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Definitely no, I am not OK with any of these! Should I ditch that entire area then? Seriously asking!
What Bo said above is how I would have replied as well.
It depends on what you’re used to and what your threshold is. We came from a place where crime was very rare. We had our car rummaged through about 2 months after moving here. It obviously doesn’t happen to everyone, but it happens a lot even in the higher income areas.
That being said we still live here and love it here, but the crime does irk me a little. It’s something that could be worked on in my opinion.
There is a train which runs though central Cary, so that is something to watch for on the maps. There is also a lot of construction on the major highways. Since the OP works from home, they should looks for housing with easy access for the occasional trips to the office in Durham. Google Maps is a great tool.
I also thought the OP's expectations about crime are unrealistic. Stealing from unlocked cars happens everywhere. Lots of people own guns and use them in domestic disputes.
Perhaps further out in the country would be better for the OP: especially Hillsborough in Orange County.
I don't think OP's expectations about crime are necessarily unrealistic, I just think m378 asked kind of a loaded question. I can't think of a normal, well-adjusted person anywhere in the world who would be ok with shootings and their stuff being stolen. I don't think it's a regular enough occurrence here for OP to be concerned about it, and I don't think it was fair of m378 to ask that- crime is quite low here, but of course just like anywhere in the world it does happen. OP, being an adult who lives on earth, I'm sure wasn't expecting a 0 crime situation and I hope that bizarre line of questioning didn't make them think those areas are overrun with thievery or gun violence.
I don't think OP's expectations about crime are necessarily unrealistic, I just think m378 asked kind of a loaded question. I can't think of a normal, well-adjusted person anywhere in the world who would be ok with shootings and their stuff being stolen. I don't think it's a regular enough occurrence here for OP to be concerned about it, and I don't think it was fair of m378 to ask that- crime is quite low here, but of course just like anywhere in the world it does happen. OP, being an adult who lives on earth, I'm sure wasn't expecting a 0 crime situation and I hope that bizarre line of questioning didn't make them think those areas are overrun with thievery or gun violence.
it's not bizarre IMO. It is a "what's your threshold" question.
As noted, I've "been here all my life". It wasn't until a decade ago, yes even in Raleigh, I worried about locking the house doors at night, but of course they are now. I forget to lock my car doors about 1/3 of the time, and so luck (?) has been on my side, I guess. Life used to be simpler. Someone on my ND about 2 miles as the crow flies reported just last night said they woke up to some noise and found an intruder (got through a locked screen door, main door mistakenly not locked) in their family room who appeared surprised to see them.
I don't think OP's expectations about crime are necessarily unrealistic, I just think m378 asked kind of a loaded question. I can't think of a normal, well-adjusted person anywhere in the world who would be ok with shootings and their stuff being stolen. I don't think it's a regular enough occurrence here for OP to be concerned about it, and I don't think it was fair of m378 to ask that- crime is quite low here, but of course just like anywhere in the world it does happen. OP, being an adult who lives on earth, I'm sure wasn't expecting a 0 crime situation and I hope that bizarre line of questioning didn't make them think those areas are overrun with thievery or gun violence.
I don’t think my questions were loaded, they were specific questions to determine the level of noise tolerance and crime tolerance. There are places (parts of NJ being one) with crime rates much lower than here. Someone coming from one of those places may not be ok with the crime levels here. At the end of the day Cary is a relatively safe place, but as I’ve said a million times, if you’re not used to a certain level of crime, it may bother you.
I work in downtown Durham. My co-workers who live in Cary or SW Raleigh have around an hour drive home at night. Expect it to get worse. If you have to come into the office on occasion, factor that into equation. Durham or Orange Counties are probably your best bet. Chapel Hill and Durham have a Whole Foods. Parks and Rec -- a good number of playgrounds, lots of basketball hoops, limited places for ice skating (it is the south).
What Bo said above is how I would have replied as well.
It depends on what you’re used to and what your threshold is. We came from a place where crime was very rare. We had our car rummaged through about 2 months after moving here. It obviously doesn’t happen to everyone, but it happens a lot even in the higher income areas.
That being said we still live here and love it here, but the crime does irk me a little. It’s something that could be worked on in my opinion.
I don’t think my questions were loaded, they were specific questions to determine the level of noise tolerance and crime tolerance. There are places (parts of NJ being one) with crime rates much lower than here. Someone coming from one of those places may not be ok with the crime levels here. At the end of the day Cary is a relatively safe place, but as I’ve said a million times, if you’re not used to a certain level of crime, it may bother you.
I came from a country where if you forgot your jacket in a car, the car will be open and jacket will be stolen. I am used to lock my cars, my home doors, even locking my balcony.
Insurance is for that kind of things anyways if they happen. However, I don't want to live again in a place where theft and criminals are waiting for you to do a mistake.
I am not fan of guns, their sounds, the way they look, etc... unless I am somewhat sure they are in the right hands. I don't want to wake up on a sound of a nearby gunshot every other week. I am OK with hearing that once in a 10 years though!
Now, where should I live?
.......I am not fan of guns, their sounds, the way they look, etc... unless I am somewhat sure they are in the right hands. I don't want to wake up on a sound of a nearby gunshot every other week. I am OK with hearing that once in a 10 years though!
Now, where should I live?
I suggest you reconsider living anwhere in the American South, where local policies favor gun ownership. The Republicans in our Legislature are likely to try to make it easier to own guns and to do concealed carry. Our new Senator Ted Budd is a gun-shop owner.
Perhaps Maryland or Delaware would be more to your liking. Or just find a New Jersey school district that is better than where you are.
But, in general, avoid rural areas, where residents enjoy target shooting in undeveloped areas. In my town we heard hours of target shooting on Sunday afternoons until the land had houses built on it. The Sheriff was called, but he could not do anything other than chase them off.
Last edited by goldenage1; 12-17-2022 at 02:17 AM..
May I ask where in central Jersey you’re from? I used to live in Somerset County , and I can probably give you some good comparisons. Nearly all of the Triangle is a safe, giant family friendly suburb. There is petty crime, just like anywhere else, but I have never once felt unsafe. We escaped NJ 8 years ago, and I have never spent a single second regretting our choice. I only wish we had moved sooner.
I’m happy to answer any questions you may have.
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