Why do so many people dismiss the struggles of unattractive women? (gambler, mentally)
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I don't care about height either. Not too tall has always been my bag. (Under 6 feet and actually shorter than that.) As for looks, I care more about personality: curiosity, integrity and kindness over looks. And a sense of humor and class.
As for my own height, I always wished I was taller.
I don't care about height either. Not too tall has always been my bag. (Under 6 feet and actually shorter than that.) As for looks, I care more about personality: curiosity, integrity and kindness over looks. And a sense of humor and class.
As for my own height, I always wished I was taller.
Nah, if you knew what it was like to shop for clothing, you wouldn't.
And yes, I am well past 40, by more than 20 years.
I just remember being a "Medium" in Everything: medium height, medium weight, medium feet, medium hands... Medium Everything! Got to the store and they were almost always out of Medium!! grrrrr
A lot of people out there think a woman has an easier time finding a romantic partner regardless of looks and the answer is no. There is a lot of gas lighting of women who find ourselves unattractive too, we are told we don't look as bad as we think. The reality is that life is not fair and some women get a ridiculously bad hand when it comes to appearance.
Hi, I too am not considered attractive like the kind you see in movies where a guy sees a pretty girl and wants to date her. I have the understanding that men are visual and they cant help but pick someone pretty (most of the time). I've been at the lunch table with fellow students and i really had a crush on this one guy but the pretty girl in front of me caught his eye. I knew i had lost him as he had no interest in me, in fact, i could tell he had platonic friendship feelings for me. Very nice to me, but not romantically.
Guess the only thing to do which people have had to do was have a good personality. ha! just like the old saying when describing a not-pretty person "She has a nice personality".
I realize that I never had someone chase after me in my whole life like you see in movies where the guy pursues a very beautiful woman, even after she keeps turning the guy down. I guess this happens in real life.. I have never had anyone do that to me.
Now I am older and I wonder what that life could have been like if i were pretty. I suppose even pretty girls have problems - amazingly - they do get sick of guys hitting on them constantly. Which can be annoying.
So the only thing i can say to you is, i guess do whatever else makes you happy. Be pretty in other ways than just looks. As for your hair, i dont know what to do other than go to a professional salon and see what they can suggest. If anyone knows, it would be them. And not your $5 haircut place.. but a real salon. you might need to have shorter hair to control it.
I asked for empathy, not sympathy (those are different things). What I am tired of is the ''disbelief'' about the experiences ugly women. A lot of people don't even want to admit ugly women exist at all. The gas lighting thing is the belief that it all must stem from low self esteem as opposed to physicality.
The reality is ugly women do exist and so do ugly men. But folks have never heard our side - they hear about the male incels but never us. Few ugly women choose bitterness overall. Some do but not as many as the men as ugly males arguably use the incel communities as a coping mechanism over their looks.
A broader conversation needs to be had about looks in general. Society definitely over values it.
It may be because some men assume that women tend to have a lot of tools to make themselves more attractive, such as makeup, weave, wigs, etc. Weight may be an issue, but I guess some people feel that, generally speaking, weight can be lost.
I do feel for any women who are considered physically unattractive. I would "like" to think that many, if not most or all, women can still do things to make themselves reasonably attractive to the right people, but whether or not that is actually true or simply idealism, who knows? I really do think that a lot of women can probably make themselves attractive enough for some men. They may not be the "top notch" men, but I do think that some women if they were to take care of themselves might be able to attract some men either way. At least, I would like to think that.
Well, you may "feel" that any woman could lose weight if she wanted to and "like to think" that any woman can make herself attractive if she just tries, but that's not necessarily reality. I do believe those are common misconceptions, however.
Well, you may "feel" that any woman could lose weight if she wanted to and "like to think" that any woman can make herself attractive if she just tries, but that's not necessarily reality. I do believe those are common misconceptions, however.
Losing weight might be hard, no doubt. Aside from that though, do you think that make up, makeovers, different hairstyles, etc. could improve a woman’s appearance to a significant degree?
Losing weight might be hard, no doubt. Aside from that though, do you think that make up, makeovers, different hairstyles, etc. could improve a woman’s appearance to a significant degree?
You might have seen too many movies where an already beautiful actress is "uglied" up and then becomes lovely when she takes her glasses off and stops wearing overalls.
Losing weight might be hard, no doubt. Aside from that though, do you think that make up, makeovers, different hairstyles, etc. could improve a woman’s appearance to a significant degree?
Just my observation in this bustling, superficial, big city I live in - With the attractive women it's all makeup, hair, clothes, and accessories. And they admit to constantly watching their weight.
Such pressure to live up to society's unrealistic standards of beauty. It's a curse.
As we age, metabolism slows. Menopause messes with our hormones. Insulin resistance is a thing. If we've a genetic predisposition to weight gain, it usually rears its head in our middle- older years. Some who have always been naturally thin now pack on the pounds and find that nothing they do can get rid of it and keep it off. Conversely, some are blessed to be congenitally and forever thin no matter what they eat, while others literally have to starve themselves in order to remain thin. Some choose to and others don't. But those who are naturally thin or naturally have scant appetites seem to have little understanding that losing weight can be nearly impossible over a certain age.
At any rate, being overweight doesn't appear in any definition of "frumpy" that I've ever read.
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grrrrr 
