Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Seems like most people go on a few dates to determine whether someone is right for them or not. Well I must be in the minority in that I must be friends with someone first before I know whether we're compatible enough to date because I think a few dates can't tell you too much about someone. Yes you get to know them as you date but it makes it too awkward for me because I'll have expectations and have anxiety about who else they're seeing or if they like me or where is this going? Whereas with friends, it takes the pressure off and I won't really care if they're seeing other people. One of the best relationship I've been in was when we were just friends for 6 months before anything happened. Yes we flirted and it was obvious we liked each other, and we were going out as friends, but it wasn't until one day when I was having dinner by myself that I wanted to have dinner with them when I realized I wanted to date them. I had another bf at that time too so of course I didn't think I wanted to date him until it was too late and the feelings had sunk in. How am I supposed to survive in today's dating world if I view dating as blah until we become friends, but most people, once they're in the friend zone, they don't want to date anymore. I need to have a strong connection with someone before I even think we should be dating. That might be why in the past I usually jump from one to two real dates to someone's girlfriend because we already knew each other. But it doesn't work that way with normal people. I seem to work the opposite as most people nowadays.
Just do what works for you. All that matters is the results and you feel comfortable. Anything else would just be arguing semantics and anecdotal examples.
Seems like most people go on a few dates to determine whether someone is right for them or not. Well I must be in the minority in that I must be friends with someone first before I know whether we're compatible enough to date because I think a few dates can't tell you too much about someone. Yes you get to know them as you date but it makes it too awkward for me because I'll have expectations and have anxiety about who else they're seeing or if they like me or where is this going? Whereas with friends, it takes the pressure off and I won't really care if they're seeing other people. One of the best relationship I've been in was when we were just friends for 6 months before anything happened.Yes we flirted and it was obvious we liked each other, and we were going out as friends, but it wasn't until one day when I was having dinner by myself that I wanted to have dinner with them when I realized I wanted to date them. I had another bf at that time too so of course I didn't think I wanted to date him until it was too late and the feelings had sunk in. How am I supposed to survive in today's dating world if I view dating as blah until we become friends, but most people, once they're in the friend zone, they don't want to date anymore. I need to have a strong connection with someone before I even think we should be dating. That might be why in the past I usually jump from one to two real dates to someone's girlfriend because we already knew each other. But it doesn't work that way with normal people. I seem to work the opposite as most people nowadays.
I've tried that too, but I've been rejected every time.
The WORST kind of pain. Worse than getting dumped.
Seems like most people go on a few dates to determine whether someone is right for them or not. Well I must be in the minority in that I must be friends with someone first before I know whether we're compatible enough to date because I think a few dates can't tell you too much about someone. Yes you get to know them as you date but it makes it too awkward for me because I'll have expectations and have anxiety about who else they're seeing or if they like me or where is this going? Whereas with friends, it takes the pressure off and I won't really care if they're seeing other people. One of the best relationship I've been in was when we were just friends for 6 months before anything happened. Yes we flirted and it was obvious we liked each other, and we were going out as friends, but it wasn't until one day when I was having dinner by myself that I wanted to have dinner with them when I realized I wanted to date them. I had another bf at that time too so of course I didn't think I wanted to date him until it was too late and the feelings had sunk in. How am I supposed to survive in today's dating world if I view dating as blah until we become friends, but most people, once they're in the friend zone, they don't want to date anymore. I need to have a strong connection with someone before I even think we should be dating. That might be why in the past I usually jump from one to two real dates to someone's girlfriend because we already knew each other. But it doesn't work that way with normal people. I seem to work the opposite as most people nowadays.
As long as you realize that severely restricts the number of people you can date.
People make dating way to stressful. It's just getting to know someone.
