Relearning to live (pickup, kids, divorce, relations)
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Sorry to hear of the trouble OP. She was likely seeing him for a lot longer given he moved in. Sometimes all you can do is start over, and in this case care for your kids as this will no doubt be tough on them. You sound like. A stand up guy who wanted to take an opportunity to make a better quality of life for you and the family
Best of luck with everything and may this be a new chapter and start for you. All the best.
I agree with Scott. She probably had an affaire or knew him before that all happend. I still can not understsnd why someone would do that. I mean you were/are trying to improve the situation of your family, which results in a better future for you, your wife and your kids. I hope that you will work it out somehow, since you deserve muuuuchhh better than that.
I was in a similar situation. I had to pretend that I was really in the situation I was in, rather than the one wanted to be in. In reality, I was going through a divorce that I couldn't accept. So, I had to force myself to act like a single male who wanted some female company. It was hard at first and then it got easier as I became more successful at it. I never moved back to my old home, but I did regain the love of my children because I did truly love them. I eventually married a local girl and we are still together after 14 years, as of today. End of story.
I am sorry too but I suspect she was also seeing someone before you left.
Now.. We had a member here who was also latino and he had a similar situation. He was also devastated but he didn't push it and started dating others. It took a few months but all of a sudden she realized that what she really wanted was to be with him again. You now sometimes around 20 years we get complacent and don't realize that there were warning signs but you chose to ignore it. The romance is complacent and we get stuck in a rut.
Will it happen for you, maybe.. maybe not. The point is you need to get out and see other people. There are a lot of meetup groups for all kind of things. Some are for singles who meet for happy hour and then dinner, others go to clubs, others are for specific interest.
I also agree you need to have a face to face and then serve her with papers. Sometimes it helps when reality sets in
You have choices. You can become bitter or find a way to see this as a gift. A DO-OVER. Or at least as close as you will ever come to getting one. And you live in Vegas! Me too. I can't think of a better place to be to have a good time and enjoy your freedom.
It won't happen today or tomorrow, but eventually you will probably realize she did you a favor!
You have choices. You can become bitter or find a way to see this as a gift. A DO-OVER. Or at least as close as you will ever come to getting one. And you live in Vegas! Me too. I can't think of a better place to be to have a good time and enjoy your freedom.
It won't happen today or tomorrow, but eventually you will probably realize she did you a favor!
Thanks yellowsnow. You are probably right, it's just hard to see it that way.
If it is a no fault divorce state, it doesn't matter who cheated, she will still get half and could get alimony. Hopefully it is in a state where the time she gets it is limited. NC is 18 months max.
I suggest these things:
1) start a diet and exercise program, get back in shape
2) improve self image
3) find some hobbies and groups to enjoy them with (example - meetup group for hiking, pickup basketball group etc)
4) rediscover who you are
How old are the kids?
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