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What could change literally overnight? Furthermore, are you allowed to be rude and impolite whenever the mood hits you?
You have no idea what could change overnight. You are really basing this whole thing on the fact that they did not visit you or wish you happy holidays (in August???) for a day?
What could change overnight:
-They are busy
-They lost a loved one
-They were diagnosed with a bad disease
-Business trip
-Work stress (home, but focused on that)
-They finally found good pizza in Raleigh
-Marriage issues
-etc....
Your OP:
Quote:
How common is it in the area for friends+neighbors to suddenly shun you after a few years of (apparent) friendship? I mean TOTALLY shun. No hello. No holiday greetings. No visits. No nothing. Abruptly, for no apparent reason.
When things happen "overnight", either there was an "event" and you need to figure out what it was:
-You think you don't complain to them, but actually you do
-They read CD and figured out who you are
-They got together and conspired to blame you for the lack of good pizza in Cary
-You otherwise upset them and just don't realize it.
<<<<OR>>>>
If it was that abrupt, the whole thing is in your head, and if you go out tomorrow, or the next day, or soon, you will realize that they are all fine, and will tell you hello.
Just out of curiosity, when you say "shun", do you mean that you waive with a big fat smile on your face, they look you dead in the eye and turn their back on you? Or do you mean that they are just not beating down your doors to wish you happy holidays (in August)?
Have you considered bringing them some pizza as an olive branch?
The town of Cary has gotten together and your name came up and they decided to be rude to you to see if you would notice!
So, you really can't blame the neighbors. They were told to drop you like a hot potato!
We don't roll like that, here in North Raleigh, because we know that in the phone book, Cary is listed as CRY.
CRY = Can't Afford Raleigh Yet!
This has been entertaining and when I get back...rep points for all of you for making me laugh when I know I gotta go out in this 100 degree weather! For those of you that have homes on the market, if you a/c is not on, buyers will be in and out in less than 5 minutes!!! And, setting your thermostat at 85 degrees does not count as being ON!
Ugh! When we were shopping for homes, if we walked in to an occupied home and it was stifling hot, we left.
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This is really more about "people in general" than anything local, but since the thread has gone to 5 pages now (maybe that was your goal all along?) :
People almost never change behavior from friendly to "Shun" OVERNIGHT unless something fairly big has changed. Sounds like they found out something about you that bothers/offends them. I don't know what that could be, but that's the only kind of thing that causes people to switch the way they relate to you so fast.
This is really more about "people in general" than anything local, but since the thread has gone to 5 pages now (maybe that was your goal all along?) :
People almost never change behavior from friendly to "Shun" OVERNIGHT unless something fairly big has changed. Sounds like they found out something about you that bothers/offends them. I don't know what that could be, but that's the only kind of thing that causes people to switch the way they relate to you so fast.
It's not about Cary, it's about you, somehow.
When I say overnight, I mean literally overnight. This involves my extended family, not just me. Are they all offensive too?
When I say overnight, I mean literally overnight. This involves my extended family, not just me. Are they all offensive too?
Did one of you recently get arrested for something scandalous?
Does your extended family live near you, or do you mean they came to visit and your neighbors didn't talk to them either?
Because that seems normal enough... if they're not talking to you, they're not going to strike up convos with your family.
I think maybe you need to be VERY specific about instances of this shunning behavior if you want any sort of help here deciphering it at all.
I mean... VERY SPECIFIC.
As in:
"My neighbor always waves and says hello when I'm out watering my petunias, but last week, he didn't wave or say hello and every time I wave he turns his back on me and every time I say hello he gives me the side eye.
The other day, my cousin came over and said hello to my neighbor and he gave her the side eye, too."
This is the sort of detail that is required.
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When I say overnight, I mean literally overnight. This involves my extended family, not just me. Are they all offensive too?
This doesn't add up. When you say Shunned, are you implying that you expect contact from neighbors every day? And I still don't get the Holiday reference. If it happened "litterally" overnight, then that just doesn't make sense. I think you are over-reading this.
FWIW, don't move to Chatham County. If you do, you'd have to change your name from ContainedInCary to ShunnedInShakori....
Now I'm convinced it must be the fault of Cary itself. Something in that towns water supply most likely. I would get out of there as soon as you can. Run, don't walk...
If I had every neighbor coming by to say hi to me "litterally" every day, I'd be a bitter person....
According to Webster's, it is now acceptable to use "literally" when you mean "figuratively". Go figure.
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