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My live-in boyfriend (of almost 2 years) and I had great sex on Tuesday night. Wednesday I came home from work and saw that he was looking at porn during the day on the computer. I'm like WTF? To me that is a slap in the face. I couldn't even sleep in the same bed with him last night I was so pissed. I could see if i never gave it up, but at least 4 times a week is pretty good in my opinion. What is it about porn? If you have a great looking girl, what's the need?
See it this way; He's just doing the maintenance to keep it in tip-top shape for when he's boning you.
Besides he's probably been practicing his hand-skills since he was about 10 years old, you don't just scrap skills like that
Not sure how I would feel if my girl watched porn or got swooned by those erotic-romantic novels and chick flicks.
Something related is girls getting a heart attack because their guy masturbates which I find a bit hypocritical considering how the vast majority of women masturbate too (even though women normally deny doing it). Having a guy/girl prefer masturbation over nice loving sex is a different story.
4 times a week may not be enough. If you're bothered by a man looking at porn you are in for a hard life. If it is NOT messing with your sex life then why do you care?
Nobody needs porn. I've used it in the past. But I haven't used it for years. It is not necessary to use porn in order to masturbate. I would recommend having an honest, non-accusatory discussion with him about this. Mention that you accidentally saw on the computer that he was using porn and that it had upset you that he had been using it, but that you are not angry now, but you don't like porn and you want to talk about it. Don't be angry. Don't be accusatory. Be supportive, but state your honest opinions, and how his use of porn hurts you.
Porno can be very addictive. Signs it could be a problem are if he's trying to hide it from you. That indicates a possible addiction problem. But paradoxically, sending very negative or angry signals about his use of it would potentially encourage him to do it all the more, and hide it all the more if he's got a potential problem.
For more information, research Sex Addiction on the internet. If you're concerned he may be a sex addict, researching sex addiction could possibly help you figure out how to help him rather than simply make the problem worse through angry reactions.
Sex Addiction is very similar to alcoholism. It is strengthened by shame. Shaming him won't help if he's a sex addict. It will make it worse.
Nobody needs porn. I've used it in the past. But I haven't used it for years. It is not necessary to use porn in order to masturbate. I would recommend having an honest, non-accusatory discussion with him about this. Mention that you accidentally saw on the computer that he was using porn and that it had upset you that he had been using it, but that you are not angry now, but you don't like porn and you want to talk about it. Don't be angry. Don't be accusatory. Be supportive, but state your honest opinions, and how his use of porn hurts you.
Porno can be very addictive. Signs it could be a problem are if he's trying to hide it from you. That indicates a possible addiction problem. But paradoxically, sending very negative or angry signals about his use of it would potentially encourage him to do it all the more, and hide it all the more if he's got a potential problem.
For more information, research Sex Addiction on the internet. If you're concerned he may be a sex addict, researching sex addiction could possibly help you figure out how to help him rather than simply make the problem worse through angry reactions.
Sex Addiction is very similar to alcoholism. It is strengthened by shame. Shaming him won't help if he's a sex addict. It will make it worse.
Masturbation can be compulsive and addicting for some, too. What's your point? OP is going too far, he could just have a high libido or looking for a release. It is not his way of saying OP is bad in the bed or anything.
Masturbation can be compulsive and addicting for some, too. What's your point? OP is going too far, he could just have a high libido or looking for a release. It is not his way of saying OP is bad in the bed or anything.
Yes, it can.
The OP doesn't like the porn. You can't have a successful relationship without honesty. She should be honest with him that his use of porn bothers her.
If she has additional reason to suspect he may be a sex addict, she should be armed with the information about what sex addiction is.
My live-in boyfriend (of almost 2 years) and I had great sex on Tuesday night. Wednesday I came home from work and saw that he was looking at porn during the day on the computer. I'm like WTF? To me that is a slap in the face. I couldn't even sleep in the same bed with him last night I was so pissed. I could see if i never gave it up, but at least 4 times a week is pretty good in my opinion. What is it about porn? If you have a great looking girl, what's the need?
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