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Buying a house IS a big deal. There's tons of paperwork that the bank is always asking for even though you submitted it 3 times. There's a matter of title and permit searches...it's draining. He does have a lot on his plate and you're doing great by not asking about the relationship. When hubby and I were dating, there was a time when he had so much going on that he couldn't make time for me. We did split up but it wasn't for long (less than a month). He needed time to sort things out and it had absolutely nothing to do with me. Your BF works fulltime, is in a new state so probably doesn't know that many people or have family/friends for support and he's trying to buy a house. Everything will fall into place. I agree with Carlitasway-maybe you can visit him? I'm sure it will be a nice surprise for him
Then when you find out he is just stressed of the move and the house you will look like an a$$ for thinking that.
Jealousy and false accusations kill a relationship. Love is what builds on trust and loyalty. That of which this young lady has done.
I agree that she handled it correctly, actually. I just wouldn't be gearing up to move out his way yet. i don't think she should accuse him of anything, I guess sometimes when people are under the stress of buying a house and being in a new location they grow distant and push people they care about away. I do understand that, it is strange to me that he feels he can't lean on her, but everyone's different. I was just thinking, 10 months into a relationship, now it's become a LDR (with plans to move) and he's withdrawing from her...doesn't sound like he really wants her out there. But I could be, and hopefully am, wrong.
Don't read too much into it (more than what he's saying). If you start wondering if he's about the end the relationship, this might bring added pressure. If I were in your shoes, I would visit him (if possible). You'd be surprise how that could make the world of difference. Telling him you're there versus showing him are two different things. Good luck and let us know what happened.
I agree with everyone else. When I'm upset I want to talk it out. I talk to whoever I'm dating or my friends or family, but not everyone does that. Some people just want to be left alone to sort things out for themselves. I think your response was perfect! Letting him know you're there for him but if he needs some space that's cool too. That said - if he doesn't get back into boyfriend mode in the next few weeks I would reevaluate. A little space is fine, but ignoring you for weeks isn't!
honeymel12...I'm thinking he's kinda feeling pretty low...the house thing is part...but you being so far away and not wanting to join him is really making him feel that everythings "piling in on him at once"...I don't think he's breaking up with you...but I'm thinking maybe he's feeling that you are breaking up with him.
If you posted this in the wee hours of Thursday night/Friday morning, that means you hadn't spoken to him in four days. I can't imagine having a serious boyfriend who didn't talk to me at all for several days at a time, and vice versa, because I wouldn't go four days without talking to someone I loved, especially if he's under stress. The whole point of a relationship is to be there for each other, if not physically, then emotionally, right? Something is wrong. Maybe you've been dumped, but indirectly.
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