Who pays for the date if you don't see another one happening? (dates, man)
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So, I went on a blind date with someone. He wouldn't let me pay for dinner or dessert. I have zero chemistry with this person and don't want to lead him on...
I feel really bad that I let him pay. I offered and he adamantly refused. I thought arguing with him further and insisting that we split it might have led to him feeling bad.
So, I went on a blind date with someone. He wouldn't let me pay for dinner or dessert. I have zero chemistry with this person and don't want to lead him on...
I feel really bad that I let him pay. I offered and he adamantly refused. I thought arguing with him further and insisting that we split it might have led to him feeling bad.
Is there ever a solution?
You did what I would have done. You tried to pay your share but he refused. I think that his act was gentlemanly btw. In any event, don't feel bad.
Him paying for your meal doesn't mean you owe him anything and if he takes it the wrong way, that's his own fault. It'd be one thing if you never offered to pay for yourself and expected him to do so... but you didn't. It is considered rude to argue over who is going to pay. Offer to pay, if he refuses and insists on paying for you, the polite thing to do is let it go. This applies to all social situations, not just a date.
If a man chooses to pay, he does so with full knowledge that there may not be a second date. In a blind date situation, he has no reason, really, to think it would, with any certainty. If this is something you feel strongly about, then you could bring it up ahead of time, when the details of the date are being set. You can say you feel more comfortable on a first date or blind date, splitting the bill. And if he insists on treating, well, so be it.
Even if I could see that a date won't lead to another date, I'll still pay. It's the classy and gentlemanly thing to do, especially since I was the one asking the person out. You're not leading him on at all.
What IS taking advantage is when you know that you want nothing to do with the guy but still accept date after date from him with him paying for them. First date is ok, but don't use a guy for more dates if you don't want anything to do with him.
So, I went on a blind date with someone. He wouldn't let me pay for dinner or dessert. I have zero chemistry with this person and don't want to lead him on...
I feel really bad that I let him pay. I offered and he adamantly refused. I thought arguing with him further and insisting that we split it might have led to him feeling bad.
Is there ever a solution?
I'm not sure I understand your question. Are you suggesting that a person should only pay for a date if they are assured of a repeat? Huh??
To be honest, I have tried to pay (and paid) in more casual situations, when I didn't want to give the guy any ideas. That usually happens when they're friends and we've just agreed to go out together. I wouldn't do it when invited strictly on a date, though.
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