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Moving from Sacramento, California to Raleigh, North Carolina: social scene, religious pressure, housing, taxes, cost of living, cultural differences, outdoor activities
Right now, I live in Sacramento, I'm not a Cali native, 47, 2x divorced, I have 8 and 6 year olds living with their mom in Savannah. Primary reason for applying for the promotion is a) proximity to my kids and b) the high COL of living and out of control liberal politics in California.
Those things said, I'm also fearsome of a return to what I consider the fairly socially retarded South... I'm originally an Iowan, and I've lived in MI, IN, OH, VA and MS before moving out to California in April 2007... I don't really want to come back to the South at all - I really got my fill of it from 91-99 in VA and 99-07 in MS... OTOH, I kind of know what to expect, and supposedly "The Triangle is different".
I'd be working in downtown Raleigh... but what kind of social scene is there going to be (without the ridiculous religious pressure there is throughout the South to "go to church" (I am an agnostic, believe what you wish, but don't force it on me) for a 2x divorced 47 year old guy? I love to bike and run, and its nice here to be able to go to bars and restaurant w/o smoking, but I saw that NC recently rejected a statewide ban on smoking (another reason to dislike the South).
The only real upsides I can see over CA are more house for your money and lower taxes, maybe a little less crime, and the gov't isn't all screwed up because of rampant illegal immigrants and misguided liberalism. And being a five hour drive from my kids.
Convince me that I shouldn't withdraw my ap for a 2nd time. (they readvertised this job, I pulled my ap the first time... I'd be making around 100K a year).
People aren't exactly chasing everyone around beating them on the head with Bibles FYI, and you want socially retarded, you're already living in the state that is tard HQ; frankly your ignorant cliched view of the South leads me to believe you might be better off in Calif. Then again having livedin MISS I guess I can kind of understand that....
But FYI, NC gov't is no less screwed up than most any other gov't. Don't even get me started on the Dept of Transportation......
People aren't exactly chasing everyone around beating them on the head with Bibles FYI, and you want socially retarded, you're already living in the state that is tard HQ; frankly your ignorant cliched view of the South leads me to believe you might be better off in Calif. Then again having livedin MISS I guess I can kind of understand that....
But FYI, NC gov't is no less screwed up than most any other gov't. Don't even get me started on the Dept of Transportation......
Ironically, w/o naming agencies... I would be working with (but not for) NCDOT LOL
I just saw too much of Bible thumpers trying to push their social agenda via laws on everyone (particularly in MS) but I also saw it to a lesser extent in VA. Its the exact opposite here, you've got liberals wanting to push THEIR social experiment on everyone else...
RE: religion. It's not bad here. When we first moved to Charleston, SC, the very first question we were asked, by ~90% of people we met, was "have you found a church yet?". You politely say "no", they recommend theirs, you smile, and go on with the rest of the conversation. No pushiness. Since we've been in NC, I don't recall anyone asking us about church, except for the people from a local church coming by (they get a list of all new home buyers in their area and make a "welcome visit").
I remember people being more pushy in SoCal (OC) with religion. I think it has to do with there being more of what I call - and no offense people, really - pseuo-Christian born-again types in CA than in SC/NC. Here there are many more churches, but real churches - Episcopalian, Baptist, Lutheran, AME, Catholic.
If you consider the South socially retarded, I can guarantee you, you'll fit right in.
Why not relocate to Jacksonville, FL? You'd be much closer to your kids, and further away from us.
Last edited by Bilirubin; 01-08-2009 at 04:27 AM..
Reason: typo: there/their
RE: religion. It's not bad here. When we first moved to Charleston, SC, the very first question we were asked, by ~90% of people we met, was "have you found a church yet?". You politely say "no", they recommend theirs, you smile, and go on with the rest of the conversation. No pushiness. Since we've been in NC, I don't recall anyone asking us about church, except for the people from a local church coming by (they get a list of all new home buyers in their area and make a "welcome visit").
I remember people being more pushy in SoCal (OC) with religion. I think it has to do with there being more of what I call - and no offense people, really - pseuo-Christian born-again types in CA than in SC/NC. Here there are many more churches, but real churches - Episcopalian, Baptist, Lutheran, AME, Catholic.
If you consider the South socially retarded, I can guarantee you, you'll fit right in.
Why not relocate to Jacksonville, FL? You'd be much closer to your kids, and further away from us.
My agency does not have any offices in Jacksonville.
