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It would be a pity if your water heater or something broke down and you had to go stay with friends or relatives for a bit until the repairs could be made....
You don't need any special tips. Just nicely tell them the truth. That at you enjoyed having them, but need to set some rules for the rest of their stay.
^^^^This coupled with, 'Gee, I have to be honest, we'd love to help you out but it really is not a good time for us." Period if they should ask to stay with you ever again. Details of the reason are none of their business.
Possibly they can rent a small storage facility for many of their larger bulkier things in your home.
But, if you want things a certain way you need to just sit down with them and tell them you may have bit off more than you can chew since you've never had long term houseguests and would like to maintain some decorum in your home. While you can appreciate their situation and a slight upheavel, you'd like to address a few things for the remainder of their stay.
There was a thread in here a while back of a woman who had similar issues with her relatives who were staying with her. I'll see if I can't dig that up for some suggestions and tips.
You are young and have learned a life lesson here. They behave that way as it works well for them. It would have smarter for them to stay in a hotel but then they would have had to pay which apparently, they don't like to do. It really seems like they targeted you and your husband.
Just a thought. Check your local ordinances as you might be in violation of some "number of people per square foot of living space" thing which might help you get rid of them.
Also, at some point, you may legally have to provide them with written notice to vacate as after a certain amount of time they do become legal renters (even without paying) which could make it harder to get rid of them.
You are kind hearted and trying to do the right thing but in this world, it is sometimes wise to stay arms length away from other people's problems. I appologize for others rude remarks on this thread as it serves no useful purpose to attack you for having a good heart.
Thank you so much for your remarks, I really do appreciate it.
We are youngish - and the lesson is now learned.
My husband & I were both raised to put others first and do what we can to help people in need, which are great qualities - we just need to draw line somewhere. We feel like awful people having this situation and complaining about it.
^^^^This coupled with, 'Gee, I have to be honest, we'd love to help you out but it really is not a good time for us." Period if they should ask to stay with you ever again. Details of the reason are none of their business.
Possibly they can rent a small storage facility for many of their larger bulkier things in your home.
But, if you want things a certain way you need to just sit down with them and tell them you may have bit off more than you can chew since you've never had long term houseguests and would like to maintain some decorum in your home. While you can appreciate their situation and a slight upheavel, you'd like to address a few things for the remainder of their stay.
There was a thread in here a while back of a woman who had similar issues with her relatives who were staying with her. I'll see if I can't dig that up for some suggestions and tips.
I think you are right. We need to say no and resist the urge to give a reason. It's none of their business why it won't work for us.
Are they aware of it? If so, and they haven't already offered to repair/pay then these folk are clearly trash and you should get them out asap. What I would do if I were you is a little bit of research. Gather up a list of kid friendly hotels (pool, gaming rooms, tc) with costs. Gather up a list of storage co's in the area and tell them good bye.
Great advice.
Also, GoingCrazy, I hope you are keeping a journal or notes of some sort. This has all the makings of a comedy. Or tragedy. Spin it how you wish.
It would be a pity if your water heater or something broke down and you had to go stay with friends or relatives for a bit until the repairs could be made....
Are you kidding me? I wouldn't leave these people in my house unsupervised. You might return home and find the place a smoking ruin.
Thank you so much for your remarks, I really do appreciate it.
We are youngish - and the lesson is now learned.
My husband & I were both raised to put others first and do what we can to help people in need, which are great qualities - we just need to draw line somewhere. We feel like awful people having this situation and complaining about it.
Your words have meant a lot.
Each of us is on our own path and they have to learn their lessons as well. There is a time for every season and it is time for them to be on their own way.
I too was taught to put others first but life has taught me that if I don't take care of myself, then I am not able to help others -- at a distance. Next time, it would be better to just tell someone in need where to get food or an inexpensive place to live. This time, you need to learn to tell them that you and your husband want your privacy again and it is time for them to move on. I'm sure they will find someone else to take advantage of as that is their mode of operation.
Looking at people with a critical eye is difficult when you want to help but there are too many people who all have hard luck stories. We all have had some kind of trouble in our life but we don't grow when we don't face our own problems and move on.
Are you kidding me? I wouldn't leave these people in my house unsupervised. You might return home and find the place a smoking ruin.
Ugh no, I was thinking they would be happy to move on to greener pastures if some of the perks of the current situation disappeared.
I've had in-laws freeload on me before and they can be awfully picky about their (my) living conditions!
How about telling a small fib, in order to save face and the friendship? (even though I don't think they're treating you very well).
Tell them you got a complaint from your HOA or nieghbors about the number of people at the address or too many cars etc..and that they'll have to leave in 7 days.
Trust me, they've been asked to leave someones house before! While you're writhing with embarrassment and being upset, they've got hides like gators!
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