Seems like most people go on a few dates to determine whether someone is right for them or not. Well I must be in the minority in that I must be friends with someone first before I know whether we're compatible enough to date because I think a few dates can't tell you too much about someone. Yes you get to know them as you date but it makes it too awkward for me because I'll have expectations and have anxiety about who else they're seeing or if they like me or where is this going? Whereas with friends, it takes the pressure off and I won't really care if they're seeing other people. One of the best relationship I've been in was when we were just friends for 6 months before anything happened. Yes we flirted and it was obvious we liked each other, and we were going out as friends, but it wasn't until one day when I was having dinner by myself that I wanted to have dinner with them when I realized I wanted to date them. I had another bf at that time too so of course I didn't think I wanted to date him until it was too late and the feelings had sunk in. How am I supposed to survive in today's dating world if I view dating as blah until we become friends, but most people, once they're in the friend zone, they don't want to date anymore. I need to have a strong connection with someone before I even think we should be dating. That might be why in the past I usually jump from one to two real dates to someone's girlfriend because we already knew each other. But it doesn't work that way with normal people. I seem to work the opposite as most people nowadays.
The problem with deciding if someone is right after a just meeting and having a few dates, is that you just see a window of who they are. Everything is assumed or you have to believe what they say on those few dates, some of which are lies or just an inaccurate version of stories.
You can date someone longer if you want, if you didn't know them first. I don't think it's a good idea to be that serious about someone you have only seen a few times. No matter how into them you are, they were just a stranger just a few weeks before.
People make dating way to stressful. It's just getting to know someone.
This.
If you treat dating the exact same way that you treat forming new friendships, it would remove so much unnecessary anxiety and stress. All a relationship is, is a "friendship plus".
There are no "rules", it isn't a "game". There is no right or wrong way to do it, just like there is no right or wrong way to form a friendship.
The problem with deciding if someone is right after a just meeting and having a few dates, is that you just see a window of who they are. Everything is assumed or you have to believe what they say on those few dates, some of which are lies or just an inaccurate version of stories.
You can date someone longer if you want, if you didn't know them first. I don't think it's a good idea to be that serious about someone you have only seen a few times. No matter how into them you are, they were just a stranger just a few weeks before.
Exactly. And the highlighted is exactly why people probably should NOT be scre-wing each other after three dates. But, they do it all the time, and the men damn near expect it. Esspecially the C-D'rs here. HA!
Seems like most people go on a few dates to determine whether someone is right for them or not. Well I must be in the minority in that I must be friends with someone first before I know whether we're compatible enough to date because I think a few dates can't tell you too much about someone. Yes you get to know them as you date but it makes it too awkward for me because I'll have expectations and have anxiety about who else they're seeing or if they like me or where is this going? Whereas with friends, it takes the pressure off and I won't really care if they're seeing other people. One of the best relationship I've been in was when we were just friends for 6 months before anything happened. Yes we flirted and it was obvious we liked each other, and we were going out as friends, but it wasn't until one day when I was having dinner by myself that I wanted to have dinner with them when I realized I wanted to date them. I had another bf at that time too so of course I didn't think I wanted to date him until it was too late and the feelings had sunk in. How am I supposed to survive in today's dating world if I view dating as blah until we become friends, but most people, once they're in the friend zone, they don't want to date anymore. I need to have a strong connection with someone before I even think we should be dating. That might be why in the past I usually jump from one to two real dates to someone's girlfriend because we already knew each other. But it doesn't work that way with normal people. I seem to work the opposite as most people nowadays.
Friends first is a fine idea in theory, and it seems to work quite well for many women. However, it often fails in practice for men. The reason is simple: most single, desirable women are being pursued by more than one man at any given time. If a man takes it slow, if he tries to be friends first, he will usually end up being pushed aside by another man who is more aggressive. You say the best relationship you ever had went on for 6 months before anything happened? That's great. I am glad it worked out for you. But as men, we usually learn the hard way we just don't have that much time.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
All that matters is the results and you feel comfortable. Anything else would just be arguing semantics and anecdotal examples.
