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Yes, there are women who will not have sex on the first date, no matter what. (Note that I am distinguishing between dating and a woman who goes out with the intent of hooking up.)
I know some women who won't have sex with a guy until there's been some sort of discussion about sexual history/safer sex and/or have seen the results of a recent STD screen.
You don't believe that lots of people deliberately get drunk as an excuse for a planned behavior that "they didn't plan to do"?
This includes sex but it's not limited to sex only at all.
Is there a difference between giving it up on the first date vs. making the guy wait until the 3rd or 4th?
Will it cause him to look at her any differently?
Is there a difference in waiting til the 3rd or 4th date instead of the 1st?
It's not "just sex" to many many people. It's allowing a person close to you in a very personal and private way, literally and figuratively stripping yourself bare and being completely exposed. I don't think there is any shame in not wanting to do this in front of a stranger, be made to feel like a conquest, or shamed for not doing so after a mere few hours in that stranger's presence.
I'm in my 40s now and married, but I believe in having a good time, and that life is short.
If I went out with a guy and we really hit it off to the point we didn't want to leave each other's company? You're damn right I'd go home with him or invite him back to my place. But there had to be serious chemistry, and protection.
Is there a difference in waiting til the 3rd or 4th date instead of the 1st?
It's not "just sex" to many many people. It's allowing a person close to you in a very personal and private way, literally and figuratively stripping yourself bare and being completely exposed. I don't think there is any shame in not wanting to do this in front of a stranger, be made to feel like a conquest, or shamed for not doing so after a mere few hours in that stranger's presence.
I frankly think there isn't much of a difference. There's a certain mentality that we're speaking and if someone doesn't do something "because of what the other side will say", then it's rather about faking their true personality.
People delay sex for two reasons:
1. because there are certain things that they think are needed before having sex with someone, out of personal conviction, the way they were taught and the way they reason in general (generally related to relationship)
2. because they want to show themselves in a different light so that they can manipulate the other person by displaying something they are not. And it's not much of a difference than when people lie about themselves, their feelings or their intentions, just to get laid.
Quote:
Originally Posted by convextech
I'm in my 40s now and married, but I believe in having a good time, and that life is short.
If I went out with a guy and we really hit it off to the point we didn't want to leave each other's company? You're damn right I'd go home with him or invite him back to my place. But there had to be serious chemistry, and protection.
Yeah, that's the "you only live once" attitude characteristic for so many folks. Use your own advice and have sex with someone else, monogamy is boring and life is short. Remember, it's not cheating if you don't get caught. Not even if you father a child somewhere else with another woman. Your wife won't be angry about something she doesn't know, and there's no damage done, right.
You don't believe that lots of people deliberately get drunk as an excuse for a planned behavior that "they didn't plan to do"?
This includes sex but it's not limited to sex only at all.
Sure. But saying 'just get her drunk so she'll give in' is a bit rapey.
There are many, a majority, which grows smaller as one gets older.
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