Coupons and dating (man, restaurant, honest, like)
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I'm going on a second date with a guy this weekend. Today he says he has a coupon for a restaurant he wants to take me to. I'm all about coupons and saving money, but why would you share that with your date? Is he testing me to see if I'm a gold digger? Thoughts? Ladies, would you date a guy who did this?
Sounds to me like he's communicating with you, and being honest. I would think of it less as a test, and more like "putting his cards on the table, being honest, and letting it be what it is".
So the question is, does that bother you or not. If it does, then you're probably not meant for each other, if it doesn't, then go on the date.
This is our second date. He won't tell me what he actually does for a living. We talked about cars - we both drive Honda's and he made it a point to show me a google pic of his car. I've known a few male friends test women this way. In the dating scene today, I don't know anymore! *shrugs*
I'm not saying he IS testing you. I just wouldn't want to be with someone who is that manipulative.
But the fact that he WON'T tell you something as basic and important as what he does for a living is less than ideal. That's how you spend the majority of your day! It's a big part of who you are.
If you like the guy and had fun on the first date, go out on the second date and see how he acts. If he starts playing games, though, make that the last date.
The coupon thing would not bother me, especially since I don't think it was a test at all and instead was simply a guy speaking his mind without understanding that some people over-analyze and assign too much meaning to irrelevant things.
I would however be bothered by a man who refused to tell me what he does for a living. Most likely this isn't a wealthy man looking to sweep you off your feet, if only you prove yourself worthy. That's a fantasy that probably won't come true.
I appreciate all the opinions. I'm not looking for a Prince Charming, I pay for everything I need and want. However, I do want an equal, someone on the same page as myself and not below. It does bother me that he won't tell me what he does. All he's said is that his company is going out of business and he might return to practicing law. Which is awful because I refused to date anymore lawyers. Truly horrible people, they are! (Yoda voice)
I appreciate all the opinions. I'm not looking for a Prince Charming, I pay for everything I need and want. However, I do want an equal, someone on the same page as myself and not below. It does bother me that he won't tell me what he does. All he's said is that his company is going out of business and he might return to practicing law. Which is awful because I refused to date anymore lawyers. Truly horrible people, they are! (Yoda voice)
Don't write off lawyers. Some of my women and men friends are lawyers, and they're great people.
One way you might be able to find out what he does is to Google him. If that fails, doing an online search with one of those people search companies might turn up his place of employment, but you'd have to spring for the most expensive option in order to get that info.
Ultimately, it may not matter, since it sounds like he's going to be out of a job, and will be either launching his own law practice or trying to sell himself to an established firm. That seems like as good an answer to your question as any. He's heading for a major job transition, and is looking to dust off and reactivate his law degree. What more do you need to know? What's his area of expertise in the law, that would be helpful to know.
Yes, if I liked him, I would still date him. I do however , think it's a bit tacky to mention coupons and the like in a dating situations. But it is definitely not a deal breaker.
You know, my husband used a gift card on our very first real date. He said something along the lines of, "I have a gift card for this restaurant, you want to go there?".
And it never occurred to me that this was the least bit odd. I liked the idea we could have whatever we wanted and there would be no serious cost to either of us. It was cool.
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