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It may be wishful thinking, but, I am hoping that the reason marriages are down (if the statistics are actually accurate) ... is that people today are taking a more serious, committed approach to marriage.
..... Unfortunately, with the increasingly liberal mindset of our society, they may simply be concluding "who needs marriage ... we can have all the benefits without it." (For example, in a major segment of our society, the illigitimate birth rate is at an astonishing 70%).
True more people are having kids without getting married. But children born to unwed mothers face numerous disadvantages growing up and other negative factors (poverty, lack of education, crime, etc).
Were your Parents 'archaic' by getting married then ?! Whenever a foundation such as Marriage gets destroyed in favor of immorality because people are only thinking about themselves, it weakens the fabric of society . These arent 'my views' ... they are the time honored , legal and ethical system for civility and wellbeing of a Nation ; people who go against that are really hurting themselves but are blinded by their actions. I used to Shackup a long time ago, so i know the titilizing lure it is playing house , but it should be outlawed for the preservation of America. The Country is already in bad enough shape from other competing immorality and corruption.
Being good parents has nothing to do with being married,.......NOTHING. My father is and was an old school, emotionally handicapped man. My parents fought all the time and they still bicker. It's probably because they're married that they go back and forth.
You want to marry the "Love of your life"--go to your local church, have a ceremony and be blessed by the pastor, priest or whatever. No legal ties.
Then if you really want to put your financial security at risk, go to your local courthouse and get that little legal piece of paper, which is nothing but a financial agreement.
If you decide to leave your "spouse" and do not have that little piece of paper, you are free and clear to do so, unless you were dumb enough to comingle your funds and your debt. The custody and well-being of the children will still have to be addressed by the court, yet, your funds are yours.
Have that little extra piece of paper, now you need to have the court system degree the divorce and they look at the petition as a distribution of the assets, a financial issue only. If there are children involved, custody and welfare for the children will also be addressed.
Judges look at divorce as a demise of a financial relationship, that's it.
So, what is the point, you can be in a committed relationship without having that little piece of paper, which guarantees nothing. If a spouse is
going to cheat they will, piece of paper or not.
Fear is not a factor. I have risked my life times beyond count, I do not need any lessons on gambling or risk taking. Risk simply is and I decide based on potential reward. As to what I am risking not remarrying, that would be essentially nothing. The reward, that is also essentially nothing. Kinda makes it a no brainer. And that boodha is sad.
Thanks for the explanation crabman1. I still don't understand what you're sad about but that's OK, I'll get over it.
Thanks for the explanation crabman1. I still don't understand what you're sad about but that's OK, I'll get over it.
I married for love. Not looks, not money, not status. I no longer have that opportunity. I can love, I can utterly and completely commit to one woman, but I most likely will never have the honor of her hand in marriage. Not even for what to me is the only reason that ever mattered at all. That is sad.
Being good parents has nothing to do with being married,.......NOTHING. My father is and was an old school, emotionally handicapped man. My parents fought all the time and they still bicker. It's probably because they're married that they go back and forth.
Being good parents has everything to do with being Married because it sets the right example for committed love no matter what may come , to the children. Regardless of your Parents bickering, they made it work and to your benefit. At least you werent the product of divorce, or a parent running off having an adulterous affair, or being an illigitimate child. Had they Shacked Up, you most likely would have been raised by one Parent for a good part of your childhood and have an emotional imbalance , possibly even homosexuality, due to a missing Parent who took advantage of the door being propped open for easy escape. You should tell your parents how proud of them you are for making it work , and not denounce the sanctity of Marriage since you didnt turn out too bad . Im pleased they had dignity and enough respect for each other and their children to stay together during not so easy times. Its a good lesson for todays apathetic/narcisistic/and 'whatever' generation to heed .
I married for love. Not looks, not money, not status. I no longer have that opportunity. I can love, I can utterly and completely commit to one woman, but I most likely will never have the honor of her hand in marriage. Not even for what to me is the only reason that ever mattered at all. That is sad.
Sadly, a prenup is pretty much a required item for people today, especially men, as they come out losing FAR more often than women do. I know a couple of guys who had to downgrade to one bedroom apartments after divorce because they had to give up the houses they had bought (keep paying the mortgage though), AND still pay extra for child support...it just devastated them...I know another guy who has to take jobs that pay cash on the side as his day job pay check gets swallowed up again by his divorce..getting married should not expose a guy to the possibility of financial ruin and disaster...I'm sorry ladies, but no woman is worth that.
On the flip side, while I do think the majority of divorced women do the right thing with the child support women, there seems to be a healthy chunk of you who don't...spending your child support money on yourselves and not the kids...and dont tell me this is just "a few bad apples"...a LOT of you do this...have the poor bastard ex slaving away while you spend his money on yourselves and other men...
I married for love. Not looks, not money, not status. I no longer have that opportunity. I can love, I can utterly and completely commit to one woman, but I most likely will never have the honor of her hand in marriage. Not even for what to me is the only reason that ever mattered at all. That is sad.
Awww, now I'm sad for you too, crabman1. **sniff, sniff**
I married for love. Not looks, not money, not status. I no longer have that opportunity. I can love, I can utterly and completely commit to one woman, but I most likely will never have the honor of her hand in marriage. Not even for what to me is the only reason that ever mattered at all. That is sad.
I think you over-dramatize things a little bit, Crab, particularly considering you're not really wiped out financially.
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