Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I am 40, single, trans person, clean, quiet, no pets, no drama if possible, in Columbia SC at the time but I find its not a place to build anything long term or meet connections. Its a bit too old south for my liking but of course they'll say its making strides, I just don't see it though, at least not enough for me.
At least I know in Raleigh that it is making strides as a place and area, to meet more open minded folks. The reception of the 2 places is just so opposite. Anytime I talked to anyone in Raleigh, its considered cool if someones a trans person.
In Columbia its the opposite with everyone I talked to. They're a lot more put off by it in SC's capitol city and even if a few trans people exist, they're mean people and don't give others a chance. You have to live like right in Downtown to get any benefits from going to any LGBTQ center or events. If you don't live in the main neighborhood its a lot tougher where as Raleigh, I see it to be more widespread with acceptance and might even go to the suburbs a little bit, even if not all the way. Just more than it does here is all I am asking for.
I mean how hard is it to have resources in almost all neighborhoods within a 20 mile radius? Or to just be able to put out an ad, write someone and not get so much resistance, even if PRO LGBT stuff is not plastered all over the place but at least where you will have less problems with private interaction as well. I don't need flags being up everywhere either because then people will be trying to prove too much on the outside, to be superficial. I am still conservative enough to where I feel less BLM signs and LGBTQ acceptance signs should be up on peoples lawns to make a point. Action is the difference. I am really a moderate in all actuality.
In SC I had the KKK write me when I was being too vocal about it when I would post ads. I'm so not joking. Or at the very least it was a KKK supporter. IN COLUMBIA.
Now that brings my attention to Greensboro. Greensboro I hear mixed things like they're making strides to get better, but its still taking too long there as well. Also when I look under housing, I see hardly any ads, not as many as the Tampa area or in Raleigh, not even naming Atlanta or Charlotte which both of those I don't want to go to. I hear some saying how they even like Columbia better than Greensboro but most things say its making more strides, then some say crime is high, the winter ice storms are worse, its still inland. Same with Winston Salem.
Now the Triad is one big area that seems like a big nothing, possibly a waste of time and where I won't save money like you'd initially think. These so called "cheap" places are not cheap and they're colder, thats the point I am making and am probably better off in Raleigh eating the so called extra cost, and who knows I might even get lucky in a way I won't in the forementioned cities.
I am skipping Greenville and Charleston as well. SC seems like its all the same, too back in time, very few options etc. You initially think its cute until you start seeing the problems socially plus more people are in poverty in their homes in SC too. Less visible homeless, but many seem house poor kind of thing. Charleston also seems more expensive than Raleigh out of the 2. Even if they're the same still, more options in Raleigh. I have Durham off the list. won't be moving to Durham or the likelihood is good that I won't because I don't like mask mandates throughout one city, thats highly unconstitutional and I don't wanna be around those people.
So just let me know of some possible leads I could get going on to help me transition into living in Raleigh better. I have someone already willing to rent to me thats a high likelihood..
The one bad thing is this though, I had to cut loose the main connection I had in the Raleigh area because she ended up being unreliable in the end and slighting our friendship. I came across her on the internet though so maybe it was BS the whole time anyways.
I need new friends, I need to build something, I am not getting any younger, and why not try in the place with the most opportunities that I can find instead of being in some backwater in the deep south constantly struggling and not even saving the money that I thought I would save by picking the less expensive places. I just want things more chill, even if I have to pay a little more this time. And who knows I might not have to in the end.
I have a shot at a 500 per month place in Raleigh where I am sharing it with the home owner. Thats less than anything I found in Columbia under the same arrangement.. think I am kidding?? Sometimes these so called cheaper places end up costing more. I can't imagine Alabama. God. If I have to I might even risk taking a trip to see the place prior to moving in it if I feel its serious enough. I just have no options where I am, its so tough to meet people even in a smaller city with 135,000. I have lived in bigger metros before as well and it feels no different to me.
When I get excited I tend to write a lot but try the best you can to respond, thanks.
I'm excited for you and I think you would be quite happy here. I have two trans friends in the Raleigh-Durham area. One in their 30s and another in their 50s. Both are doing quite well and are having happy, healthy lives in the Triangle.
.
I have Durham off the list. won't be moving to Durham or the likelihood is good that I won't because I don't like mask mandates throughout one city, thats highly unconstitutional and I don't wanna be around those people.
Then you'll wanna take Raleigh off your list - it will probably be a few days, but they will follow durham (just like Orange and Chatham counties already have).
If mask mandates eliminate an area for you, you'll be crossing off most of the other 25+ cities you've asked about on CD.
Yeah. Look at Florida and Texas if you don't like mask mandates. There are plenty of cities in each state where a "moderate" trans person would be welcomed.
The Triangle/Raleigh is not for you if you don't like masks and BLM signs.
Then you'll wanna take Raleigh off your list - it will probably be a few days, but they will follow durham (just like Orange and Chatham counties already have).
If mask mandates eliminate an area for you, you'll be crossing off most of the other 25+ cities you've asked about on CD.
No, you're not.
Oh I missed that sentence in the wall of text. Yeah OP is not going to like our area at all if masks get under their skin. I find it surprising if the OP isn't accepting of something like that when they identify as a "moderate" trans.
Raleigh I would think is better. But Greensboro is extremely accepting and tolerant. Only getting better as time goes on... the snowflakes who get offended by trans folk are slowly dwindling away/being written off. And those who associate with the snowflakes/bigots don't really do so much anymore as it is a huge liability to be associated with those types of people in 2021.
Also, keep in mind, Raleigh is one of the most diverse and accepting metropolitan areas in the country. If someone did make a comment in a derogatory way, they will most likely be outvoiced at a ratio of 5:1. I know that trans people love Raleigh/Durham, and I know it is an accepting community where you can thrive better. Of course, there will be intolerant snowflakes.. but that does not represent the overall feel of Raleigh. Greensboro too. I feel like the inner core of Greensboro is slightly more tolerant/prideful than Raleigh as a whole... but if you go out a few miles. idk. But Greensboro is accepting and awesome for a city it's size.
Of course, there will be intolerant snowflakes.. but that does not represent the overall feel of Raleigh.
IMHO the meaning of "snowflake", as it applies to people, is being completely hijacked / rewritten here with potentially an unpleasant racial undercurrent.
The term "snowflake" was coined and minted to refer to the folks who say "I was born X but identify as Y, if I can't go to the bathroom as Y I will cry about it". Snowflakes feel everyone is special in their own way, and a professionally competitive drag queen should make the same salary as a heart surgeon because nobody's role is more or less important, and if that doesn't happen it's an example of bullying.
I'm not saying that is MY view on life. I'm very liberal and progressive-minded. I just don't like when one group lacks the creativity to come up with their own labels and tries to hijack those of another.
To the OP, take a look at Asheville, it is a very tolerant and trans-tolerant place. The Raleigh-Durham area is also to some extent but it is fundamentally a "professional" place. Its a place to work hard and make money to move somewhere else later, its not really the end game in itself.
To the OP, take a look at Asheville, it is a very tolerant and trans-tolerant place. The Raleigh-Durham area is also to some extent but it is fundamentally a "professional" place. Its a place to work hard and make money to move somewhere else later, its not really the end game in itself.
I don't think OP would be happy in Asheville based on their leanings and adverseness to masking. Asheville recently started enforcing masking again this past Wednesday in government buildings and it might escalate from there to other public areas.
I think OP probably needs to look into Florida or Texas.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
