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Part of the difference of opinion in this thread is because people view marriage differently.
Some here focus on it being a purely financial civil contract. A financial binding with someone, which can bring with it financial protections and risks (whether or not the contract is kept or disolved through divorce).
Some here view it is an emotional commitment. That there is a deeper meaning and purpose behind the marriage than just tying together of financial futures.
Others see it as a spiritual commitment.
Ultimately marriage will make sense for those people who value the commitments, obligations, and risks which it brings. Regardless of which particular area of commitment you focus on.
For instance, if your main concern and focus is the financial commitment of the civil contract, and you insist on a financial advantage to sign the contract regardless of any other aspects, then your likely only going to find value in marriage where it brings a financial advantage. (which can be in the form of assets, income, tax advantages, health care savings, etc).
Equally, if your deeply, spiritually and emotionally in love with someone, and want to make a commitment to them beyond just your word, you may find value in a marriage contract. Unlike a person's mere word, it is an action which backs up that word by tieing yourself into a civil contract which is not easily broken. It is a display and action of commitment by taking on the obligation of the contract. So if an illness, financial difficulty, emotional difficulty, etc, occures, your partner knows you are committed through contract, and not free to split at a moments notice. (Not saying that happens in an LTR, but it could happen... my wife knows I am far more committed because I willingly entered into the civil contract).
Like any other contract we could enter into, we choose which ones meet are wants, needs, and desires. Not just which is the going to give us the greatest pure financial benefit beyond all other interests.
I have no leverage with them. It's like telling your boss you're going to take a month off from work without their authorization.
No offense, but it is time to grow a pair. You said your 30? Your parents need to let you grow up and run your own life. You need to learn you have your own life to live and not be planning it around what pleases your parents at the expense of your own happiness and satisfaction.
We all have to leave the nest at some point.
Do you still live at home? I do not understand how they can make your life so miserable on a daily basis that you would do their bidding and be miserable?
No offense, but it is time to grow a pair. You said your 30? Your parents need to let you grow up and run your own life. You need to learn you have your own life to live and not be planning it around what pleases your parents at the expense of your own happiness and satisfaction.
We all have to leave the nest at some point.
Do you still live at home? I do not understand how they can make your life so miserable on a daily basis that you would do their bidding and be miserable?
It's an inheritance issue with me in addition to making my folks happy.
And no, I don't live at home. I just graduated from grad school in May, I'm currently living in the NYC area, and I start my job as a management consultant (senior consultant) next Monday.
It's an inheritance issue with me in addition to making my folks happy.
And no, I don't live at home. I just graduated from grad school in May, I'm currently living in the NYC area, and I start my job as a management consultant (senior consultant) next Monday.
My only reply would be that you can have all the money in the world, but cannot take any of it with you. Money can open more opportunities for you to see and do interesting things, but money doesn't make any one happy. Since you have a good career in front of you anyway, I would veer towards making your own decisions so you are happy, irregardless of a potential inheritance. A way back you said you figured to be making $200K plus a year in the near future. You will have more than enough money to do all kinds of interesting things. However, none of it will matter if your locked into making decisions only to please others.
My only reply would be that you can have all the money in the world, but cannot take any of it with you. Money can open more opportunities for you to see and do interesting things, but money doesn't make any one happy. Since you have a good career in front of you anyway, I would veer towards making your own decisions so you are happy, irregardless of a potential inheritance. A way back you said you figured to be making $200K plus a year in the near future. You will have more than enough money to do all kinds of interesting things. However, none of it will matter if your locked into making decisions only to please others.
Yep
When money is the be all and end all of importance in your life you will forever be a slave to it - and rob yourself of the most important aspects of life.
My only reply would be that you can have all the money in the world, but cannot take any of it with you. Money can open more opportunities for you to see and do interesting things, but money doesn't make any one happy. Since you have a good career in front of you anyway, I would veer towards making your own decisions so you are happy, irregardless of a potential inheritance. A way back you said you figured to be making $200K plus a year in the near future. You will have more than enough money to do all kinds of interesting things. However, none of it will matter if your locked into making decisions only to please others.
Are you serious?? lol
If someone gave me $25 million right now, ALL of my problems would be solved and I'd be able to live the life I've always wanted. I'd be a very happy camper.
When money is the be all and end all of importance in your life you will forever be a slave to it - and rob yourself of the most important aspects of life.
I need money to do the things I want to do, though. I'll be a slave to money until i have more than I know what to do with.
If someone gave me $25 million right now, ALL of my problems would be solved and I'd be able to live the life I've always wanted. I'd be a very happy camper.
You wouldn't be happy of the money comes with strings attached.
You wouldn't be happy of the money comes with strings attached.
Depends on what kind of strings.
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