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I remember when I was 18, a friend of my friends boyfriend was 30 at the time and apparently had a huge crush on me. He was always kinda flirty with me but I hated it. He was attractive (was a professional bike cyclist so he was ripped haha) but he was super weird and still relied on his parents for money. I found him repulsive cause of his very weird personality. Well, eventually I didn't see him around anymore. Fast forward 4 years later, my friend who was then married to the same guy she was dating when we were 18, ran into her husbands friend randomly, she mentioned me and he begged her to get us all together so he could see me again. She gave him my # without my permission and still wouldn't give up on me. I never went out with him..he then got super creepy but at least this time, he was a little bit more respectful.
My point is, I won't date guys who are that much older than me. Granted I was 18 at the time and then 22 but that still stands today at 26 years old. Of course there are exceptions and I'm more open minded about it now but for the most part, I won't seek out guys who are that much older than me, unless there was some great compatibility. Haha, watch, now that I said that, my next boyfriend will be 10 years older than me. I take after my mom in the way our lives have paralleled at similar ages, and she wound up marrying the one guy that was 10 years older than her, who is my dad..hehe that would be funny.
I remember when I was 18, a friend of my friends boyfriend was 30 at the time and apparently had a huge crush on me. He was always kinda flirty with me but I hated it. He was attractive (was a professional bike cyclist so he was ripped haha) but he was super weird and still relied on his parents for money. I found him repulsive cause of his very weird personality. Well, eventually I didn't see him around anymore. Fast forward 4 years later, my friend who was then married to the same guy she was dating when we were 18, ran into her husbands friend randomly, she mentioned me and he begged her to get us all together so he could see me again. She gave him my # without my permission and still wouldn't give up on me. I never went out with him..he then got super creepy but at least this time, he was a little bit more respectful.
My point is, I won't date guys who are that much older than me. Granted I was 18 at the time and then 22 but that still stands today at 26 years old. Of course there are exceptions and I'm more open minded about it now but for the most part, I won't seek out guys who are that much older than me, unless there was some great compatibility. Haha, watch, now that I said that, my next boyfriend will be 10 years older than me. I take after my mom in the way our lives have paralleled at similar ages, and she wound up marrying the one guy that was 10 years older than her, who is my dad..hehe that would be funny.
At your age, I kind of agree. But at age 39, though? 49 is no big deal. It's all relative.
Part of this has to do with where you are in life. It has to do with your own personal level of comfort and being at peace with yourself. You seem to be pretty comfortable, but everybody does things at their own pace.
I know when I was your age, they tried to set me up with a niece (by marriage) of a second cousin. She was six years younger, and that kind of freaked me out back then. I thought there was a huge difference between 27 and 21, not to mention the discomfort of dating in a situation where everybody in the family knows your business. (Too paranoid for that.) Repeating myself, but it's like in "The Godfather" where Michael Corleone was on a first date and walking around with that girl in the village and the whole family was joining them on the walk about 50 feet behind. (That was actually similar to how my cousin got introduced to the guy who would be her husband. They ended up at a birthday party for my brother. Kind of weird for Americans, I know.)
In hindsight ... she was an artsy type and I always get along with those kinds of girls. And we did get along well. But everything happens for a reason ... I am a much better person now than I was then.
Anyway, the point is that nowadays, 10 or 12 years' difference is probably about right from where I sit. But then again, I have a young personality. But the person on the other site of the table is also going to be on the same page. Not impossible, but that's the hard part.
Part of this has to do with where you are in life. It has to do with your own personal level of comfort and being at peace with yourself. You seem to be pretty comfortable, but everybody does things at their own pace.
I know when I was your age, they tried to set me up with a niece (by marriage) of a second cousin. She was six years younger, and that kind of freaked me out back then. I thought there was a huge difference between 27 and 21, not to mention the discomfort of dating in a situation where everybody in the family knows your business. (Too paranoid for that.) Repeating myself, but it's like in "The Godfather" where Michael Corleone was on a first date and walking around with that girl in the village and the whole family was joining them on the walk about 50 feet behind. (That was actually similar to how my cousin got introduced to the guy who would be her husband. They ended up at a birthday party for my brother. Kind of weird for Americans, I know.)
In hindsight ... she was an artsy type and I always get along with those kinds of girls. And we did get along well. But everything happens for a reason ... I am a much better person now than I was then.
Anyway, the point is that nowadays, 10 or 12 years' difference is probably about right from where I sit. But then again, I have a young personality. But the person on the other site of the table is also going to be on the same page. Not impossible, but that's the hard part.
I see what you're saying. I was involved with a guy 10 years older than me a few years ago and that helped me get over the age gap thing..but we never got serious cause I eventually couldn't stand him and I got back with my ex. At this point in my life, I'm fine with guys up to around 6 or so years older. The ones who were older have always been more serious anyways, except for the example I just gave of the guy 10 years older, haha.
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