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We have not become more shallow, it has always been that way. Only now with the Internet more people know about it.
This. There was no such thing as a golden age of integrity or morality. Times when people were supposed to be more moral were in fact times of incredible violence and barbarity. Also, I wouldn't use the word shallow, but rather simply...human.
So my question is, are we as a society becoming more shallow, sacrificing meaningful interaction and communication with instant gratification/physically based relationships?
Maybe that's why I'm more comfortable dating someone within my age group or at least shares similar values.
It's what works for each individual. For some, the hook-up culture is fascinating. I bet it leaves a lot of people feeling empty afterwards hoping that they could find something meaningful. Doesn't mean filler, pseudo-relationships such as FWBs cannot suffice for some.
Factor in the fact that we have high rates of divorce and single-parent families with our current lifestyles, yes, I do think post-modern values do emphasize on people being seen as disposable based on ideals of instant gratification. It's just a mere illusion, far from what true happiness is about- which requires some level of integrity (personal, professional, society as a whole, etc).
I was thinking about this today after making some observations at work. It seems that there is a stereotype or myth that men generally are attracted to women's looks, while women are attracted to men's personality/social status. My theory is that this may have been more true in years past, but nowadays it is much more "even" in that women are drawn to men for their looks.
I say this because I have a co-worker who is a conventionally good looking guy. He's tall, blonde, and muscular. At work, women will approach him and ask him questions as an excuse to talk to him, and I've even seen a girl walk right up to him and give him her number. And yes, he had sex with her later that weekend.
Furthermore, my generation has a "hook up culture" in which people aren't dating formally (boyfriend/girlfriend) as much as are they having casual sex/friends with benefits. And many couples my age have one or both parties cheating on each other (again, from my personal observations at work and amongst my group of friends).
What I'm getting at is that this hook-up culture is very much based on pure sexual/physical attraction. There seems to be less of people getting to know each other in any meaningful way (personality), and just acting out their desires based purely on the other person's looks. I suspect this may also be why the divorce rate is so high and continues to climb.
So my question is, are we as a society becoming more shallow, sacrificing meaningful interaction and communication with instant gratification/physically based relationships?
My observations are exactly like yours. Women are be becoming more like men due to going to college, career first and being breadwinner. Many women in an unstable or stable career or in a college dont have time for a relationship which can cause damage for them and hinder any career advancement if one was to marry or have child, so it seems best to just hookup and call it a night. Also note many people of our generation probably come from a divorced suburban families or from inner city single mother household, witnessing these typez of relationships changed the way how we look at relationships and what we want out of it especially for those who are educated. Woman become more shallow because they choosed to be, its an even ball game now on in other words a two way street. Sad thing about the hookup culture is that its not backex by men but its mostly backed by women, eventually many women will become jaded if tgey continue to hookup with different men because at the end of the day women are emotional, one may fall for the guy while another will feel like a tramp.
I was thinking about this today after making some observations at work. It seems that there is a stereotype or myth that men generally are attracted to women's looks, while women are attracted to men's personality/social status. My theory is that this may have been more true in years past, but nowadays it is much more "even" in that women are drawn to men for their looks.
I say this because I have a co-worker who is a conventionally good looking guy. He's tall, blonde, and muscular. At work, women will approach him and ask him questions as an excuse to talk to him, and I've even seen a girl walk right up to him and give him her number. And yes, he had sex with her later that weekend.
Furthermore, my generation has a "hook up culture" in which people aren't dating formally (boyfriend/girlfriend) as much as are they having casual sex/friends with benefits. And many couples my age have one or both parties cheating on each other (again, from my personal observations at work and amongst my group of friends).
What I'm getting at is that this hook-up culture is very much based on pure sexual/physical attraction. There seems to be less of people getting to know each other in any meaningful way (personality), and just acting out their desires based purely on the other person's looks. I suspect this may also be why the divorce rate is so high and continues to climb.
So my question is, are we as a society becoming more shallow, sacrificing meaningful interaction and communication with instant gratification/physically based relationships?
I too, must agree with your statement. You've made a good observation and a good sociological study as well. Our culture/generation has become more of a physical attraction generation rather than what the person is on a personal level and their job. I see this amongst myself, friends, and just random individuals/couples in public. Although as also mentioned by other users of this forum, not all individuals are like that. There is a very attractive woman at my work that is dating a (for lack of a better term) not that good looking man. She likes him just the way he is, based on how he acts, treats her, etc.
To conclude my thought & reasoning, it seems more that if you've got the looks and body now-a-days you'll get the same group of individuals of the opposite sex.
i think the hookup culture exists become people allow it to exist. If women feel like men only want to hookup then they should try and seek a partner that doesnt and not give in to the men that are only looking to hook up. My roomates are guys that really dont care about women's feelings or are interested in anything other then hooking up. Its not really my cup of tea and the quality of women they go after is not high.
question is, are we as a society becoming more shallow, sacrificing meaningful interaction and communication with instant gratification/physically based relationships?
I agree with everything except the shallow part. I think normal men and women through the years have placed the same amount of weight on desiring someone who is physically attractive to them (with said attraction being subjective, of course). Gold-diggers not withstanding, of course.
I think the standard for normal/healthy/attractive have gotten very narrow a la _Brave New World_. I was raised on stories about people who were real characters and didn't fit into the neat little concepts of normal that we have now. I've never preferred "perfect" people in friends, family, or intimate partners. They always have a mix of 'good' and 'bad'. I would really like to see a more open culture in which people are more accepting of difference and appreciate uniqueness.
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