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Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
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I'm talking about someone who never even had a bf/gf in high school, or romantically kissed someone. Will their total lack of experience combined with their advanced age make their first relationship harder/more awkward, especially with the fears and hangups, or will it just take a bit longer? Even on cd I'm betting it's rare, lol, but does it largely depend on the person and WHY they've got to 25 in this condition? Yes, if you must know, I'm referring to yours truly. My main reasons are anxiety disorder, low self confidence and psychological issues relating to...private matters, lol.
Um, yes...in the sense that you are starting late and may have to go through all the learning that other people have had a head start on by 10 or some-odd years. Other than that, I don't see why that would be a problem.
I say no,
because the first time, will be special.
If they waited this long, they must have a reason or purpose in doing it (even if they don't realize it)
Depends on whether or not you can find someone in the same shoes. If you have zero experience and you're hooking up with someone that's slept with 200 people then it could be a bit weird. But if you find another who's also been 'held back' then it would be less awkward than it was for two teenage virgins, since you (hopefully) benefit from maturity.
It shouldn't be. I have no problems admitting I was actually a year beyond that when I met my fiance, who was 31 (and had been married before, so that clearly wasn't his issue). It was a learning curve for both of us like I would expect in any relationship, learning what we both liked together. Just a few weeks in, and there was no indication that I was "inexperienced".
There are some people who might attempt to force a handicap on a late bloomer, like it's some sort of stigma. For me, I had been seriously overweight, which I've now lost, and was very focused on school, as I had my law degree by 23. Dating just wasn't on my radar. I got out and started working, and lost all the weight, then got interested in dating (and it got interested in me). I'm not a freak, I just had other priorities, and now I'm engaged to a wonderful man. At no point did he ever treat my lack of experience like some kind of negative, and someone who cares about you won't either.
Your "condition", as you put it,is certainly nothing to be concerned about, it's obviosly something that only you can change when you're ready..Instead try working through your issues of anxiety and self confidence..You've seemed to make up your mind that you want love before sex, which is sweet, because anyone can get sex if they want it..don't be worried, that special time will come for you, and like macgeek said it will be even more special.
Don't know but I think alot of it would depend on your level of maturity....as alot of it could come naturally, therefore it wouldn't be much of an issue.
I was in your shoes at one point in time but I did sort of have a boyfriend in high school that only last about 7 months. I had a huge BS meter so that prevented me from dating anyone I felt was not right for me.
At 24, I became engaged to someone I shouldn't have after a short courtship and broke it off shortly before the date. Then my husband and I dated and got married at 25, a few months after my birthday and we also had a short courtship.
Always listen to your gut instinct on somebody you meet in the process; its better than any past experience can tell you.
My main reasons are anxiety disorder, low self confidence and psychological issues relating to...private matters, lol.
The lack of experience will mean you have a lot to learn about relationships. But I imagine these reasons for your lack of experience will cause more problems. I don't know what specifically you mean by "psychological issues" but I know low self esteem can be the root of jealousy and snooping which can be very destructive to relationships.
the fact that you have emphisized your verginity, seems to imply that you are equating sex with personal value.
Low self esteem issues are rooted much deeper and what ever those issues are neeed to be dealt with first . Otherwise you will be settling for what you can get rather than what you are really worth.
Primarily it is your choice to make changes in your personality , (no one is saying it is going to be easy ) but people choose personality over, looks who are genuine and thoughtful . People that choose looks over personality are simply shallow and egocentric. "Yours truely " I have been on both sides of the fence.
It might be good theropy for you to volinteer at a shelter or thrift store and work helping others for a while. Don't make it a place to shovel your woe's too, just be ther to be a help to others . If you start bragging on all your woes ,you've recreate a new barrior to avoid friendship . If some one asks if you ever had such and such a problem you might honestly say yes ,if it applies, and add, but I am working it out ,and leave it at that. People that share their woes are lonely because that is the only thing in their life they have to talk about , self absorbed. I can digg up some woes if i want to but I have to remember where ai burried them , and with my current memory , I am more concerned with what to day and tomorrow will bring . I have to live for the future, and not be drug down by the past .
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