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Most of the men will be hostile to points #1,2. I am just curious if the women think this is good advice or not. For the TLDR people here are the cliff notes:
Ignore him. When a guy first contacts you, ignore him. Don’t answer his calls or call him back right away. Wait a few days. He needs to know you’re busy and you have a life. You’re not desperate, and you don’t need a man to be happy.
Love yourself. You should work harder at improving yourself than you work at your relationship. If you’re struggling with a problem in your personal life, such as a health issue or a work situation, make that your priority.
Make him work around your schedule. Never put your significant other’s life before your own. If he asks you to go to an event with him that conflicts with something important in your life, tell him no.
Be a woman of your word. No one is perfect. There are certain things with which a woman is and isn’t willing to put up. From the beginning of the relationship, it’s important to vocalize what you want and expect. If there’s a problem, tell your man he needs to fix it or you will show him the door.
Maintain your own life but compromise. Let him have a night out with they boys and don’t be afraid to have your girls’ night, too. It’s important do your own thing, and it’s healthy to have activities you love to do together.
Praise him. It’s essential to never take the little things for granted and constantly verbalize how much you appreciate your significant other. It gives a man great satisfaction to take care of the woman he loves, and it means the world to him to hear praise for his kind acts.
Ok here are my comments for each point.
1. When you ignore a guy you are acting exactly like a woman that has no interest which we men get a lot of. How are we supposed to know which women are interested and which are not but are following these silly rules?
2. A woman only needs to tell me no ONCE. No means no, I will not ask again. So a woman values herself that she is worth being asked more then once while a man values himself that a woman isn't worth asking again if she said no the first time. Lets not forget that for a fair number of men how much courage it takes for him to even ask especially if the woman is already ignoring him from #1. And people wonder why the marriage rates are dropping. Here is a quick man tip. More then a few 'Nice guys', the kind respectful sensitive ones that women say they want, will respect a woman's no and not keep chasing like a creepy stalker. Players will be undeterred and keep chasing. Between #1 and #2 I wonder how many potential relationships died before they were even started.
3. Good advice for anyone. Everyone needs to take care of themselves first before they can think about taking care of someone else.
4. That is fine also as long as its fine that he makes you work around his schedule too.
5. I can't help but notice the female version of keeping your word is a big difference compared to the male version of it. A man being a man of his word means to keep his promises and commitments that he makes to other people. In this article a woman being a woman of her word means keeping her promises and commitments that she made to herself about what she wants and needs out of the relationship.
6. Good advice.
7. Great advice. After ignoring him, rejecting him, making him work around your schedule, and keeping your word to yourself that he is giving and treating you the way you expect he should be given some praise for it.
That said, I have a loosely relevant side story that I'm pretty certain I've told before, but it merits repeating:
I had a neighbor in my apartment complex that came knocking on my door with a guise for what would ultimately be a one night stand. We go out, we come back, she invites me in, we have sex. I'm going back to my place, and she says something to the effect of, "And I don't want you knocking on my door thinking you're just going to get this again".
My first thought was, "hey, no problem....I'm not that kind of guy". But my instant second thought was, "wait...why not?"
And I couldn't get her out of my head for weeks. There was no logical reason for it, other than "I can't have her".
Mind games. They're silly, but they work, depending on what you're trying to accomplish. In her case, it wasn't so much a game as it was a legit ONS...but the effect could've been so much more if she wanted it to be.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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You do #1 or #2 to the Diss, you might as well wake the up because your dream of dating him ends right then and there. No reconsideration, no exceptions.
Not surprisingly, if a woman ignore or rejects me, I assume they're not interested. Why would I think otherwise?
However, looking back, I've realized that MANY women have used these two strategies on me, neither of which has ever worked and only decreased my attraction to them.
Quote:
[*]Make him work around your schedule. Never put your significant other’s life before your own. If he asks you to go to an event with him that conflicts with something important in your life, tell him no.
This depends what it is and how long we are dating. If a close family member of mine dies and their funeral happens to coincide with her dental appointment and she doesn't come with me because of this, I would probably break up with her.
Quote:
[*]Love yourself. You should work harder at improving yourself than you work at your relationship. If you’re struggling with a problem in your personal life, such as a health issue or a work situation, make that your priority.[*]Be a woman of your word. No one is perfect. There are certain things with which a woman is and isn’t willing to put up. From the beginning of the relationship, it’s important to vocalize what you want and expect. If there’s a problem, tell your man he needs to fix it or you will show him the door.[*]Maintain your own life but compromise. Let him have a night out with they boys and don’t be afraid to have your girls’ night, too. It’s important do your own thing, and it’s healthy to have activities you love to do together.[*]Praise him. It’s essential to never take the little things for granted and constantly verbalize how much you appreciate your significant other. It gives a man great satisfaction to take care of the woman he loves, and it means the world to him to hear praise for his kind acts.
...
2. A woman only needs to tell me no ONCE. No means no, I will not ask again.
And that's the crux of the matter. In a culture of "no means no", the last thing with which a man would care to contend, is an accusation of harassment or other impropriety. If the very first foray isn't met with warm receptivity, it's best to desist. This isn't because I'm busy or proud. It's because any proposition is already a risk of one's reputation, and therefore any issuance of dismissal is automatically final.
From the above-cited article: "It’s an old-fashioned idea, but a man should court a woman throughout the entire relationship." Indeed, but pray tell, how does demonstrative shunting aside of a man somehow constitute responsible participation in the courtship ritual? For a man to do the courting, ought not a woman be willing to be courted?
Last edited by ohio_peasant; 12-21-2014 at 10:02 PM..
And that's the crux of the matter. In a culture of "no means no", the last thing with which a man would care to contend, is an accusation of harassment or other impropriety. If the very first foray isn't met with warm receptivity, it's best to desist. This isn't because I'm busy or proud. It's because any proposition is already a risk of one's reputation, and therefore any issuance of dismissal is automatically final.
From the above-cited article: "It’s an old-fashioned idea, but a man should court a woman throughout the entire relationship." Indeed, but pray tell, how does demonstrative shunting aside of a man somehow constitute responsible participation in the courtship ritual? For a man to do the courting, ought not a woman be willing to be courted?
I still don't understand why I'm expected to court a woman when they're supposedly equal to us. Why doesn't she court me?
I would be willing to do it, but I'll need significant proof of her worthiness before I can do that....and, of course, the vast majority of women are too immoral to even want to court them.
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up because your dream of dating him ends right then and there. No reconsideration, no exceptions.
