don't blame me - I'm obviously deficient.
You're not kidding! You think people would be ashamed to be chasing diagnoses instead of finding ways to improve their character and personality. Instead, it's don't blame me - I'm obviously deficient.
Not any more ashamed than a dude with a broken leg going to a doctor to get it diagnosed and fixed. And just like someone who had a leg shattered, if they don't want to do the physical therapy afterwards, they will always have a weak leg.
People that wear their ADD/ADHD diagnosis like a label are the bane to the rest of us. Asking for a minor accommodation due to ADD from HR is career suicide. Generally it's small things, (please put meeting requests in outlook, when in a noisy area, I'd like to work with headphones on) so it's not anything ridiculous, but everyone has met that loudmouth, completely unaccountable and worthless dude that blames his entire world on ADD.
For over a decade I kept it hidden away. I was even too afraid to go to a support group in case I'd be seen attending there. Eventually I did, and one was awesome for ADD in the workplace, it was filled with other professionals and we could help one another with tough spots. We had common places where we'd get lost, we could benchmark different solutions with one another. There wasn't a single person there that told their workplace they had it.
The other was awful, and labeled as a support group only. It was larger and filled with people who had all sorts of problems, but chose to categorize them all under ADD. These were blamers and pity me types. I was so disgusted I had to leave halfway through and refused to return. There were a lot of people that were just so proud of their ADD there. A lot of..."they know I have ADD and they get mad when I don't take out the trash...." crap. Dude, the trash still needs to get taken out. How are you going to remember to get it out on time, even though it's more difficult for you. There wasn't any, "What do you do every day? Ok, between x and y, put a Thursday list...." I didn't here stories of even, "I tried this last week but it failed when..." Just complaining. Just angry that the world won't let them take that label and then cater to them out of pity.
That group sucks, and it sucks the worst for those that are finding ways forward. No medicine is going to fix unaccountable.
The worst is when that latter group gets to parents of kids that get diagnosed with it. I managed one clerk who was telling me of her problems for months. One day she said she wanted to give her child up for adoption. I had to break silence. She was stunned. How could the head of a finance department known for being calm and orderly possibly have this. I showed her my meds, many the same as her son was taken. I told her, it takes time, and effort, and it will not come overnight, but if you work on it your son, it will come. She quit shortly afterwards to work with him. Once in awhile she still calls for advice on certain things. He's doing well.
Meds allow you to be more attentive, and you need that attention to follow through with behavioral patterns and good habits. To be productive, you need both. The final step is in building good relationships. Tough to do when reliability is your weak point, but figuring out what conditions make you reliable and building that into your interactions are key.
Anyway, Hollytree, swinging back to point, we are deficient. To be productive, we'll need meds and some help. As we get good at knowing ourselves and how we work, we'll be very productive and unknown souls. The trick is getting the diagnosis and working through that without letting anyone else know. And it can be frustrating at times. Let the OP go get some help.
After I found out I was autistic.... I've accepted that I'm "weird" and people who point it out aren't really "out to get me." They are just noticing something odd and aren't really sure how to react to it. It's given me better understanding of my problems and possibly a chance to hold down a job for more than a few months
Contact someone on this website, or have your counselor--who does not appear to help you very much, from what you've written--get involved, and at least subscribe to this organization's newsletter. Possibly a group can help you with obtaining a job that's more suitable to your skills. https://www.autism-alabama.org/network-groups/
Mental health is the last arena where diagnosis and treatment are routinely belittled by certain circles. We don't tell diabetics to suck it up and just deal with their insulin imbalances, or tell people with high blood pressure that their circulatory systems really ought to start functioning correctly through sheer force of will and probably would if they weren't being so lazy. We don't tell Parkinson's and Alzheimer's patients that their condition was invented by money-grubbing pharmaceutical companies. Yet, there are those who consistently apply such responses to those whose with brain injury, those whose neurological functioning is impaired, those who have other neurotransmitter deficiencies, and those who take medication to counter symptoms of these sorts of issues. Regardless of the known biological bases of mental health issues, people continue to stigmatize.
Except that the full etiology of most mental illnesses really isn't understood and there is not a universal "magic pill" for it. And what makes a diagnosis "credible" in the eyes of many people is a mechanism that can be pointed to that is sufficiently unambiguous -- or at least a "simple fix" that usually works.
