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like others have said- I would recommend therapy- it sounds like you might have some kind of social anxiety disorder- here is a book I would recommend that is helpful for people who suffer from anxiety disorders and/or depression- Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
If you can not afford to buy it then borrow a copy from your library
you are young and they is plenty of time to change and improve-and anyone else out there young or old I would keep this quote in mind who wants to change
"It is never too late to be what you might have been." - George Eliot
and here is a good inspirational video for anyone thinking of making a change
Better to not be pursued than having someone totally undesirable pursue you.
Maybe.
But you can still learn things about yourself and others from that undesirable pursuer.
There can be long-term positive value and benefits from having an occasional bad experience or from occasionally screwing up. It can give you a more realistic perspective of the world. You become wiser.
Sometimes, "on-the-job" trial-and-error is the best way to learn.
The people who don't try at all are the ones who fall behind and are nearly guaranteed to "lose". You have to go after what you want. Victim mentality gets you nowhere and causes others to lose respect for you. You have to take risks...common sense and intelligence are used to minimize taking obviously stupid actions.
Here is some additional advice I will offer to you (and others looking for dates) -Technology can be of assistance- here some new smartphone apps in some but not all cities that can help u get a date and get the relationship ball rolling (these are not Tinder-they are higher quality dating apps than Tinder)- I use these myself
Hinge- a dating app https://www.facebook.com/hingeapp https://www.facebook.com/games/cmb_prod/?fbs=-1
What is it with some of you guys? You need to get over this defeatist attitude. And before you jump all over me, I had very little luck with women until I reached my mid twenties. Never dated at all in high school, asked several and was turned down. At some point you just have to put yourself out there and take some risks. Personally, I'd rather be turned down 200 times and go out on a handful of dates than sit and complain endlessly. If i can be successful dating, any guy can. If you constantly think negative, then yes you'll have little success.
Who wants get rejected 200 times? I'd rather slam my hand in a car door over asking 200 women out. It's NOT worth the risk.
Is this behavior abnormal? especially for a man who would like women in his life(I'm 23)? Not even in high school have I flirted/pursued a woman. I don't know what's wrong with me. But I made this realization just now. I was reading this book and it said a man should approach a woman who he is attracted to, by making her attracted to him by building attraction through flirting. A typical mistake beta males make is try to become her friend and then try to build attraction.
I realize I wasted so much of my life and missed out on a lot. All the girls(in my age group) I know are on a "high, bye" relationship with me. Initially a girl will tolerate my company but then later she will try to avoid or simply greet and leave ASAP.
I'm considering meeting with this one escort so I can touch a woman and gain experience with them quickly. Only thing stopping me right now is that I'm cheap.
No such thing. I'm recently learning that all the flirting/courting BS is nonsense. Women know in .5 seconds whether they would bang/mess with you. They want you to chase and flirt just to see how long you will do it. If you stroke their ego for too long, you will be considered a fool and friend zoned. Just saying.....
No such thing. I'm recently learning that all the flirting/courting BS is nonsense. Women know in .5 seconds whether they would bang/mess with you. They want you to chase and flirt just to see how long you will do it. If you stroke their ego for too long, you will be considered a fool and friend zoned. Just saying.....
Actually, flirting is fun. Plain and simple. It also communicates a lot.
In my view, a guy who doesn't enjoy a little bit of lighthearted fun is probably not the guy for me.
Also, just so you know: the "They just...want to see how long you will do it" resentful attitude shows. Even when you try to hide it. Maybe that's part of the problem here. Resentful guys who don't enjoy dating aren't usually very attractive. And yes, that's something a woman (or anyone) can feel within five seconds.
Its not anger or hatred its just misunderstanding. People that find meeting women easy do not understand why others find it difficult.
Baloney. I believe several posters here have already stated that they did find it difficult, but they did it anyway. And in real life - v. the Wild and Wacky World of Teh Intranets - I have heard SO MANY guys say they found dating difficult until they became comfortable asking women out.
Excuses, excuses. And my God but the level of resentment on this thread. You guys think women can't sense this attitude?
Baloney. I believe several posters here have already stated that they did find it difficult, but they did it anyway. And in real life - v. the Wild and Wacky World of Teh Intranets - I have heard SO MANY guys say they found dating difficult until they became comfortable asking women out.
Excuses, excuses. And my God but the level of resentment on this thread. You guys think women can't sense this attitude?
When you know you're unattractive to women there is no point trying. Its akin to banging one's head against the wall repeatedly.
Do not count me amongst the resentful.
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