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If you care too much about what others think of you, then you will drive yourself crazy trying to please everyone. And there's a good chance you'll please no one, at the end of the day, least of all yourself.
If you don't care AT ALL what other people think, then you can become insensitive, hurtful to others, a violator of the boundaries of others, and a generally disrespectful, empathy-lacking jerk.
This, in a nutshell.
I don't usually fully believe the bravado I see when someone posts (usually with lots of CAPS and exclamation points) that they don't care one iota what anyone thinks of them. But hey...if it's true...I doubt they have to worry too much about what people think if you get my drift.
I think it's smart and confident not to care. Do the right thing. Do your best.
One time I told my supervisor (whom I knew attended church) "I try to do my job to please God, then no one will have anything to say about it" Sort of meaning, I don't really worry about what others think because I'm doing my very best. Or something like that.
Those who are in my circle of friends receive a reciprocal regard on what they think,do or endeavor towards. It's one of the benefits of having friends,we tend to care and in return entrust them .
Do I care what my boss or stranger says on my actions or opinions...Rarely,since they really aren't in touch with my entire aptitude or general life choices. So for them I take it with little value. Respect it..For sure..but like most things..I consider the source and file 13 it.
You go through life worrying what other people think about you and as you get older, you realize that it's not about you and they don't think about you at all.
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”— Dr. Seuss
Is it psychologically healthy to have no concern what-so-ever how people view you? Or is there some sort of psychological benefit to caring about what people think about you?
I think your question is a bit simplistic. Are we talking about what people think of you on a superficial level, or of what they think of your character?
Do I care if people think I don't like the most popular TV show, wear the newest clothes, have the prettiest face or the fittest body? Nope, not at all.
But...and this is an important but...I do care if a large number of people who know me think that I am unkind, inconsiderate, cruel, or willfully ignorant. I care because if enough think it, they might be right, and I very much don't want to be any of those things, not because other people dislike those qualities, but because I dislike them.
I think your question is a bit simplistic. Are we talking about what people think of you on a superficial level, or of what they think of your character?
Do I care if people think I don't like the most popular TV show, wear the newest clothes, have the prettiest face or the fittest body? Nope, not at all.
But...and this is an important but...I do care if a large number of people who know me think that I am unkind, inconsiderate, cruel, or willfully ignorant. I care because if enough think it, they might be right, and I very much don't want to be any of those things, not because other people dislike those qualities, but because I dislike them.
Hope this makes sense, and is helpful.
Yes. This precisely.
Some of the people I've heard protest the most loudly that they didn't care one bit what anyone thought of them, or said "I am who I am, take it or leave it" and such things, also acted so crude, violent, or disrespectful of others in general around them... I guess it's fine they don't care what anybody thinks, since most folks around them think they are trash, because of how they act.
The kinds of behaviors I've seen (and frankly, judged) from those who love to say, "I don't care what anybody thinks!":
- Drug and alcohol abuse
- Yelling profanity in public
- Violent behavior
- Driving like a jerk
- Dragging around dirty crying children and screaming at them in public
- Letting their kids act like little feral beasts in public and not correcting or controlling them
- Being an irresponsible pet owner, with animals that are abused, neglected, not cleaned up after, hoarded, let to roam, or tied in the yard, etc.
- Violating the space and boundaries of other people, especially while drunk
- Being generally disrespectful to others around them
- Being unhygienic
The list could just go on, and on and on. And right after hollering about how little they care about what anybody thinks, that same person will then talk about how awful everyone else around them is that they are judged unfairly and don't get the same good life as others. Whether they don't get a good job, or they don't get a date.
Maybe try caring just a bit what other people think, if you want them to respond positively to you? Hey. Just a thought.
Does that mean we have to be obsessed with having the perfect body, latest fashion, most ambitious career, biggest house, biggest truck, or whatever, to impress people? No. I'm just talking about basic decency here.
As for impressing God and not worrying about what other people think, please tell me you're not the coal rolling d-bag with the Jesus stickers who cut off 3 lanes of traffic and almost killed half a dozen people during my commute yesterday...
I think I'd want to know what people think of me because it may be the only way to see something that you're doing wrong that you feel is perfectly fine. How do we grow if we don't utilize constructive criticism? So yes, I do care about what people think of me in that respect.
Some people are motivated by what will make them most acceptable to others; others , like me, by whatever I feel is right or true, regardless of whether or not others approve of it. I'm hurt and sad when people don't like me, but am never tempted to compromise my values and alter my behavior to change it. Is that 'psychologically healthy' or not? Yes or no, it is what it is...
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