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Brok, it can get better, lots better. You've gotta hang in there.
If examples help, I have friends and family who are happily married now, though one thought her burn scars would keep her alone forever, and another thought she was too fat to ever date, and I could go on and on with examples. I remember lots of weepy nights out and tissues and drinking despair when we were young -- ugh! But now they're older and very happy. The prettiest/smartest/popular cousins are the ones who most often end up divorced and alone, so go figure.
Just be a good person, put on your best smile and get out and meet people (easier said than done, I know -- try joining special-interest groups, or volunteer?). Be a good friend, keep meeting people, keep smiling, and just let it happen. Scars of all kinds don't put women off as much as you think; the shyness is probably the bigger obstacle right now.
If no luck, maybe try dating a self-centered abusive cheater for a while, and then when that's over, you'll LOVE being alone. That's what worked for me anyhow, I was married to one for 10 years.
Seriously though, best of luck to you, and keep your spirits up if you can. Therapy's a great idea -- we all need someone to talk to who won't judge, once in a while.
Accutane was kind of like DDT...it took care of the problem completely, but with heinous side effects.
Not true in most cases and the "DDT" comparison is absurd. I never had any side effects and most people don't. But that's not to say it doesn't happen.
Any side effect is investigated and is taken very seriously.
Probably off topic here but PM me if you want to discuss. I know a lot about this drug and have first hand knowledge that there is a high probabilty after treatment that self-esteem does go up.
Isotretinoin and Accutane is made the same way. That is Accutane is Isotretinoin. It's just not under Accutane anymore.
Adding that in no way am I pushing this. This must be discussed with a dermatologist or a primary care physician that is licensed to prescribe it as a prescription is only given to the patient in severe cases.
I feel these are my last years of life. I want to die. I want to be buried so I can move on the next life.
These are the best years of your life. 25 to 45 is supposed to be a persons prime.
Dont give up until you're 45. Until then, continue to try and develop a better sense of self worth and esteem. Having those two character traits will help your success tremendously.
As others have said, it is too soon for you to throw in the towel. You are way too young to want to tap out. Just because you may be a bit late to the party, doesn’t mean you should give up. Couple of things you need to realize. One, a relationship does not define you. Being single and/or never having a gf does not make you a loser. You want it, that’s fine, but don’t let not having it define you. There is so much more to life. This leads directly into the 2nd thing that others have mentioned. You need to be able to like yourself on some level. Where you are mentally right now, even if you had the social skills, you’d struggle to make friends or establish and sustain a relationship. No one wants to be around that. Everyone has problems. And even the most beautiful people are unhappy with something about their bodies. But most just keep quiet about it because they know that confidence is attractive. Dude, there are some ugly people shacked up with some very beautiful people. Don’t throw up unnecessary mental obstacles. People who are happy and outgoing make friends much easier than those who are negative. People tend to gravitate to the outgoing. Trust me, I used to have a similar outlook and a bad situation that I turned around myself. And I was suicidal. Twice in my life. And both times, I turned it around. I’ll be more than happy to elaborate if you care to hear.
Anyway, talk to someone, work on improving your self-esteem and outlook on life. If you are not in shape, get in shape. This can do wonders for brain chemistry and over-all self-image. Can’t get your acne scars fixed? Don’t worry about it. You’re a guy, not a model. Once you feel better about yourself, you can start working on trying to be more socially active. Making friends outside of school is much harder. So you have to find new ways and places to do it. Usually through hobbies or other social events. You’ll need some patience though. During this entire self-improvement, you may just find someone without looking. And if not, you can start looking once you’re not so defeated. And once you are in a relationship, you’ll have a whole new set of problems and gripes.
What happens to guys like you? They either find a girlfriend or they get worse because they never find one. Which one you will be, nobody on here knows that. I do agree though that this life is a lost cause and pointless.
Hey!! I know guys who have had this problem, and they stay locked up in their house, and never get out to have any fun, or socialize with anyone!! Thats no life! You find the beauty in your best traits first! What are they? Eyes, hair, body, ??U use the better traits to build your confidence with!! Women love guys to be very confident in them selves. They need to learn to stand up and be proud of who they are!! Confidence is a MUST!!!! So you have some acne scars...don`t alot of us, but we don1t bring ourselves down because of it.
C`mon!! Positive it the way to friendships!!!!!
What happens to guys like me? I'm going to be 29 in a few months. I never had a girlfriend. Actually, I never had a female friend. I've only had a few friends in my life and all of them were males. Whenever their female friends or girlfriends would appear, I would just leave. I am shy, quiet, and my behavior is antisocial. I lost hope of being friends with those who were my friends. It's been years since I had friends. I just stay in my bedroom the entire weekend. I want to die, but I'm not suicidal. I think it's too late. I missed the opportunities during my childhood and teenage years to develop social skills. I've actually gotten worse throughout the years. It's hard to make eye contact with girls I am attracted to so I look down or somewhere else if they are in front of me. I have very low self esteem and hate how I look--- I have acne scars on my face which are permanent scars. I already spoke with a dermatologist about it. He said lasers is too risky and would cause many negative side effects like discoloration and scarring. Another approach he said won't really do much since some of my acne scars are too deep. I am stick with this ugly face. It's no wonder I never had a girlfriend. I wish I had one. I lost hope of making friends with those who used to be my friends. I feel these are my last years of life. I want to die. I want to be buried so I can move on the next life.
What happens to guys like me? I'm going to be 29 in a few months. I never had a girlfriend. Actually, I never had a female friend. I've only had a few friends in my life and all of them were males. Whenever their female friends or girlfriends would appear, I would just leave. I am shy, quiet, and my behavior is antisocial. I lost hope of being friends with those who were my friends. It's been years since I had friends. I just stay in my bedroom the entire weekend. I want to die, but I'm not suicidal. I think it's too late. I missed the opportunities during my childhood and teenage years to develop social skills. I've actually gotten worse throughout the years. It's hard to make eye contact with girls I am attracted to so I look down or somewhere else if they are in front of me. I have very low self esteem and hate how I look--- I have acne scars on my face which are permanent scars. I already spoke with a dermatologist about it. He said lasers is too risky and would cause many negative side effects like discoloration and scarring. Another approach he said won't really do much since some of my acne scars are too deep. I am stick with this ugly face. It's no wonder I never had a girlfriend. I wish I had one. I lost hope of making friends with those who used to be my friends. I feel these are my last years of life. I want to die. I want to be buried so I can move on the next life.
Bro you're 29 not 89, its not that serious. You just have to put yourself out there more. And be more aggressive with women, I know that can be difficult when you're shy but you have to fight through it.
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