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Ok, but in OP's case, husband is overly defensive + winking emoticon is enough for suspicion. If it means nothing, it should't be a big deal to end the texting.
I would be overly defensive too if I were being made to feel like I've been doing something wrong. We don't know the whole story and based on what the OP said, it's not enough to hang the guy. So there was a winking emoticon...does that mean there's an affair going on? IMO though, if the texts overall make you feel uncomfortable, then sit down and discuss it with your husband and don't come off accusatory. As long as there's mutual respect, he should be mindful and ask the co-worker to stop texting and just ignore the texts from her. If the texts are not work related, then what is the reasonable explanation for the texts? Maybe the texts were completely innocent but he deleted them knowing you'd be upset? He may not be hiding them due to content (which could very well be innocent) but rather because he knows you'll get mad. BTW, does he not know that it all shows up in the bill? lol
Personally I'd like to know what the other posters think of him NOT intitating the texting. He made it a point to tell his wife that he never starts it. If the texts are somewhat inappropriate, but he's not initating, does that make him less guilty?
I get the occasional texts from clients, and all are innocuous. However, one person has begun texting me frequently about just anything. I'm watching it carefully and will probably tell her to stop if she steps over the line.
Personally I'd like to know what the other posters think of him NOT intitating the texting. He made it a point to tell his wife that he never starts it. If the texts are somewhat inappropriate, but he's not initating, does that make him less guilty?
No, because the fact that is hasn't done anything to stop them is a sign that he condones them.
We have one friend whose marriage is ending and another whose marriage is in trouble because texting/calls that were initially claimed to be innocent. Granted, there are other underlying issues in the marriages, but texting/calls were the first overt sign to their spouses.
Males, in general, won't/ don't usually engage or interact with females in this intimate (yes, texting is intimacy) way unless they have something else in mind; or they are hopeful something will/can develop out of it.
Your marriage is in trouble!
It all depends what is being text back and forth. It could be something stupid about work.
IMHO, work email is better for communicating work related stuff. Texting may be appropriate if the person does a lot of work related travel, but even emails can be checked on your phone.
I had a working wife once. She was borderline inappropriate at times, but mostly we would talk about our relationships and desires. Never once did it reach any sort of cheating. I doubt its just work related since he is deleting the messages and since you saw a smiley. However, I would caution that you approach him carefully because a nagging wife is definitely going to drive him away. I think a little bit of outside flirtation can be healthy for a relationship as long as both parties know where the line is.
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Males, in general, won't/ don't usually engage or interact with females in this intimate (yes, texting is intimacy) way unless they have something else in mind;
or they are hopeful something will/can develop out of it. 
