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Have you had any exes stay in touch in an unusual way?
I have an ex I dated off and on for a year and a half. He was the wrong fit, but we had great chemistry that made things last longer than they should have. I realized it wasn't a good use of time so I ended it.
And one of the big reasons I didn't see a future with him was really related to his life plan. He wanted to start a business (that is great!) or lots of businesses. The problem? His plan for me was to help him with his business. Two problems with that. I had no interest in any of his business ideas. I didn't want a new job.
He thought I should use my professional (ahem marketing) skills to help him build his business. So you know, we could build an empire together. It sounds like a cheesy line from a TV movie! And he always wanted to talk about it. So as you can imagine, I was over it.
We broke up amicably. But then I started getting emails from him, a monthly newsletter about his life happenings and business. This has been going on for a year now.
So my ex is marketing to me, and nurturing me over email. There isn't an unsubscribe link. And I know him, if I were to reply to say remove he would take it as a sign we should go out again.
My marketing coworkers thought this was pretty hilarious.
Fess up? Do you stay in contact with exes? How? Are you nurturing them?
Definitely never had anyone put me in the sales funnel! (That sounds like a euphemism...for what, I don't know.)
However, I actually got burned really badly by an ex several years after we broke up. I should note that the breakup itself was also really, really traumatic, so I guess I shouldn't have been surprised.
Anyway, here goes: my sister and I were roommates at the time, and for her birthday one year, I decided to get us bus tickets to New York (where this ex lived at the time) and tickets to a baseball game for the two of us and my ex, with whom I'd been exchanging "hey, how are you" kind of texts once every few weeks for about a year. This was my high school girlfriend, and then the two of them both went to college in Boston and had graduated at this point, so they had been good friends for a few years, even after we weren't together anymore. Since we seemed to be on good terms, I thought it would be a nice birthday present for my sister to have her come with us to the game.
The day of the game, my sister came out of her room and said she was too sick to travel. Seeing as I'd already bought the tickets, I decided I may as well go on the trip. When I got to NYC, it was absolutely pouring outside. I wasn't sure if the game was going to be canceled or not. My ex had the same thought, so she texted me to see what was going on. As soon as she heard that my sister wasn't with me, she cut off all communication. So I was in NYC by myself, caught in a downpour, and had like 6 or 7 hours until I could catch a bus back to Boston. As it turned out, the game did go on, I went on my own with my 3 tickets, and it was so cold because of the lingering drizzle that I didn't even make it through the 6th inning.
That was the last time I ever talked to that girl. But a couple of years later, she moved back to Boston and took the same route to work that I did. So about once every other week, we'd be on a rush hour train about 6 feet away from each other and had to kind of awkwardly pretend the other person didn't exist.
When a woman I am in a relationship with becomes an ex, it is absolutely over. There is no continued contact, I don't want to know what she is doing, who she is with and I make sure I am off her radar. It's done, later, don't call, text, email or even attempt to attach a note to a homing pigeon.
Then: What that does is indirectly set the stage for an ex to spend years trying to subconsciously replace what she misses with me. Eventually grow bored in her current relationship(s) and start to fantasize about a reunion.
And when that goes down after so long without contact, the first night back is always a total marathon sex, passion fueled reunion with no expectations or promises. It's amazing.
I stay in touch with a few, but at this point in life it's more of an acquaintances type of realtionship than anything resembling a close one.
We all have lives of our own now, even if one had a desire to become close again we are all in such different spots in life that it would be forced.
The only unusual way any of them tried to stay in touch was the occasional attempt to politely check in with me and see if I was not attached to anyone atm...we broke up for incompatibility issues but we where more than compatible in "other ways"
It didn't last long, I moved on and essentially shut her out of my life to respect my new partner. I don't think my now wife would have appreciated knowing I had someone who would come knocking only when she wanted to knock something else
I'm Facebook friends with an ex from high school. I will occasionally comment on one of his posts, he may occasionally like something of mine, but that's the extent of it. He and one other guy from high school are the only exes I have and I've often wondered what it would be like to have an ex from adulthood roaming around out there.
I'm close friends with my first significant ex-boyfriend and his wife. In fact, we are working on a doing a little show together right now - with a few other people as well. I just had dinner with them last week before our rehearsal. I consider him and his wife to be among my closest friends.
I want no contact with my ex. The only reason we would need to connect would be if something happened to our son. Other than that, she doesn't exist to me anymore. She has tried to reestablish contact , just recently, hinting at getting back together. I showed my lady the messages, and we both had a good laugh, after the shock wore off.
Lol, yea, get your arm bit off by an alligator, then offer him the other one? Don't think so....
I'm only cordial with a couple of my exes when I see them in passing. But when it's over, I write them off like a bad check.
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