Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Wow!! Very Sad indeed. I agree with all the previous responses. However, I can't help wondering if you'd communicated your feelings to her. What were your (both of you) intentions? Was this a serious committed relationship? I know you've been together for 4 years, but it seems one sided. (not giving her a pass). Did you guys talk about a future? That was an abrupt ending to a long relationship. It just doesn't make sense. Could it have been a misunderstanding?
As others have said, now is the time to occupy your time and dive into your studies. Time heals all wounds. Learn from this. I'm sure the right woman will come along and stop being so so nice!! I get the feeling that you are very laid back and easy going. Strengthen that back bone. Speak up in your next relationship so that you know where you stand. I wish you all the best.
Wow!! Very Sad indeed. I agree with all the previous responses. However, I can't help wondering if you'd communicated your feelings to her. What were your (both of you) intentions? Was this a serious committed relationship? I know you've been together for 4 years, but it seems one sided. (not giving her a pass). Did you guys talk about a future? That was an abrupt ending to a long relationship. It just doesn't make sense. Could it have been a misunderstanding?
This response assumes that she is a nice girl with good values. Based on what I read in his post, that does not appear to be the case. The chick was obviously using him. His only mistake, imo, was not recognizing it sooner and ending it much earlier. But it is true that this is a good lesson.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AverageGuy2006
I would avoid contact with her. If she calls, don't answer. If she texts, dont't respond.
This. I strongly suggest never speaking to her again and meeting new women.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jdwis
Thanks CaptainJack87, I like your name, I am a fan of Captain Jack Sparrow (Pirates of caribbean).
Well, I'm a captain in the military and my name is Jack, but thanks anyway. I like Captain Jack Sparrow too. LOL
She sound pretty cold, and was not interested in a permanent relationship. Sounds like she considered you a FWB, and maybe not even that with the exchange of funds for sex. I think you may have wanted it to be a lot more than she ever did.
I would avoid contact with her. If she calls, don't answer. If she texts, dont't respond.
If you havent had the official "this relationship is over" talk, then by all means, communicate to her that the relationship isn't working for you. But she may try to tell you she will change....but ai think the adjustments required are far too great for you to ever feel appreciated.
I am sure she is not going to call or text as she is stubborn and I am not going to do the same as well as I am quite stubborn & firm to my decision of not going further. It was just I was worried about her as she does goes to extreme sometimes to get her things. Do you think would that be ok?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Prairieparson
She sound pretty cold, and was not interested in a permanent relationship. Sounds like she considered you a FWB
Sorry my friend what do u mean by FWB? is it Fu**** With Buddies or something else sorry dont know the meaning.
I am sure she is not going to call or text as she is stubborn and I am not going to do the same as well as I am quite stubborn & firm to my decision of not going further. It was just I was worried about her as she does goes to extreme sometimes to get her things. Do you think would that be ok?
You should not concern yourself with "what if" inregards to her. She is a grown woman, and she will carry on, just as she did before you came along.
It is in your benefit that she never contacts you again. And please don't break, give in, and contact her. She will see your weakness, and use you worse than before, and it will hurt so much worse. That is a lesson you don't want to experience.
Sorry my friend what do u mean by FWB? is it Fu**** With Buddies or something else sorry dont know the meaning.
FWB = friends with benefits = friends that have sex even though they are not in a monogomous relationship.
I think she has moved on. If she wanted you back, she would have made an attempt to reconnect. If the relationship has been going downhill for a year, you might as well accept that it's over.
I'm sorry you are in so much pain because you seem like a good person. Theres not much you can do except endure. The bad feelings could persist for a number of months. Speaking fom experience, you will eventually recover and become a normal, undamaged person again. Staying busy, finding new friends, meditating, exercise and healthy habits will speed the process along. All the other things will make you feel worse.
It would be a good time to travel or start an ambitious project, if you're able to.
your life is what you make it, and right now it sounds like you are making it nothing but misery for yourself. get out, do something productive and get your mind off of things and start enjoying yourself and your life again.
that is all you can do. you're the only one with any power in changing the outlook on life for yourself
Last edited by rego00123; 08-25-2012 at 04:15 AM..
You know what guys, you are right. I do need to get involved in something else. Me being in IT for long, I need to recap things – hardware & software both. Its just bloody at this time I cannot just concentrate on anything else, but I am just trying it, but before that I also need to reach a state by mind where I could just concentrate and release the negative energy of stupid thoughts. Hope I do that soon.
I have profile on a dating site and came across this thread – “Stop being so demanding in your dating profile! (girls, child support, internet)”… its just great… fantastic.. I like it… I was just reading almost all the post and keeping myself busy in something. I am so happy that we have so many people here who are really actively involved in such a nice open discussion and real world problems with real lives… that thread is so damn practical, un deniable… Its just good.
I am so glad I happen to find this site, seriously thanks to all you guys who helped answered my OP, helping me in thinking straight, in most possible best way ,also just to reply on those posts where I was asked if I could do few things seeing age, but luckily, yes I can, being quite healthy, I can do. Thanks guys.
One thing just keeps coming in my mind; I sometime wonder would she have not done this intentionally to make me free from her life so that I could carry on, on making my own life the way I want? Because I did raise some points like that in the past, but I also mentioned that if our things broke in a bad way then I don’t know what I would do. But on the other go, from quite some time like say a year or so she was in denial of everything I was doing which was kind of generously appreciated by the outside world ( I mean her rest of the family around).???
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I get the feeling that you are very laid back and easy going. Strengthen that back bone. Speak up in your next relationship so that you know where you stand. I wish you all the best.
sorry dont know the meaning.
