Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I used to work with a married man that has recently got in touch to say that he misses the friendship we used to have at work and would like us to be friends again, after we lost touch when I left. When we were friends at work we never saw each other out of work and this was fine.
He says he thinks we would make good friends because we have a lot in common, which is true we are very similar, but because he is married I am a little worried. He has emailed me and hasn't been flirty, it has been strictly platonic, but I am getting a little concerned because he revealed recently that his wife doesn't know he emails me. Since then he has also asked to meet up, I don't want to without his wife's knowledge. There again I do not want to offend him by insinuating he is up to no good, maybe his wife gets very jealous or there is some other explanation.
The other day I mentioned I was moving and he has offered to help me look, the houses so far have been in easy distance of where he lives, so I wondered what your experience or what your take on this is, or how I should approach it. Men don't offer to do this sort of thing out of the goodness of their own heart do they?! Am I being ridiculous suspecting something may be afoot?
Last edited by Apple Pip; 01-05-2014 at 03:59 AM..
Reason: I am single.
Nope, that he's been flirty and has informed you his wife doesn't know he emails you blatantly says this guy is not on the up and up about being 'real' friends. He's got some marriage issues and is looking for some attention - not necessarily sex.
I have a few male friends, married or otherwise involved and my presence and friendship is well known to these women and I am even friends with them. So, I believe it can work - just not in the situation you just laid out.
Nope, that he's been flirty and has informed you his wife doesn't know he emails you blatantly says this guy is not on the up and up about being 'real' friends. He's got some marriage issues and is looking for some attention - not necessarily sex.
I have a few male friends, married or otherwise involved and my presence and friendship is well known to these women and I am even friends with them. So, I believe it can work - just not in the situation you just laid out.
I used to work with a married man that has recently got in touch to say that he misses the friendship we used to have at work and would like us to be friends again, after we lost touch when I left. When we were friends at work we never saw each other out of work and this was fine.
He says he thinks we would make good friends because we have a lot in common, which is true we are very similar, but because he is married I am a little worried. He has emailed me and hasn't been flirty, it has been strictly platonic, but I am getting a little concerned because he revealed recently that his wife doesn't know he emails me. Since then he has also asked to meet up, I don't want to without his wife's knowledge. There again I do not want to offend him by insinuating he is up to no good, maybe his wife gets very jealous or there is some other explanation.
The other day I mentioned I was moving and he has offered to help me look, the houses so far have been in easy distance of where he lives, so I wondered what your experience or what your take on this is, or how I should approach it. Men don't offer to do this sort of thing out of the goodness of their own heart do they?! Am I being ridiculous suspecting something may be afoot?
Some guys might do this out of the kindness of their heart. However, if the wife doesn't know and you're not close with the wife.. there is definitely something up.
We have so much in common, would it be worth asking him do you think why he hasn't told his wife? Also if it just a little attention, some chat about interests is it okay to just email every now and then and not meet up, would that be considered wrong, if it is strictly platonic?
We have so much in common, would it be worth asking him do you think why he hasn't told his wife? Also if it just a little attention, some chat about interests is it okay to just email every now and then and not meet up, would that be considered wrong, if it is strictly platonic?
Here we go. I believe this is now a case of your posting to get approval and hear what you want to hear and not really listening to any advice that contradicts what you want to hear. You'll do whatever you want in the end so why waste time posting and asking for people's opinion and advice? You did ask the question of concern it was more than platonic intentions on his part and many have agreed with that.
We have so much in common, would it be worth asking him do you think why he hasn't told his wife? Also if it just a little attention, some chat about interests is it okay to just email every now and then and not meet up, would that be considered wrong, if it is strictly platonic?
It's funny to see adults with less common sense than a 12 year old.
Fair comment. I'm not looking for approval to pursue, I wanted to check what people thought, if it was platonic. Just because 2 or 3 people say it isn't, doesn't form the whole consensus of opinion. I wondered if anyone else had exchanged the odd email platonically with someone married and if it had stayed that way. I suppose that is with the wife's knowledge though. It was more someone else's experience of this situation I was after.
Or next time he mentions a meet up say, sure, Id love to meet your wife. See what his reaction to that is. If he doesnt want you meeting her, you know your answer.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
