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Right. And the good news is that the latter can be improved. So I don't see any point in checking out the size/skills in advance of dating.
Plus, how can you rate a persons sexual performance based on one time? I have no qualms whatsoever about telling a guy exactly what is good/bad, but sometimes it takes a bit of practice to get things right.
To address your concerns specifically, shortnblack, most women don't care about penis size -- but they care a lot about non-penis-related sexual skills.
Not a concern Nila, but a curiosity indeed.
OK, I can agree with your most if the majority percent is a ratio of 5.5 to 4.5 of women who don't care about size because there are a lot that do. Oh you know there's always a large group of women who will publicly say that it never matters because the importance lies ins how he uses it right? That's not true because it does matter to a degree but it's of less importance than what men have been brainwashed to think how much it matters. Women have told me quite honestly that it does. Nuff stuff on the web from women and legit social media saying that it does matter.
I do. Not on the first date (or before, as you seem to be implying) but pretty early.
I don't want to be emotionally invested and then discover we are not sexually compatible. BT,DT.
It's also a good test to see if the guy has virgin/wh*re issues. Though that has not been a problem with anyone I have dated so far. Those guys don't get that far .
Precisely! I don't care to wait very long. I like to assess sexual compatibility.
Quote:
Originally Posted by NilaJones
To address your concerns specifically, shortnblack, most women don't care about penis size -- but they care a lot about non-penis-related sexual skills.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Of course. Far too often I've waited or dealt with people that wanted to wait and found out we weren't sexually compatible. I'm not going to be in a committed relationship with someone I'm not sexually compatible with nor am I going to let myself fall for someone until I know there is potential (if I can help it) for something more.
If she feels she has to lie on her back and open her legs to determine if a guy is "caliber worthy," then her self perception of self-worth needs some reassessment, seriously.
If sex means she lies on her back and opens her legs, then she has way bigger problems.
Originally Posted by NilaJones To address your concerns ...most women don't care about penis size -- but they care a lot about non-penis-related sexual skills.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
Right. And the good news is that the latter can be improved. So I don't see any point in checking out the size/skills in advance of dating.
What I am checking for is not technical skill. It's a mindset. And I tried to teach it to my (kind, loving, giving, sweet) ex and it was no go.
I have concluded that, at our age, if a guy isn't there he is not interested in going there -- and this matters, to me.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NilaJones
What I am checking for is not technical skill. It's a mindset. And I tried to teach it to my (kind, loving, giving, sweet) ex and it was no go.
Finding a woman that you can engage with mentally re sex (I don't mean talking about it), really connect with and be able to have that sharp mental foreplay (again, not really meaning overt discussion) with is so very hard to find. Most people aren't capable of having sex with their mind, I don't think. When I find it, I'm in heaven.
Finding a woman that you can engage with mentally re sex (I don't mean talking about it), really connect with and be able to have that sharp mental foreplay (again, not really meaning overt discussion) with is so very hard to find. Most people aren't capable of having sex with their mind, I don't think. When I find it, I'm in heaven.
Well that, it seems like you could identify without actually getting nekkid, right?
But I do think you are right that we are looking for similar stuff .
For me it's the ability, and preference, for losing oneself completely in the moment, and embodiment, and exploring rather than following a script, and number of hours in bed .
Generally not stuff people will accurately self-report on, sad to say.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JetJockey
Plus, how can you rate a persons sexual performance based on one time?...sometimes it takes a bit of practice to get things right.
Yeah. Or you get a guy like one ex of mine who quite honestly said to me, 'That stuff is only for the first time.' WTF?
So apparently at least 2 or 3 times is necessary... by which time you are basically in a relationship. This is a puzzle I have not solved, yet.
Finding a woman that you can engage with mentally re sex (I don't mean talking about it), really connect with and be able to have that sharp mental foreplay (again, not really meaning overt discussion) with is so very hard to find. Most people aren't capable of having sex with their mind, I don't think. When I find it, I'm in heaven.
Precisely. That is intellectual intimacy. I crave that. I have had the pleasure of experiencing it a few times, and it is bliss.
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