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I met this guy online a little over two months ago. He is really sweet and a great father to his two kids. My problem is he's moved so fast that my head is spinning.
We talked online for about a day then he decided he wanted to text me instead. After texting for three days he wanted to meet. I thought that was a little fast but I agreed. He knocked on my door and he looked stunned, took a step back and dropped his jaw. It's not like what you would see in a movie this guys actually couldn't control it. My best friend was there and the both of us busted out laughing. I know we shouldn't have done that but it was unlike anything we've ever seen. Our first date went well very well in fact I agreed to see him again later that week.
Our second date he took me to build-a-bear and bought bears for myself, my two kids and his two kids along with outfits. How sweet. After week two of talking he asked if he could buy me a cell phone and he would pay the bill. I told him flat out no. Seriously who does that? He told me it was bc he couldn't text me while he was at work bc Of a cell phone block so if he bought me an iPhone he could use wifi instead. So after dating for a month he bought me the iPhone and just gave it to me. Hmmmmm. Is he checking up on me? That day he told me he loved me.
At week 6 it got really weird. He booked a trip for us meaning him and I and our kids to Disney world for next July. Then he proceeded to tell me while he was doing that he was looking at rings. He said not for now but in the future. Then we met each other's families. My sister hated him but my mother loved him. His parents fell in love with me. They told me that they have never seen his son so in love with someone and they didn't know why until they met me. Are his parents crazy too? Week 7 he asked about moving in together and asked if I'd marry him via text. If and when we were ready. Ummmm....I Don't Know You!!!!!
We are in week 8 and I'm babysitting his son over night this entire weekend. What have I gotten myself into? Everyone around me including me sees that this man does love me but I don't know why it could happen this fast. Am I missing something? I am kind of creeped out but flattered at the same time. Has anyone experienced anything like this? If you think I should run let me know!!!! Seriously am I over thinking?
I've had guys profess their love very early on. Some were genuine and great, and one in particular was a crazy sociopath.
One thing I have noticed though is that often people who are very quick to fall in love and who move very fast, can sometimes be the kind of people who are also very quick to fall out of love with you and easily quickly move on to someone else.
He is either extremely needy (and emotionally unstable), or he's a sociopath. Either way, he is not in this relationship for YOU AS A PERSON, he is in it for HIM AND HIS NEEDS.
If he is a sociopath and he's using you for some hidden agenda, what you're experiencing is called love-bombing. Google it, there's a ton of information out there on it. The purpose of love-bombing is to pull the victim in so fast that she doesn't have time to think about what's actually happening. Time works against social predators - they need you to fall for them quickly so that you are more apt to overlook the obvious red flags that are already waving in your face.
You need to draw some boundaries with this guy. Even if he thinks his intentions are good, he is moving WAY too fast. Normal, healthy people do not move this fast. It's like he's trying to OWN you, rather than know you as a person. He "needs" you for whatever reason - what that reason is, you don't know and that's what's so scary here. You don't really know what his intentions are for you. BIG red flag.
If you are feeling uncomfortable, you have every right to put the brakes on and do whatever you need to do to feel comfortable again. Even if that means ENDING it with him. You have every right to not do what you don't want to do. And unstable people don't like people who have backbones.
You have kids. THEY have to be your first priority every single day.
I agree with this 100 percent.
The one guy who I mentioned that did this with me and who turned out to be a crazy sociopath, well I am glad that I have no kids. I will not go into details but will just say a restraining order was involved.
I don't want to scare the OP though. Some people are just very passionate, impulsive and impatient, but like I also said in previous post that they often fall out of love with you as quickly as they fall in love with you.
I never agreed to any of it. I just said lets wait and see what happens. I have kids and so does he. He has no record. His father and brother are police officers and he and his mother are nurses. he does have two crazy baby mommas. I feel I'm the only "normal" person he's dated. I feel like things are moving way too fast and when I explained that to him he stopped mentioning it to me but that was only two weeks ago. I appreciate the feedback and I'm listening to you all. Keep it coming.
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