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So... I need some helpful input. I'm hoping, although it may be a leap, this thread does not become one of "bashing!" I've seen some very helpful and insightful comments on other threads, so I'm hoping to get a new perspective, an outside perspective... humor me while you read please...
Backstory - My husband and I moved from Miami to a little town in eastern NC in 2003. In 12 years, we got married (he was my bf at the time of the move), I went back to college and finished, he found a career in Pharmaceutical Manufacturing which he enjoys, and we are new grandparents (too young to be LOL)..
Miami has changed so much, and managed to be the Forbes worst place to raise a family, so that's not an option anymore. I hear from my Raleigh friends that its a great place to raise a family, and its the Forbes #2 place in finding a job.
This small town hasn't been terrible, that would be an unfair statement. In the big scheme of things, we grew up and got our "stuff" together. We are now both 39 and need a change. As far as children, we have "his, mine and ours." His two are 17 and 20, mine is now 20 and has a little family of her own. And ours... she's our "do-over"... our world... our ray of sunshine (yep, just a little spoiled), our 8 year old.
Our now dilemma: In the last 3 years, I've been a little unhappy with where we're living. Besides the typical small town, nothing to do, its also a bit more... I still don't feel connected, I don't feel like I'm home. And I'm not entirely happy with our school system. Both, for myself as a teacher, and for my daughter as a 2nd grader!
Although this town has grown immensely in the last 12 years, its still years behind... Until I moved here, I never cared about the fact that I was a white hispanic or that my husband was black. He didn't either. He's actually a black hispanic, and even with the "new" forms for desegregated data, that doesn't seem to exist.. LOL...
In the last 2 months my husband has been laid off (and is having trouble finding a new job), and I've learned that my little girl was "grouped" by her peers from day one... None of the little "entitled white girls" will even talk to her, so she's decided that she'll be friends with the only girls that will... Unfortunately, this town is full of stereotypical races! I hate that! It's so sad that I don't even know how to raise my child to not care, and pick her friends carefully, because my husband and I never had to worry about this as children! In my own classroom, I do not tolerate any type of 'belittling" slurs (whether its about race, gender, ethnicity, sexual orientation), even if made jokingly!
If you've gotten this far, thank you for humoring me!
We need a change. I want a more diverse area for my daughter that will be a healthy environment for her. Where people of all races and ethnicities are professional white collar or industrial blue collar workers and don't fit into a stereotypical box. She's not black, she's not white, she's not hispanic... She's multi-racial!
We plan on renting... maybe for the rest of our lives... I've heard that the outskirts of Raleigh are better because the schools have more of a community feel (not bussed from all around), and I've heard to stay out of South and East Raleigh...?? Can anyone provide more information... specific areas...? What about schools? I'm a secondary Math Teacher and I expect critical thinking skills in my classroom, which is not a favorite among students or their entitled parents...
And...no to mention that fact that I feel like I've become very cynical in the last couple of years, and its not like me at all!!!
Last edited by MissCityLife; 04-09-2015 at 09:38 PM..
I think there are many areas that will fit your daughter's needs, but there is, IMHO, one overriding issue that needs to be determined first: Where will your husband be working?
I think there are many areas that will fit your daughter's needs, but there is, IMHO, one overriding issue that needs to be determined first: Where will your husband be working?
He's sending resumes to all suitable openings in the Raleigh and surrounding areas... My daughter's school and the community feel (that is the one thing that I do like about this town, is the community feel in the middle and high schools, because there are only 3), takes precedence. Neither one of us minds driving in traffic to work, as we feel we can easily get used to it again because we did it for so long in Miami.
So this unexpected lay off is either going to be a blessing in disguise or just the proverbial monkey wrench!
Hey, I'm feeling cynical about NC lately and I feel your pain.
First, the job. Then, the place. That's how I got here from New Orleans.
My diverse area of North Raleigh accepts everyone regardless of ethnicity and I've rented in Raleigh over 26 years.
Do take into account the rapid rise in rents because of the influx of highly paid professionals. This may no longer fit your budget.
Best wishes to your family.
