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I am trying to figure out the reasons that drives men to seek relationship away from their marriage.
Would you admit it was selfish?
Was there something a lot more complex than just being selfish?
Could anything have been done by a spouse that would have prevented it?
Did you regret your cheating and thought it was a mistake?
Would you try to reconcile with your wife?
Women's opinion is also welcome.
No, I wouldn't. To me infidelity is a deal-breaker. I know that I would never be able to trust them again, and why would I want someone that I had to worry about constantly.
Like, was I being distant at the time? Had I played a role in it? I was with a girl for some time who more or less was convinced that any time I had a female friend or corworker who I got along with, or shared a birthday with (seriously), or had common interests with... either we already had fooled around, or we would. This would precipitate a rocky patch, during which she usually cheated on me.
Once I wisened up to it I pulled the plug. The irony of the matter is that I was always faithful to her. I never cheated on her, not even once. I just get the feeling that most of the time, if someone is so paranoid about such things, it's largely due to their own insecurities.
What I did learn from her though, is that once you let someone get away with it, even if they feel guilt about it for awhile, the next time they're tempted, they often figure that they'll be able to rationalize and apologize a way out of this one, too.
Like, was I being distant at the time? Had I played a role in it? I was with a girl for some time who more or less was convinced that any time I had a female friend or corworker who I got along with, or shared a birthday with (seriously), or had common interests with... either we already had fooled around, or we would. This would precipitate a rocky patch, during which she usually cheated on me.
Once I wisened up to it I pulled the plug. The irony of the matter is that I was always faithful to her. I never cheated on her, not even once. I just get the feeling that most of the time, if someone is so paranoid about such things, it's largely due to their own insecurities.
What I did learn from her though, is that once you let someone get away with it, even if they feel guilt about it for awhile, the next time they're tempted, they often figure that they'll be able to rationalize and apologize a way out of this one, too.
The other person is never responsible for an infidelity. Sorry, but no. If you are going to cheat man up to your choices. It is only the adulterous one fault.
I hold them to the same standard as I hold myself.
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Would you forgive a one-time occurence of infidelity?
The answer -
