One thing I'm starting to notice, women finding a man/attribute unattractive in a man because it's 'gay' (wives, lover)

[Ascension2012]

Originally Posted by Tex?Il?

although masculine is still a very fluid concept. And encompasses a lot.

The key I think is confidence, being yourself and not caring what others think.

I mean just look at musicians/singers, etc. They don't give a crap what others think, a more masculine trait, even though they have pushed the edges of mens fashion.

Many women I think are attracted to men who are secure enough in their masculinity to be ok with being stylish, etc. I mean just look at all those R&B artists, with their jewelry, etc. That alone on wimpy, wussy guys would not be masculine. But they have the attitude to back it up.

I think what some women might be turned off to as being feminine, other women might be turned on, because the guy just wears what he wants and doesn't give a crap what others think.

Being masculine or feminine has really nothing to do with the clothes you wear. You are right confidence is the most important masculine trait

[Trimac20]

Originally Posted by Tex?Il?

although masculine is still a very fluid concept. And encompasses a lot.

The key I think is confidence, being yourself and not caring what others think.

I mean just look at musicians/singers, etc. They don't give a crap what others think, a more masculine trait, even though they have pushed the edges of mens fashion.

Many women I think are attracted to men who are secure enough in their masculinity to be ok with being stylish, etc. I mean just look at all those R&B artists, with their jewelry, etc. That alone on wimpy, wussy guys would not be masculine. But they have the attitude to back it up.

I think what some women might be turned off to as being feminine, other women might be turned on, because the guy just wears what he wants and doesn't give a crap what others think.

Ha, exactly. If men didn't care what others think they wouldn't be constantly worried if something is 'gay' or not. I've even heard some men worry if wearing flip-flops is 'gay.'

[ChessieMom]

Originally Posted by Tex?Il?

although masculine is still a very fluid concept. And encompasses a lot.

The key I think is confidence, being yourself and not caring what others think.

I mean just look at musicians/singers, etc. They don't give a crap what others think, a more masculine trait, even though they have pushed the edges of mens fashion.

Many women I think are attracted to men who are secure enough in their masculinity to be ok with being stylish, etc. I mean just look at all those R&B artists, with their jewelry, etc. That alone on wimpy, wussy guys would not be masculine. But they have the attitude to back it up.

I think what some women might be turned off to as being feminine, other women might be turned on, because the guy just wears what he wants and doesn't give a crap what others think.

I'm gonna disagree here...a bit. I am a woman that likes masculine men...at least romantically speaking. I would have no romantic interest in a man that exhibits effeminate behavior, traits, or appearance. However, someone that "doesn't give a crap what others think" won't appeal to me either. I am all for confidence, and being yourself....but pushing "attitude" to the point of showing no care whatsoever as to what sort of impression one makes on others, well, that's completely unappealing to me as well.

[ChessieMom]

Originally Posted by Trimac20

So because it's common makes it okay?

Not because it's common, but because it is understood...routinely...in most every group of people. Except by you of course.

Originally Posted by Trimac20

It's still equating gay with bad.

No, it isn't.

Originally Posted by Trimac20

I'm talking about when people say 'that's so gay' to refer to ANYTHING that is bad. What if you said 'that's so black' or 'that's so Jew?'

Well now you've changed your story. And frankly, I don't know anyone that uses it in that context.

[ChessieMom]

Originally Posted by Trimac20

How do you explain the fact in the past that many of the alpha males also had sex with other males, as a means of bonding?

That didn't turn off females. Being weak and non-alpha did, and that never included male on male action.

And you know this....how?

[ja1myn]

Originally Posted by UnexpectedError

Saying "Dude, those pink pants make you look really gay, you better go change." is using it as a slur.

But let's face it, pink pants on a dude is kinda gay.

[ChessieMom]

Originally Posted by ja1myn

But let's face it, pink pants on a dude is kinda gay.

Exactly!!!

[Tex?Il?]

Originally Posted by ChessieMom

I'm gonna disagree here...a bit. I am a woman that likes masculine men...at least romantically speaking. I would have no romantic interest in a man that exhibits effeminate behavior, traits, or appearance. However, someone that "doesn't give a crap what others think" won't appeal to me either. I am all for confidence, and being yourself....but pushing "attitude" to the point of showing no care whatsoever as to what sort of impression one makes on others, well, that's completely unappealing to me as well.

I was actually referring more to specifically, men who put more effort into their appearance and having a unique sense of style, but not worrying if other might think its seen as looking "gay."

Thats what I meant by not giving a crap.

[ChessieMom]

Originally Posted by Tex?Il?

I was actually referring more to specifically, men who put more effort into their appearance and having a unique sense of style, but not worrying if other might think its seen as looking "gay."

Thats what I meant by not giving a crap.

Ah. Sorry, I misinterpreted.

[UnexpectedError]

Originally Posted by ja1myn

But let's face it, pink pants on a dude is kinda gay.

Not at all. But then, I've known men that could be manly in a pink tutu. Homosexuality really has zero to do with the way you dress and groom yourself.