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About the only thing you can do is not enable him to use slurs around you by accepting it. Yes I understand his anger and hatred but that doesn’t mean it’s acceptable to use slurs.
Other than that leave it alone unless he is making the Vietnamese man suffer.
I don't think your first point will work, telling Luke it is unacceptable to OP will just have Luke walking away, madder, sadder. A man holding anger for 50 years, who suffered in Vietnam, who came home to no help, no praise, sever PTSD is not going to respond to someone who says "that's not acceptable". We haven't been in Luke's shoes, so Leave it Alone!
I'd also ask that we not use "Luke" to refer to the Viet guy in question, since that's part of the slur.
Vietnam vets are complicated, because they weren't fighting for a noble cause and were exploited by the government. But, not all veterans are heroes, and it's okay to call out racism.
I'd also ask that we not use "Luke" to refer to the Viet guy in question, since that's part of the slur.
Vietnam vets are complicated, because they weren't fighting for a noble cause and were exploited by the government. But, not all veterans are heroes, and it's okay to call out racism.
Oh geeze, you are right. I just realized that. Sorry. No they are not all heroes, but to call out racism when you live next to the guy, I don't know how that would work. Triggering a vet with a word or action probably isn't recommended.
I'd also ask that we not use "Luke" to refer to the Viet guy in question, since that's part of the slur.
Vietnam vets are complicated, because they weren't fighting for a noble cause and were exploited by the government. But, not all veterans are heroes, and it's okay to call out racism.
I thought it might be his real name, just a rhyming coincidence but yeah it's probably made up.
I still would not get the vet going by saying anything, it could be triggering since he's already stressed. I'd let him stew and talk about other things if OP sees him.
Oh geeze, you are right. I just realized that. Sorry. No they are not all heroes, but to call out racism when you live next to the guy, I don't know how that would work. Triggering a vet with a word or action probably isn't recommended.
It doesn't have to be a soap-box-y thing, more like, "Come, on. Lay off Ahn, he's a nice guy." There's no need to start a fight, but letting the guy know that his commentary isn't welcome and setting the boundary that you don't want to hear it.
It doesn't have to be a soap-box-y thing, more like, "Come, on. Lay off Ahn, he's a nice guy." There's no need to start a fight, but letting the guy know that his commentary isn't welcome and setting the boundary that you don't want to hear it.
And others might say similar to the Vet not knowing he's a Vet. "Sir, I would ask you not to speak to him like that," or "Not to speak of him like that in my presence.". In short, others might stand up for the other guy.
And where it might go from there, we-ll, in my case, if an objection came, it would be is "All I can do is ask you." BUT what if it goes past that, if push comes to shove and the person standing up for the other is someone who could clobber, ER or the morgue, the Vet?
Long story short of it, how would one feel then about a situation they might have diffused very early but did not for whatever reason?
I'm a Vietnam vet.
Personally, I doubt very much if the subject's experiences are the cause of his issues. He's just ignorant. He's always been that way, and no one is going to change him. It's what makes him feel powerful. He enjoys it when people attempt to correct him.
"Who's gonna stop me?" was stenciled in his brain when he was born.
I'd also ask that we not use "Luke" to refer to the Viet guy in question, since that's part of the slur.
Vietnam vets are complicated, because they weren't fighting for a noble cause and were exploited by the government. But, not all veterans are heroes, and it's okay to call out racism.
When you have been shot at, had your friends killed and some tortured and murdered as POWs, then you can call it out. You are being pretty self-righteous. He just needs to be encouraged to tone it down.
About the only thing you can do is not enable him to use slurs around you by accepting it. Yes I understand his anger and hatred but that doesn’t mean it’s acceptable to use slurs.
Other than that leave it alone unless he is making the Vietnamese man suffer.
I agree. He needs to stop with the epithets.
Quote:
Originally Posted by mustangman66
About 15 years ago I was in Hawaii with the military and we had some down time so we went over to Pearl Harbor and and that time there were still survivors that were there telling stories, sharing books they had written, etc.. We were in uniform and we started talking to one of them and he just was so excited. We kept telling him we had to get back to work but he just kept talking and finally we asked for a picture with him and he was more than happy to. After we got the picture a Japanese tourist came up and tried talking to him and asked for a picture as well and he refused to talk or to get a picture and walked away. We actually thought it was pretty funny but it just goes to show you how something that had such a profound effect on you at a young age can last a lifetime. He completely shut down when that tourist came over to him.
Let me counter that with a happier story. When I lived in Hawaii back in 1991, my parents came to visit me. My father was a WWII veteran, but he fought in Europe.
On the flight from LA, they were seated next to a Japanese man who was about my father's age. The man spoke to them in broken English and gave my father a small figurine, a turtle. My parents didn't fully understand, but my father said he felt like the man was trying to offer friendship. I had already been living in Hawaii for about four months when my parents came to visit so I understood just a smidge of Japanese culture. The turtle was to wish my father good luck and a long life.
When I took my parents to Pearl Harbor to visit the USS Arizona and museum, there were a lot of Japanese tourists. To a one, the older men who looked about my father's age all stopped and studied my father and exchanged nods with him, and the women would look at my mother, and she at them. (My mother, though of Italian descent, looked like a native Hawaiian, enough so that when my parents got off the plane, the women who put leis around their necks greeted her as an elder.) It was something to behold. It was like they were seeing one another's humanity for the first time. Later my father said, "Maybe they were wondering if we shot at each other 50 years ago."
I don't know how it might have gone down between my father and Germans, though. Neither he nor any of his friends ever bought a German car.
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