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I have to find a woman attractive in order to date her. Attractiveness is not the ONLY thing that matters to me... personality and sense of humor are very important as well. But I need to find a woman attractive, or else no matter how great her personality is, it does not really matter. Attractiveness is like a prerequisite. At the risk of sounding superficial, I think most men who are honest will admit the same.
A lot of women say that personality is the most important. So can the majority of women honestly say they would be happy with a man whose personality she likes but who she does not find physically attractive? Biologically speaking, it does not make sense to me... it would seem like women would have to be physically attracted to their mates, just as men do, in order for procreation and the human race to continue on. But yet a lot of women, both on this forum and elsewhere in life, say that personality is basically all that matters.
A lot of women say that personality is the most important. So can the majority of women honestly say they would be happy with a man whose personality she likes but who she does not find physically attractive? Biologically speaking, it does not make sense to me... it would seem like women would have to be physically attracted to their mates, just as men do, in order for procreation and the human race to continue on. But yet a lot of women, both on this forum and elsewhere in life, say that personality is basically all that matters.
Any thoughts?
Does not find physically attractive? Definitely not...But I will say that a man's personality can make him more attractive in her eyes.
But we are surely not starting off w/ some butt-ugly freaks here.
No...attraction is important to me. I've met lots of guys with great personalities but I didn't want to date them because I couldn't imagine kissing them. That said I've been with some guys that I had amazing spark and chemistry with but who weren't my usual type or classicly good looking. Attraction is subjection.
In terms of what's important to most women, it goes:
1. Looks
2. Social status/personality
3. Financial status
The only difference is that personality is very close behind looks for women whereas for men it's looks with personality very far down the latter.
Quote:
Originally Posted by D217
Does not find physically attractive? Definitely not...But I will say that a man's personality can make him more attractive in her eyes.
But we are surely not starting off w/ some butt-ugly freaks here.
Quote:
Originally Posted by strawberrykiki
No...attraction is important to me. I've met lots of guys with great personalities but I didn't want to date them because I couldn't imagine kissing them. That said I've been with some guys that I had amazing spark and chemistry with but who weren't my usual type or classicly good looking. Attraction is subjection.
Does not find physically attractive? Definitely not...But I will say that a man's personality can make him more attractive in her eyes.
But we are surely not starting off w/ some butt-ugly freaks here.
I agree.
A couple of years ago, I met two guys at an event. One was definitely cuter than the other and the type I find physically attractive. The other wasn't bad looking, just not what I'm drawn to. But by the end of the event, the one I found less attractive physically was the one I was more attracted to. He's the one that made me laugh.
As one who "well, she has a nice personality" applied to growing up, I do tend to try to look at the whole package, not just the wrapping. I have found some men to become more attractive as I've gotten to know them and some have gotten less. But, I could not date someone I did not find attractive.
Yes, looks are important. But, like I said in another post, attraction is subjective.
But in regards to attraction, no matter how attractive I may find a guy physically, if he has a bad personality (arrogant, boorish, conceited, etc.), the attraction level drops to zero, and I'm done. Personality is important...at least to THIS woman. I'm not materialistic...it doesn't matter to me how a guy dresses, or what kind of car he drives. He does need to be financially stable, but that doesn't mean he has to be rich...it means he has to be responsible with his finances.
Looks are as important to women as a woman’s financial status is for men…that is, looks are NOT THAT important for women but a man’s financial status is. For men, financial status is NOT THAT important but her being attractive to his eyes is. Sure, there are exceptions for both.
Everyone starts on some level. Your attractiveness however can go up or down based on your personality and other things. So a gorgeous guy can quickly become unattractive to us if he's a douche, and an ok or average looking guy can become handsome if he's an amazing person.
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