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who knows, I broke up with this guy one time and he would not leave me alone - he would follow me everywhere, he found out what bar I was at one night and somehow cut the wires or did something outside the bar to the electrical box and shut down all the power to the bar - me and about 200 people had to go to the bar across the street.
Finally, I had to let my dad take care of it
Sounds like an obcession that started before the breakup.
At first, my divorce was harsh. He never thought I would function on my own after all those years of not being allowed to work. Boy, was he ever wrong! Though now we get along better than before though. He and his family still call me family, which makes me feel pretty good.
In this modern day, it doesnt surprise me that someone would put trackers on your car, hidden taps on your home phone, have tracking devices on your cellphones, cameras in your car or house...but those type of guys are the ones youre GLAD you broke away from. And there are solutions to solve those problems.
ok, this is just a general question, but I have noticed that men and their ego tend to have a problem- even after divorce/separation....it seems they like to think they can still pull strings? Why??? I dont understand this at all. Especially when the healthiest option is to move on.....
sunny
I agree with what windchimes said. Most of the guys I hang out with (and I'm a guy) aren't of that nature, but it appears there are a large number of men that have a controlling nature. It's apparent from all of the posts on this board, and through my own personal experience.
I have found that most of the ones that are like this are usually insecure and feel inadequate. They have trust issues and so on. Anyone that is usually happy and confident in themselves (confident in a GOOD way) don't seem to have these issues. As for me, I've been dumped before, and the way I've always handled it was to brood and get depressed, thinking there was something wrong with me. Thesedays, I just realize that sometimes two people aren't meant to be together for some reason or another.
I never, ever wanted to manipulate and/or control. If someone didn't want to be around me, I definitely stayed clear and out of the way - even if I was heartbroken.
You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Synopsis again.
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Interesting to get a man's perspective on all this....In my case it seems he can never make a decision /hopefully he isnt reconsidering the divorce-lol- I have already made plans!
If someone didn't want to be around me, I definitely stayed clear and out of the way - even if I was heartbroken.
Makes two of us. Like everyone, I got the shaft a couple of times. But I just said ok and walked away. Someone does not want you, then they don't want you. I never saw the point in arguing about it. You win a few and lose a few. Did not make me less heartbroken, but I walked away with a bit of pride intact.
At the same time, I calmly rejected any of the inevitable overtures from the ex regarding "being friends" or "just checking in". What's done is done.
In my time, Ive known some men who I would have liked to have konked on the head because of how they reacted to a break-up they were going through. Some really make a spectacle of their ignorance dont they. I went thru one divorce many years ago, and like a lot of other men and women, I moped around for a couple of months there. I tried to not be where she was going to be, if I could avoid it. But, contrary to the statistics, I stayed single for almost twenty years (by choice), whereas she remarried after about a year. It was kinda funny though, after she and this other guy decided to get married, they sent me a wedding invitation. Now, Im not sure what their motive was here, but at the time, I felt like they were trying to get at me and so in return, I mailed him a sympathy card for his up-coming misery. They are now divorced, shes remarried AGAIN and lives a couple of states over from me. Im glad. But, I can honestly say that Ive never haressed any woman Ive ever dumped, or been dumped by. Do I get a gold star here?
You have given out too much Reputation in the last 24 hours, try again later.
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Yes, dennis58, a gold star as soon as tomorrow comes!... I guess its an individual thing but I dont believe in playing games- the control issues are so over- better to do things in a straightforward way....
I seriously question what my stbx thinks- I had a Labor day Weekend alone (like last year) only this year I am at the house, and realize I am living in a state we moved to for him- (his job, etc.)...Never a thank you or acknowledgement.... and now it seems he thinks that he may change his mind (Lets stay together-lol- that is not in the cards)
So I am stranded here for a year, but will be visiting NY or alternate places... I have relatives in Chicago- I just cannot believe how, in my situation, this man assumes that he can engineer my future- I already made the mistake of selling the Boca Raton house. This time my decision will be all mine....
Sunny - When you say you are "stranded" there for a year, I'm assuming you don't like where you are? If you don't, why do you have to wait a year to move? Is there some kind of law regarding divorce, or you just don't know where you want to go?
Last edited by DareToDream; 09-03-2007 at 12:52 PM..
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My two cents
