To trigger interest...or stay a loser.(long) (dating, mother-in-law, women)

[SwedishViking]

I'm gonna try to make my point as short and concise as possible, without putting focus on me personally,

Spoiler

as those discussions usually don't lead anywhere else than the usual useless advice about "getting a gym-membership", "improving oneself", "wait and a girl will come" etc.

Everything below is thus in general terms, and that your friend or a specific former-dogs-first-owners-cousins-mother-in-laws-late-husband managed to be an exception is irrelevant. We're talking general numbers.

So I have a theory that these women-problems that dateless guys have aren't really women problems but rather "social management" problems.

I'm guessing that the poll above is going to show that guys who are successfull with women are also successfull verbal communicators within a group.

I'm guessing that guys who have problems attracting/dating women generally have problems in keeping up an interesting conversation. So what makes a conversation interesting?
I think the quick answer here is "content", but while content has bearing it's not what I think differs the typical dateless guy from the successfull alpha.
Just think about it; some people can drag out saying a whole bunch of nothing and keep his audience listening willingly. My bet is that these males are desired as good company, both by women and men, and that women will be interesting in having a male with this characteristic for herself.
Others may have something profound to add to a conversation, but will first have trouble finding a window to actually say it, and will then have trouble not being interupted or listened to at all. My bet is that this type of person will not only be unsucceful i mating with women but will also typically be less surrounded by friends of any gender. Since women are more attuned communicatively they will sense the lower status of the failing communicator and will be even less inclined to listen than the surrounding men.
The success or failure of communicating will then also be projected as a part measurement what people call "confidence".

While the latter person may not miss the company of a tall number of friends, he will likely still suffer from the instinctive crave mating with women and the mental punishments these cravings put on a guy who's failing to satisfy his male instincts, and thus fails his own manhood.

So the question is; is the measurement of how interesting a male is characterized by his verbal technique(or lack there of) rather than what he actually has to offer? And is a male who fails at mating usually such because he is a failure in terms of flock-communication?

[WakaFlocka]

There's no middle ground in the poll. I'm not center stage and despise even the thought of being the center of attention, but I'm not socially unskilled either.

[SwedishViking]

Originally Posted by WakaFlocka

There's no middle ground in the poll. I'm not center stage and despise even the thought of being the center of attention, but I'm not socially unskilled either.

The pick the closest alternative :P I conciously chose not to have any middle alternative, because otherwise I could have million alternatives and still leave somebody uncovered.

[believe007]

Originally Posted by SwedishViking

I'm gonna try to make my point as short and concise as possible, without putting focus on me personally,

Spoiler

as those discussions usually don't lead anywhere else than the usual useless advice about "getting a gym-membership", "improving oneself", "wait and a girl will come" etc.

Everything below is thus in general terms, and that your friend or a specific former-dogs-first-owners-cousins-mother-in-laws-late-husband managed to be an exception is irrelevant. We're talking general numbers.

So I have a theory that these women-problems that dateless guys have aren't really women problems but rather "social management" problems.

I'm guessing that the poll above is going to show that guys who are successfull with women are also successfull verbal communicators within a group.

I'm guessing that guys who have problems attracting/dating women generally have problems in keeping up an interesting conversation. So what makes a conversation interesting?
I think the quick answer here is "content", but while content has bearing it's not what I think differs the typical dateless guy from the successfull alpha.
Just think about it; some people can drag out saying a whole bunch of nothing and keep his audience listening willingly. My bet is that these males are desired as good company, both by women and men, and that women will be interesting in having a male with this characteristic for herself.
Others may have something profound to add to a conversation, but will first have trouble finding a window to actually say it, and will then have trouble not being interupted or listened to at all. My bet is that this type of person will not only be unsucceful i mating with women but will also typically be less surrounded by friends of any gender. Since women are more attuned communicatively they will sense the lower status of the failing communicator and will be even less inclined to listen than the surrounding men.
The success or failure of communicating will then also be projected as a part measurement what people call "confidence".

While the latter person may not miss the company of a tall number of friends, he will likely still suffer from the instinctive crave mating with women and the mental punishments these cravings put on a guy who's failing to satisfy his male instincts, and thus fails his own manhood.

So the question is; is the measurement of how interesting a male is characterized by his verbal technique(or lack there of) rather than what he actually has to offer? And is a male who fails at mating usually such because he is a failure in terms of flock-communication?

Well just getting in from my classes, so I just skimmed your post. Here's what I've noticed, though. Men who are smooth with the conversational skills, I'm very cautious of. They seem to have a game or agenda. So I find it nice when I meet a guy who isn't as polished with his verbal techniques; maybe he comes across as a little shy, or an introvert or even a loner. At least it doesn't seem like he's a player to me.

[Raena77]

I don't like women.