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So true. I made a post yesterday, in reference to the friendzone, that dating never used to be so ambiguous. If someone asked you out, and you weren't interested, it ended there. You didn't settle for being friends as an alternative, when one of you wanted more.
I find that much simpler than now, where people want to hang out and be non-committal, or linger around, hoping and wishing for the attention of someone who has already told you they'd not interested in dating you.
If I'm interested in a girl, but she doesn't reciprocate those feelings, I usually end it there. Female friends are in my social circle whom are simply just friends, and that's where I typically draw the line.
Most men would gladly accept an invitation to a date even if they didn't think the woman was good-looking. Contrast that to most women, ho would find the vast majority of men physically unattractive and/or not rich enough and thus not worth a single date. We hav. a lot of men giving up on dating due to rejection of ly exists a woman who I find attractive and who wouldn't reject me, but since I'm 0 for 3, I constantly doubt myself and am afraid of striking out more because it'll further compound my lack of confidence.
I dont know about you. Where im from NYC large swaths of women are very assertive thanks to their upbringing. they will let you know if they like you or find you physically attractive, unattractive and very opinionated about what they like in a man.. I have had quite a couple of women ask me out in occasion. but as of lately from my observation women do value a good looking man more than anything. Lately it has become hard for average guys to find a meaningful woman. I feel like going to Thailand or Brazil at times.
NY women are as picky as it comes. That is why so many are lonely.
From my experience and observation this is very true about NYC women. The reason why women are so picky in NYC is due to its sheer density and amount of people in the city. Also women in NYC are very shallow and stuckup which adds more fire for women to be picky.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Woodie54
I am a male from new York,And according to the staticks ther are many more women than men in new York,and I have heard that many women are complaining that they cnnot find a man ,ther are so many happy guys out ther (if you know what I am saying)marriage no way.
Women in NYC can find a man, their are plenty of women in NYC of all shapes, sizes and income stratas having huge amount of sex, making babies and etc, however many will not or never get married or have a long meaningful longterm relationship. Having more women than men makes dating much more difficult in NYC for both men and women in the city. NYC has 200,000 more single women than single men which creates plenty of variety for men which is also not good, however men in NYC are very thirsty and the cities density adds more fuel to the fire of making women very picky. Also NYC is not a city for average men, cities like LA, or Miami might be better suited for average men. But in NYC if your not good looking or if you don't have a lot of money you are in trouble in the dating world. Women in NYC are very assertive and they know what they want and like, they will let you know.
Not all women are like that, though. I agree that you have the shallow women who only care about looks and money, but plenty of women in NYC aren't like that. You'll know what they want just by talking to them in the first 5-10 minutes.
Last edited by NewYorker11356; 03-09-2014 at 09:16 PM..
Perhaps you might meet some nice men, if you join a fishing, hiking, biking, bird watching, or photography club.
Are these your interests?
The only one that truly appeals to me is photography.
I have interests I pursue, so not a hermit :P
Quote:
Originally Posted by usamathman
Welcome to real life. Sometimes you have to be willing to reach a little to get what you truly want. The guys you have been conversing with up to this point are idiots. That is why they reacted the way they did. If a guy is interested in you then he will definitely reciprocate your advance. If he is not interested he will either give you a funny look or politely say no thanks and end conversation.
Don't let the few dummies you have been in contact with ruin it for the rest of us guys.
I think you missed a part of my point - I don't really find a man attractive if I have to pursue/initiate.
This is because much of what makes a man attractive to me is discovered through some interaction.
So what I want & what builds attraction for me is when a man is assertive & pursues me.
Also women in NYC are very shallow and stuckup which adds more fire for women to be picky.
Not the NYC women I know.
Quote:
Originally Posted by NewYorker11356
Not all women are like that, though. I agree that you have the shallow women who only care about looks and money, but plenty of women in NYC aren't like that. You'll know what they want just by talking to them in the first 5-10 minutes.
Bronx, you're smarter than that! You don't really believe that ALL the hundreds of thousands of women in NYC (how many are there, anyway--a million?) are the same, do you? I know for a fact they're not all shallow and stuck up.
Wait, didn't you have a date last week? And she tried to kiss you but you rejected her?
Yeah, she is the 2nd woman I kissed. Before her, I had never been on a date. Now that experience is over and I don't plan on doing this again for a long time.
Bronx, you're smarter than that! You don't really believe that ALL the hundreds of thousands of women in NYC (how many are there, anyway--a million?) are the same, do you? I know for a fact they're not all shallow and stuck up.
Of course I'm smarter than that. And no I don't belive all women in my area are like that, however most of them are thanks to the environment and up bringing in the past 40 years like feminism and the rise of single mom households, women who grew up in these type of environments tend to be assertive and also wear pants in the relationship. Then again I could be wrong. Actually I know a woman that I date occasionally is from a two parent household here in the city, she is real nice, cool and sweet, and again she is not stuck up and shallow, and last I do not want to break heart. The women with father issues here in NYC from my experience and observation tend to be stuck up, shallow and insecure at times. Again not all women are like that but a good number perhaps maybe majority are like that! I'm not sure but I hear that much of the Northeast is like that what I have mentioned especially in urban areas. I would like a woman to initiate not because I'm good looking, or look like a money type, but maybe she finds me interesting from my bravado or posture, however that's never the case. What I like is an egalitarian approach of dating and relationship instead of one being more assertive over the other. But then again one sex has to have power over the other.
As for the OP, if you want an assertive women, where women initiate the Northeast is probably your best bet! But again you better be good looking! I know it gets boring but also tedious in putting in to much effort and input into dating and relationship choices. Also you have to becareful with assertive women, even though they might not wrongfully lead you on, assertive women will reject you at will compared to non assertive women.
Last edited by Bronxguyanese; 03-10-2014 at 12:38 AM..
I think that if more women would make up their mind about what they want, the men would be a little more proactive in approaching. Here in New York single woman complain all the time about being approached by too many guys. I have met a few single women that wear wedding rings just to have an excuse to give guys when they approach. All I hear from many of these woman is how they are tired of being hit on by men.
You ladies have to make your minds up what you want. If you don't want to be approached then get married or stay in the house. Can't get upset with men when they show interest.
Ladies that is the reason so few men approach. Many are confused. They don't know what to expect because you ladies give so many mixed signals.
And fellas......don't let rejection cause you to give up. Keep going at it until you find what you need. Keep talking to these ladies until you get the ONE YES you have been waiting for. Don't let No's keep you from your Yes.
I know I definitely won't.
I'm not sure if I repped you or not. But again I have to agree with you. I really don't understand howsome women say that cant find a decent man, however they don't want a man to approach them and yell creep. And often some of these guys might be decent types. It is really one strange anomaly. I wonder how many of these types of women are also sleeping with side fwb/nsa nonrelationship type of guys?
Location: I don't know..If you find me, let me know.
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Because women don't have to be. Why put yourself out there, and make a fool of yourself when men are willing to do it.
You're also assuming women think the same about dating and relationships as men, which they don't.
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I wonder how many of these types of women are also sleeping with side fwb/nsa nonrelationship type of guys?