Thank you! Its a lot harder now thinking about a relocation!! It was so much easier 12 years when I was fearless and left with my, then 8 year old, and what fit in my car... LOL
I think we would have to rent to start with. I would love to find an older couple or family that wants to rent their house (for years, and years...) to a family that's "starting over"... You wouldn't happen to know any, would you??...
Do you mind telling us what town you live in now? Might help put some things in context for us. There certainly are pharmaceutical manufacturing firms in the area.
Thank you! Its a lot harder now thinking about a relocation!! It was so much easier 12 years when I was fearless and left with my, then 8 year old, and what fit in my car... LOL
I think we would have to rent to start with. I would love to find an older couple or family that wants to rent their house (for years, and years...) to a family that's "starting over"... You wouldn't happen to know any, would you??...
Hey, I did that when I was single and lived in NYC Metro (1969).
Put what i needed in the cargo area of my 64 Corvette and went to Los Angeles to start over.
Hope you can find a rental fitting your budget. Beware of numerous fraudulent home rental ads on Craigslist. Remember, if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.
Home rentals normally require high deposits. Apartment complexes ask much less.
Look at rental prices on the web. My community, Northridge Crossings, is in North Raleigh and is a nice diverse residence. Their rates might help with pricing research although most of the brand new complexes are much higher for way fewer square feet. Also consider utilities. Water bills are quite costly. Electric/gas are normal.
Not surprising to hear that ENC hasn't made many strides in recent years. The only town that has seen growth is Greenville and that is primarily due to the university. With stagnating economies and less than stellar attitudes I don't think its going to get better within your time frame.
I think you're right on track to seek out areas with more professional, educated colored people. If you must stay in the state, Raleigh or Charlotte might represent an improvement but I would look outside the region as well.
As far as the pharmaceutical job market, I tell people to hold on! It's going to be a bumpy ride.. Since your husband's younger he might want to seek other fields with transferable skill sets.
Poppydog, I live in Wilson... almost dead center between greenville and raleigh...
Saturnfan, We really like the North Raleigh area, but I would like to see other areas as well. My number 1 most important would be that the school my daughter attends isn't going to change every year, and there's a community feel. I hear that some of the outskirts of Raleigh are like that because they're not really in the city... and a neighborhood with kids that my daughter can play with, and friendly neighbors. Along with that, would have to be our budget... its no secret what I make because I'm a teacher, so my income is $37K. My husband was making $20 an hour, but that all depends on the new job he finds. And commuting for him won't be a factor. Being from Miami, and visiting often, traffic or long drives don't bother us.
RomanRebel... did you really write "educated colored people"... I'm not offended, and my husband wouldn't be either, it was just funny to me to read that. I hope this doesn't come out wrong... I'm not saying I want to live in either a "white" neighborhood or "black" neighborhood... I'm hoping its a neighborhood that's not necessarily characterized by that (is that a stretch?), and I want my daughter to see people of all races and ethnicities on "career day" or "college day" at her school... not just the stereotypical "Banking Pencil Pushers" who are white, and the stereotypical "Blue Collar grunt workers" who are black.
What do you mean by "bumpy ride?" I don't think my husband's "younger" when talking about employability skills.. With 12 years experience in Pharmaceutical Manufacturing, why would anyone want to start over in a different field? Yea, take what he can in the meantime, but not long term... He is not the portfolio worker of today. He was hoping that he found a company that he would stay with until the day he retires...
So what outskirts of Raleigh offer the more "community feel" in schools? Where is it that the boundaries rarely change?
He's sending resumes to all suitable openings in the Raleigh and surrounding areas... My daughter's school and the community feel (that is the one thing that I do like about this town, is the community feel in the middle and high schools, because there are only 3), takes precedence. Neither one of us minds driving in traffic to work, as we feel we can easily get used to it again because we did it for so long in Miami.
So this unexpected lay off is either going to be a blessing in disguise or just the proverbial monkey wrench!
Any job he finds in the Triangle area will land you in a city/town that is preferable to Wilson.
I think what RR was trying to say is that there is a disproportionately high level of black people in Eastern NC who lack education beyond high school, and you're more likely to find a community that suits your mixed race family among people who have overall higher levels of education, particularly black families who have higher levels of education.
Personally, I think the education comment applies in a general sense, regardless of race.
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