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I've had a number of female roommates the last few years, always people I knew in advance. (I don't believe men and women should have co-ed roommates they don't already know, but that's a topic for another time) Right now, I'm leasing a room and a bathroom to a chick friend who's a liberal arts grad student, and could not otherwise to afford to live in my safe neighborhood.
We get along well. However, living together means there's nudity at some point, and she is far more open minded about it than other women I've lived with. She doesn't care if I walk around naked, and this time of year, that happens a lot. I've seen her completely naked a number of times as well.
In spite of all the temptation this creates, we have never had any physical activity. Not even a long kiss. But her friends know about our arrangement and don't believe that we're not doing it. In turn, some women are refusing to date me because they keep hearing from their friends in our extended social circle that my roommate and I are hooking up all the time.
I'm physically attracted to her, but I'm also physically attracted to half the women I know. And I've been drunk around her, and not even thought about making a move because I know it would mess things up between us, and I really want to date other people. She's my friend so I'm not going to kick her out and make her live with 5 people, or force her to move to the 'hood (I own the place and have set the very lenient lease terms). And even if I told her we had to cover up more, the rumors about us are already out of control.
I just can't believe our setup is that unique. Is it?
I'm gonna get a lot of hate for this, but I think you should save up to buy your own place.
You're putting yourself in a position to tempt yourself into doing something with a friend that you'll regret.
Another reason to leave, besides it not being right IMO, but also because of those loser friends of hers. They're part of the problem too. They're encouraging you to do something that's not right. Don't give into them.
Also, another reason to leave is so those loser friends can't affect any other potential dates.
I'm gonna get a lot of hate for this, but I think you should save up to buy your own place.
You're putting yourself in a position to tempt yourself into doing something with a friend that you'll regret.
Another reason to leave, besides it not being right IMO, but also because of those loser friends of hers. They're part of the problem too. They're encouraging you to do something that's not right. Don't give into them.
Also, another reason to leave is so those loser friends can't affect any other potential dates.
Maybe you should read better. He is the one who owns the place.
i've had opposite sex roommates before and its never been an issue so long as both parties are truly in it for platonic reasons. You obviously want to bone her, so either get it over with or tune down the X rated stuff in the house.
I'm gonna get a lot of hate for this, but I think you should save up to buy your own place.
Thanks, you've got some good insights.
I already own this place. She's a friend I've known for years, and is the younger sister of a good friend from college. Also, she pays me about a 1/4 of the market rate, I'm basically doing her a big favor, I don't need a roommate to cover the mortgage.
I've had lots of male roommates, no nudity. It's not really that difficult to accomplish.
If it works for you.. continue; if it doesn't, stop.
I've had male roommates, too - and was never naked in front of them either.
If you are happy with your living arrangement - keep the status quo. Hopefully, the right woman will believe that there is nothing going on between you and your roommate and will trust you enough to date you. In NYC, co-ed roommates are very common so most people don't think it's a big deal.
Gee, Jack...why don't you just tell Mr Roper you're gay?
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