Right now, I live in Sacramento, I'm not a Cali native, 47, 2x divorced, I have 8 and 6 year olds living with their mom in Savannah. Primary reason for applying for the promotion is a) proximity to my kids and b) the high COL of living and out of control liberal politics in California.
Those things said, I'm also fearsome of a return to what I consider the fairly socially retarded South... I'm originally an Iowan, and I've lived in MI, IN, OH, VA and MS before moving out to California in April 2007... I don't really want to come back to the South at all - I really got my fill of it from 91-99 in VA and 99-07 in MS... OTOH, I kind of know what to expect, and supposedly "The Triangle is different".
I'd be working in downtown Raleigh... but what kind of social scene is there going to be (without the ridiculous religious pressure there is throughout the South to "go to church" (I am an agnostic, believe what you wish, but don't force it on me) for a 2x divorced 47 year old guy? I love to bike and run, and its nice here to be able to go to bars and restaurant w/o smoking, but I saw that NC recently rejected a statewide ban on smoking (another reason to dislike the South).
The only real upsides I can see over CA are more house for your money and lower taxes, maybe a little less crime, and the gov't isn't all screwed up because of rampant illegal immigrants and misguided liberalism. And being a five hour drive from my kids.
Convince me that I shouldn't withdraw my ap for a 2nd time. (they readvertised this job, I pulled my ap the first time... I'd be making around 100K a year).
The south has it's own culture just like the other places you live. I find this place no more backward than I did Iowa, which is where I am from.
From your posts I can only see a lot of negatives and not a lot of positives. We have tons of great trails for biking and running. We have a Hashrunners group and all of that. The Triangle is a fairly progressive metro area. Most places are smoke free, but if there is a bar, smoking is normally allowed. (You seem to hate the liberal experiments yet you complain because NC did not bow to limiting the rights of people and business owners?)
Anyway, in my opinion if you lived in a larger city in Va in those time periods and did not like it, then you will not like it here. My advice is find a place close to your kids that you like and then find a job in that location and move. Kids take care of you in the future, jobs don't.
I'm an Iowan originally and I realize that different parts of the South have different 'culture'... Virginia is much different than Mississippi, Georgia is different than NC...
I could probably eventually get a transfer to ATL, but its a overwhelmingly huge city...
How does Raleigh compare to Sacramento/California? Better, worse? It seems like housing prices really aren't all that much a bargain as they may have been a few years ago.
For example, how much house can I buy for a reasonable price - say $150K... and I don't want an attached townhouse. How far out would that mileage and driving time?
I grew up in NC, but lived in Portland for a number of years before moving back to NC. As you know, the west coast is just different than the east coast.
However, I don't consider NC to be socially retarded. I consider some people to be socially retarded but I don't usually put that description on a whole state. And socially retarded people can live anywhere.
We're aeithist but have not found religion (out side family pressure) to be an issue here in NC. In 18 months I have had 2 people ask me about church. We sent our youngest to a church preschool and someone asked me if we went to that church. I simply replied no. Another time an 8 year old friend invited us to church to hear her sing. Pretty inocent stuff.
You will find more suttle ways that religion creeps into politics here. I haven't seen the wide spread iniatives like in places like AL, MS, FL or even on the other end like in CA. But I was very shocked to see county and city governments giving money to non-profits run by churches. While these non-profits provide services to the city (such as drug rehab or helping at risk kids) it comes w/ a clear message.
There is more smoking here than we saw in Portland, but it's MUCH LESS than 20 years ago in this area. Most resturants here are smoke free. I don't know about the bar scene.
There are plenty of running and cycling groups in this area. Lots of fit, educated people. The American Tobacco Trail (yeah, it's ironic) is a great place for both running and cycling.
I think in general the people who enjoy this area the most are ones who come in with an open mind and honestly search for things they enjoy. I knew Durham wasn't going to be Portland. And there are a ton of things about Portland that I miss. But I have found many unique things about this area that I love.
Part of the reason we moved was to be closer to aging parents. Whether Raleigh is right for you or not, I do hope you are able to move closer to your children. They need you and you need them.... it's just how we're all wired.
Good luck.
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People aren't exactly chasing everyone around beating them on the head with Bibles FYI, and you want socially retarded, you're already living in the state that is tard HQ; frankly your ignorant cliched view of the South leads me to believe you might be better off in Calif. Then again having livedin MISS I guess I can kind of understand that....
