Where are the non-independent loyal women? (dates, girlfriend, marry, cheated)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I think women will be criticized no matter what we decide to do. If we stay home, we are looked down upon; if we work, we are looked down upon as well.
Pretty much so...some of the comments in this thread really exemplify that. Like this one:
Quote:
I have never been attracted to women with no initiative or intelect that only wanted to stay at home and raise kids,
Oh please. It really does take a bit of "intelect" to raise children no matter what a woman does for work.
I don't think it's really so much what you do as how you do it. A high achieving career type parent of either sex just might screw up their kids if they raise them with the attitude that child raising is only for brainless twits who get fat and watch tv all day long. By the same token, someone who is truly unhappy being "only" a mom can screw up their kids too. And of course everyone's pointing fingers at everyone else concerning who screwed up their kids the most.
My son went to daycare and survived just fine. My choice would have been to stay at home.
Does anyone on this thread remember what it's like to be in daycare? I do. I remember just wanting to go home and be with my mom or dad. I would stand by the front door of my babysitter waiting for one of my parents to come and get me... they both worked full-time. So, when I had my own kids, I decided I'd forfeit the career (for now) so I could be there for them 24/7... at least until they go into 1st grade. I can't tell you how much I love it. I have been criticized by some friends and family members about my decision... as I'm sure moms who work are criticized also. I don't see myself as "dependent" as I'm college educated and don't need my husband to support myself or my kids. I think mothers (or fathers) should do whatever is in the best interest of their kids - whatever it takes and don't let anyone put you down for it. Tell 'em to stick it in their ear
When I was really little, I remember being upset that I was one of the last kids to be picked up. (Cause mom HAD to work.)
When I got older, I loved daycare, loved after school care, and never wanted to leave sleep away camp. Not every kid wants to be with mommy and daddy.
I think in general women "woke up". I honestly believe that if men actually shared (I mean atleast 50/50) the child rearing and household responsibilities instead the time for themselves that the women rarely get the chance to do, there would be more well-rounded families and probably less divorce.
It's unfair and frankly unrealistic to expect so much. We are women, not superheroes.
just a thought on Where are all the non-independent women
I always heard that when the women had to igo nto the factories and other 'work force' during WW2 because all the men were off fighting overseas
is when the womans role in the home changed , when the men came home and tried to 'put women back in thier place' ,women had tasted freedom and just would'nt buy into the whole 'me boss you obey' thought pattern anymore. Anyway my grandfather always said thats when women quit being women and started trying to be equals.
I haven't read all the posts, so I don't know if this has been offered up as a reason.
Back in those Good Old Days when the Little Woman stayed home and took care of The Man of The House and the little kiddies, just about all that was available to her was teaching, (more kiddies to tend to) nursing, (babies of all ages to tend) or some kind of office clerk. (poor pay, boring duties and dumb bosses). Staying home even with a jerk for a husband, was the easiest choice. Enjoy it? Some did. A lot took to drink or tranquilizers to make through the day.
Women married just to get married and away from Mom and Dad. Then she made do as best she could rather than admit she made a mistake.
Thank heavens that there are more options now. Some men may not feel as comfortable, but the smart ones know that they are getting women who are staying home because they WANT to, not because they have few other choices.
Some men may not feel as comfortable, but the smart ones know that they are getting women who are staying home because they WANT to, not because they have few other choices.
This thread is yet another example of a man seeing what he "wants" to see.
I was like a Stepford Housewife, my name is Susie and I really was the model Suzie-Homemaker. But my husband was an alcoholic and decided he didn't want to play house with me anymore.
After my marriage broke up had a boyfriend after that who wanted a "traditional" Albanian woman for a wife. I spent six years trying to make him happy. All I did was give and give and all he did was take.
He had moved to LA and demanded that I leave all my belongings behind, he said my move would be my own responsibility. He wanted me to leave it all behind and move cross country and start over like a teenager. After he was there for a while he just gave up on me and began dating around.
So yes there are good traditional women out there but there are also not many real men out there any more. I wasted many years before realizing this.
I am all in favor of the "loyal" part..not so much non-independent. These days a lot of men are looking for a "party" and then bring their "party favor" home. They're not looking to be in a family with the attendant responsibilities. And some guys want to "hedge their bets" with a living together arrangement. Not too many men appear to be seeking marriage....so why the hand-wringing over women not being loyal or independent anymore? It is certainly conditions that some men helped bring about.
Independence has become essential to a woman being able to thrive in modern times.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
just a thought on Where are all the non-independent women
