Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
And there's only been a realistic choice not to have them for some women in some areas for a few decades. Of course the perception is that everyone does it and ? everyone should.
Where is this? My great X2 aunt was a physician in the early 1900's & never had kids. Doing genealogy research means I've read decades of archived news reports that contained information about my family & believe me; Aunt Amy was a non-issue.
During the late 1800's another great aunt was a university professor & she never had kids either. Same thing; nobody burned at the stake.
What does a realistic choice even mean? Maybe most women WANTED kids because unless you arrived here on a slave-traders boat; women have ALWAYS had choices.
Just because nobody remembers them 100 years later because they never left a living legacy doesn't mean they never existed.
I remember them now because I'm a genealogy nerd & I looked for them. Everyone would find women like this in their family tree if they bothered to look. Whoever inspired the changes several decades ago to convince women who were mothers that they were 'less than' are the ones with the warped perspective. Not the mothers & not the women who were not.
If anyone hassles you, just say "I was born without the maternal gene".
I'm childless by choice and was never hassled, in fact, there was some wistful envy. Most said "Good for you". When I accidently got pregnant, I lined up an adoption right away (but then miscarried).
At 40, Downs' and other problems crop up too---more frequently.
Even my nieces and nephews seem like exotic species to me, LOL.
You're not considering the sustainability of increasing the human population. Climate change is happening, and what kind of world and struggle with babies born today have as the earth becomes less hospitable?
OMG!!!
Climate change is cyclical and a natural occurrence. 50 years ago people were screaming of global freeze.
You wont help the overpopulation either as those who are populating the planet keep having more and more children.
What you will have is regret as you get older and a lonely life filled with what you think are friends, hobbies or work. In reality your friends are mere acquaintances, your hobbies will become a nuisance as you will only have yourself to share them with and work is nothing anybody thinks proud of on their deathbed.
I say western women were duped into a life of making choices that most of them if not all regret when they get older.
I would never want to have a child just to have a child. If that makes any sense, because I believe some women just weren’t meant to be mothers, and that should be OK. Being a parent is very difficult and the biggest commitment of a lifetime, I just don’t think I’m capable of that. I don’t have the patience or the money LOL
But then again all that can change when you do become apparent, many people say that you will change for the better because of the love you have for your child
I don’t know it’s all kind of confusing, I want to go back to when I was comfortable with my decision
My best friend is 13 yrs. younger than me. She and her husband went back and forth whether they should have a child or not, and for about a year, they tried. She had to go off her seizure meds to try and get pregnant, which caused some seizures to come back, and so they quit trying to have a baby. And truthfully, they're both fine with it.
At the time, they were kind of having marriage problems, and HE wanted a baby more than she did, so she tried. It didn't work out, and they're fine.
I am a mom to 3 grown men. Let me tell you, you never stop worrying about them and for them, etc. You're happy when they're happy, but when there are problems, it weighs on you in a way you will never have to experience unless you want to OP.
There is NO shame in NOT having children. You're life isn't pointless or meaningless if you're child-free...unless you want it to be. Having children brings a whole hella lot of joy. For sure. But it brings sadness and heartbreak often enough, as well.
But...seems to me, you need to own your decision, whichever way you go.
There is NO shame in NOT having children. You're life isn't pointless or meaningless if you're child-free...unless you want it to be. Having children brings a whole hella lot of joy. For sure. But it brings sadness and heartbreak often enough, as well.
Exactly this. And then when there are grandchildren, you worry about them as well.
I never wanted children and made up my mind - at age 8 - to avoid getting pregnant. As a child, I was bullied very badly by others, and it made me dislike kids. As I grew into adolescence, the teasing got worse. I despised my fellow teenagers. Even when I met a guy I thought I wanted to marry, having children didn't cross my mind (though he often talked about my having 'his son'). When I reached my late 30s, I sort of felt regretful - for a few hours. Now I'm almost half a century old, and I do not regret never becoming a mother. I'm just not maternal, and I'm sure the bullying I experienced as a kid had a lot to do with my anti child stance.
Thats interesting. I had a similar childhood, but I still wanted kids. Now at 50, not gonna happen. I have a lot of regret.
Again, you are telling a woman she SHOULD have children, regardless of how she feels about it. No one should have a child because society tells them to. They should do it because it's what they WANT. Period.
OMG!!!
Climate change is cyclical and a natural occurrence. 50 years ago people were screaming of global freeze.
You wont help the overpopulation either as those who are populating the planet keep having more and more children.
What you will have is regret as you get older and a lonely life filled with what you think are friends, hobbies or work. In reality your friends are mere acquaintances, your hobbies will become a nuisance as you will only have yourself to share them with and work is nothing anybody thinks proud of on their deathbed.
I say western women were duped into a life of making choices that most of them if not all regret when they get older.
So much wrong here but I will say it's been my experience that very few women who have chosen not to have children regret that choice when they're older.
If you don't want children OP don't have them. It's not a rule that you must reproduce and having children doesn't automatically make your life better or more meaningful. It does for some but not for everyone. People should make the choices that are right for them.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
but I will say it's been my experience that very few women who have chosen not to have children regret that choice when they're older. 