Mental illness is similar in some ways to the so-called "invisible illnesses" like Fibromyalgia; those who suffer from such illnesses often wish they had a missing leg or some kind of consistent physical anomaly at least that would show up on a CAT scan ("There it is! A fibromalgiablast right on the left kidney! And it's growing!"). Because without them, for many people, their disease is psychosomatic and their suffering is illegitimate and manufactured. Even people who are energetic and assertive and successful in life are thought to be malingerers once they succumb to one of those illnesses.
People want explicable and controllable illnesses because it helps them manage their own fears of sickness and death.
Mental illness has the additional burden of causing socially unacceptable or infuriating behaviors that are easy for people to want to turn away from.
None of which excuses attitudes toward the mentally ill, but it does explain a lot.
Autism is not mental illness, and neither is adhd.
And also, I actually have Fibromyalgia. Its caused by a deficiency in the kidney's ability to secrete phosphates, which then gets deposited in the joints, and eventually causes your body to lower the metabolism. Google St Amand and fibro.
I don't do salicylates, and I take guifennisen every day. And I don't take the stupid symptomatic meds the drug companies make many of which can be life threatening in their side effects.
My husband was seriously ill with anxiety and his eyes were tortured. There was no doubt about it. It was the psychotic type and consumed his life. Mine,too, to some extent. He didn't have to ask anyone if anything was wrong. There was no doubt. He ended up having electric shock treatments which helped to some extent. Once it started there was no getting rid of it.
A lot of people have some of certain ailments, but not enough to be diagnosed as having a specific thing. I have a little dyslexia, but am not dyslexic.
I have trouble multitasking, organizing, and completing tasks in a timely fashion at work. My desk is frequently a mess, and I live in a state of "organized chaos." I frequently daydream and have trouble budgeting my time, prioritizing, and sticking to a task long enough to get work done. I also just forget important stuff, like appointments, important dates and times, and daily tasks.
I've been screened for ADHD, and I have not been diagnosed with it, but I have other issues, too, so maybe those issues interfered with a proper diagnosis? I have ASD--a social communication disorder and an OCD--an obsessive thought disorder. The ASD and accompanying social anxiety make every day tasks, such as asking for help when I don't understand something, a struggle. The inattentiveness and daydreaming may be due to the OCD, but maybe there's another issue causing inattentiveness, too.
*OCD is an anxiety disorder characterized by a cycle of persistent negative thoughts (obsessions) that are dealt with by crippling repetitive rituals (compulsions); it is not a disorder where a person is overly neat-and-tidy; that's OCPD, which I can only wish I had. It bothers me when people tell me that I "don't have OCD" when I clearly do, just because I'm disorganized; OCD and OCPD are NOT the same thing!) My obsessions are not related to contamination in the least.
And this is called APD - Arrogance to change personality disorder...
because if you can write 2000x posts here in the forum and difficulty doing the rest. You like doing this because, it is easy and you can simply scroll through and switch from one forum to other..
Try exercise, god, family, sports...good luck..Dont fall for therapy or doctors. They are as broke as you are...
And this is called APD - Arrogance to change personality disorder...
because if you can write 2000x posts here in the forum and difficulty doing the rest. You like doing this because, it is easy and you can simply scroll through and switch from one forum to other..
Try exercise, god, family, sports...good luck..Dont fall for therapy or doctors. They are as broke as you are...
I meant if you could write informative posts here, you could change for the better. Just get more enthusiastic and break the habits...you ll be fine...
I'm not accusing you of anything. My point was that perhaps you're rushing to label yourself as having a diagnosable mental problem or disability when maybe you're perfectly normal.
The psychologist Joy Browne used to say that for most people they aren't truly lazy, because if they were offered a million dollars to do a task they were postponing, they'd hop to it. I can't know how real your problem is, but it seems possible that if the head of your company came and yelled at you and said you'd be fired if you didn't do a better job of keeping on top of things, you might find that you had some incentive to focus.
The OP has a long history of struggling with these issues.
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It bothers me when people tell me that I "don't have OCD" when I clearly do, just because I'm disorganized; OCD and OCPD are NOT the same thing!) My obsessions are not related to contamination in the least.
