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I have a friend that I have known for 3 or 4 years. I love him to death. He is honest, creative, funny as hell and there is hardly a dull moment when it comes to him. He has always been a secretive person. He is very smart, very very smart, but he likes to listen to other people talk.
Now I can understand not opening up to a lot of people for whatever reason because I do the same. But I often get very frustrated when I ask him certain simple things and I have to solve riddles and/or go thru a lot of BS just to get an answer or something that will suffice as an answer. For example, he says he is going out of the country around christmas, I ask him how long is he going to be gone for and I either don't get a response or get some strange response that has nothing to do with what we are talking about.
I love him to death and would do anything for him if I was able and I just feel like he should open up to me more. We have been roommates before and plan to be again once I get a hold on school, accomodations for my kids, etc. I am not a prying girlfriend, stalker or someone that he should not really open up to. I just don't understand. I consider him to be one of my best friends, I tell him anything because I know he won't judge me. If I just needed to tell someone somthing and was very sensitive about it, I would go to him. He shares with me in bits and pieces, so it's like...dam? How do you take this sort of behavior? Would it offend you or would you do as I have been and accept that the bottom line is that he is a true friend and just does not like to talk about himself, etc. IDK, Very Confused!!!
You sound like a strawberry letter on Steve Harvey...most wise men barely discuss their own lives. I had an old teacher in highschool, all the kids would go to him. He would talk about life and never about his own. We were not even sure if he was married or not he would answer in riddles that went either way, he was always dressed to impress, many other female teachers had a thing for him, and he was a really good teacher, he went on to teach at GSU. The same describe sounds like my old social studies teacher.
I can understand not wanting to reveal too much about yourself, but if you are a TRUE FRIEND and have shown to prove so, why wouldn't you reward them with a straight forward conversation about things?
And how the hell does the sound like a strawberry letter,lol?? There is not any drama involved in the relationship between he and I, just real talk and a lot of laughs. So again, CONFUSED!
Does not a true friend accept their friends just as they are? I see that you're not trying to change him directly, but perhaps you're wondering a bit too much...just take him as he is.
True friends come in all shapes, colors and forms. You're letting something rather small irritate you because, I assume, you think he should be as completely open with you as you are with him. You need to simply enjoy the fact that he's there for you and accept the fact that he's not going to reciprocate in the way you expect him to. Are you maybe expecting more from this relationship than friendship?
I had a girlfriend exactly like that. She would always ask me about me. Always into my business. When, I ask her something. It was all a big secret. I stopped sharing my life with her. The problem was solved.
My husband of 19 years is this way. A lot of it stems from insecurity. The best way to get them to open up is to be closed down yourself. They often feel that if you are this open about yourself, what are you going to tell others about them? If you show them you can keep things to yourself, they will open up a bit at a time. My experience has been that it's been worth the effort to get to know them. Oh, and they enjoy the cat and mouse aspect.
I had a girlfriend exactly like that. She would always ask me about me. Always into my business. When, I ask her something. It was all a big secret. I stopped sharing my life with her. The problem was solved.
I think this situation is a little different in that the OP is voluntarily sharing her innermost thoughts with her friend, he's not prying anything out of her.
I am feeling all of your responses, and unfortunately Childfree, if it were someone else I would have jumped on the fastest thing smoking but in this case, even though it bothers me, eventually I figure things out or I may possibly **** him off to where he clicks on me and answers what I want to know. It depends on how serious the convo really is. In any case, I do not like him mad at me so I normally try not to push it that far. It bothers me yes, a lot, but the quality of friend I have, I won't sacrifice it. He has been a better friend to me than some individuals I have known since high school, hell, even some relatives don't get priority over him. I try and make him understand that he is am amazing person with an astonishing imagination and I just like to hear him talk and see him in action, so I like to know what is goin on with him. No matter what it is about. He says in time, be patient to almost everything, I can only handle so much of that but it is something I have definitely got better with over the years in knowing him.
And no I am not looking for anything else with him, the relationship we have is fine the way it is, minus the lack of information that is comfy for me. Besides, I have seen what he is packing, so I will take the crazy, nosy, impatient friend over the sex crazed stalker status anyday! LOL!!
Thanks everyone for your input, I see that most of your comments are some that he has made to me himself and others are my own thoughts when contemplating the whole ordeal.
There may be some things about you that drive him crazy or confuse him...like your need to ask questions. He accepts you for who you are, you should do the same. Sounds like you've got a good friend and those are hard to come by these days!
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He accepts you for who you are, you should do the same. Sounds like you've got a good friend and those are hard to come by these days! 
