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Let me upfront and say I am a widow (4years), over 60, been married twice. I am now dating someone my age (actually a little older ) for about a month. He has been a gentleman whenever we are together. He calls and we talk online everyday. We see each other a couple of times a week usually. I enjoy his company and we have fun when we go out. He usually buys me flowers and is a good cook.
Now, he has started making little comments which I take as his way of saying he wants to go a step further (yep 6x) and I am just don't know if I feel that way about him. I don't want it to become so I feel like that is all he wants whenever we are together. I have told him I wasn't ready to make that kind of commitment yet but the hints keep on coming.
Is it me just being too cautious or is that all there is?
I have dated others but he is the first one I have been out with that I really enjoy being with.
In my opinion, He is telling you what he wants eventually in this relationship. You have to decide if it's what you want.
Do you just want him as a friend? If so, Maybe he is looking for a girlfriend, not a friend.
You guys need to communicate so you are on the same page.
Personally I think that a gradual progression from friendship to sexual relations is only natural for a couple. If the relationship is going to work it's going to proceed from getting to know each other through the various steps until we're talking about a sexual relationship. Is this really so shocking after all of the years that you've lived? Human beings have a sexual nature and it's a natural human need. You just have to decide if this particular individual is the one that you want to have sexual relations with. It's not rocket science, it's sex.
Since he's a good cook, he doesn't want you for that. He'd still young enough to want a sexual partner. And he wouldn't have to worry about getting you pregnant or catching a disease.
If you enjoy his company, and he enjoys yours, I think you are correct in thinking that's where he's headed. However, whether that's ALL it is, will take some time to figure out. Your decision is figure out how much you enjoy his company.
There are a lot of older couples that are enjoying the pleasures of dating without the complications of having to live together. It's not the terrible thing that it once was.
Think about these lines from Jeff Foxworthy's Totally Committed:
you ever hear a group of women talking to each other " OOO i wish i knew what he was really thinking"
Ladies, i'll tell you what we're really thinking.
We're really thinking "I'd like a beer and i'd like to see something naked".
Thats all we're thinking.
You go to a nursing home and see a 90 year old man going down the hall on a walker.
That's what he's thinking "I'd like a beer and I'd like to see something naked".
It is funny since when I was younger and divorced where it wasn't going didn't seem to matter as much as it does now. When I met my 2nd husband I knew at once he was the one. We lived together for 5 years before marriage and we had our ups and downs like most couples.
The other man I dated for any length of time didn't drop hints and let things progress normally. We broke up after a year of dating and then I moved away. I don't want to get married again so that isn't it. I just want it to mean more than it did the last time.
I told him I didn't want to be pressured and he said OK, but I do feel that way when he drops those hints. Maybe it is just me taking them too seriously.
Thanks Shuke.. that is exactly what I figured. It doesn't matter who it is as long as it is someone naked.
i have had feelings for an old fling from 30 years. we met again two years ago became intimate once. we both enjiyed one another but now he thinks we should br friends. he says he would rather lose the sex than me as a friend. i am hurt because i wanted romance
Let me upfront and say I am a widow (4years), over 60, been married twice. I am now dating someone my age (actually a little older ) for about a month. He has been a gentleman whenever we are together. He calls and we talk online everyday. We see each other a couple of times a week usually. I enjoy his company and we have fun when we go out. He usually buys me flowers and is a good cook.
Now, he has started making little comments which I take as his way of saying he wants to go a step further (yep 6x) and I am just don't know if I feel that way about him. I don't want it to become so I feel like that is all he wants whenever we are together. I have told him I wasn't ready to make that kind of commitment yet but the hints keep on coming.
Is it me just being too cautious or is that all there is?
I have dated others but he is the first one I have been out with that I really enjoy being with.
Yay for you, Keeper! He probably does want to take it to that next level but he's nice enough to let you drive the car. Take your time and enjoy the ride. When you're ready, go for it but for now enjoy the flowers and the cooking!
p.s. I'm jealous, because I've never dated a good cook!
So, Keeper, this thread is from '07. Whatever happened with you and this guy? Inquiring minds you know.
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) for about a month. He has been a gentleman whenever we are together. He calls and we talk online everyday. We see each other a couple of times a week usually. I enjoy his company and we have fun when we go out. He usually buys me flowers and is a good cook.
